Trump orders Barr to investigate the nations ramps!

[DrLove]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Arguing that “there’s something going on” with the nation’s sloping surfaces, Donald J. Trump has ordered Attorney General Bill Barr to launch a Department of Justice investigation into the United States’s vast collection of ramps.​

​

“It’s something we’re looking into quite strongly,” Trump told reporters on the South Lawn of the White House. “Ramps have treated me very unfairly.”​

​

The decision to probe the nation’s ramps came after a night of Trump feverishly retweeting anti-ramp conspiracy theories, including one claiming that George Soros had plotted to make American ramps steeper and slipperier than they were during Barack Obama’s Presidency.​

​

Trump told reporters that he was also considering signing an executive order requiring all ramps to have an incline of zero degrees, rendering them completely flat.​

​

“Those would be perfect ramps,” he said.​

​

Responding to this proposal, CNN’s Jim Acosta asked if, by making ramps flat, Trump would in effect be making the nation’s ramps no longer ramps at all.​

​

“You’re a terrible person,” Trump replied.​

Trump Orders Bill Barr to Investigate Nationâs Ramps

“It’s something we’re looking into quite strongly,” Trump told reporters. “Ramps have treated me very unfairly.”

www.newyorker.com

 

[Rambunctious]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Arguing that “there’s something going on” with the nation’s sloping surfaces, Donald J. Trump has ordered Attorney General Bill Barr to launch a Department of Justice investigation into the United States’s vast collection of ramps.​

​

“It’s something we’re looking into quite strongly,” Trump told reporters on the South Lawn of the White House. “Ramps have treated me very unfairly.”​

​

The decision to probe the nation’s ramps came after a night of Trump feverishly retweeting anti-ramp conspiracy theories, including one claiming that George Soros had plotted to make American ramps steeper and slipperier than they were during Barack Obama’s Presidency.​

​

Trump told reporters that he was also considering signing an executive order requiring all ramps to have an incline of zero degrees, rendering them completely flat.​

​

“Those would be perfect ramps,” he said.​

​

Responding to this proposal, CNN’s Jim Acosta asked if, by making ramps flat, Trump would in effect be making the nation’s ramps no longer ramps at all.​

​

“You’re a terrible person,” Trump replied.​

Trump Orders Bill Barr to Investigate Nationâs Ramps

“It’s something we’re looking into quite strongly,” Trump told reporters. “Ramps have treated me very unfairly.”

www.newyorker.com

....

 

[Muhammed]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Arguing that “there’s something going on” with the nation’s sloping surfaces, Donald J. Trump has ordered Attorney General Bill Barr to launch a Department of Justice investigation into the United States’s vast collection of ramps.​

​

“It’s something we’re looking into quite strongly,” Trump told reporters on the South Lawn of the White House. “Ramps have treated me very unfairly.”​

​

The decision to probe the nation’s ramps came after a night of Trump feverishly retweeting anti-ramp conspiracy theories, including one claiming that George Soros had plotted to make American ramps steeper and slipperier than they were during Barack Obama’s Presidency.​

​

Trump told reporters that he was also considering signing an executive order requiring all ramps to have an incline of zero degrees, rendering them completely flat.​

​

“Those would be perfect ramps,” he said.​

​

Responding to this proposal, CNN’s Jim Acosta asked if, by making ramps flat, Trump would in effect be making the nation’s ramps no longer ramps at all.​

​

“You’re a terrible person,” Trump replied.​

Trump Orders Bill Barr to Investigate Nationâs Ramps

“It’s something we’re looking into quite strongly,” Trump told reporters. “Ramps have treated me very unfairly.”

www.newyorker.com

A 12:1 slope is the maximum slope allowed for a pedestrian ramp under the Americans with Disabilities Act regulations. That is, for every 12 inches of run, the maximum rise is 1 inch.

And the slope in that pic is clearly much steeper than that.

 

[DrLove]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Arguing that “there’s something going on” with the nation’s sloping surfaces, Donald J. Trump has ordered Attorney General Bill Barr to launch a Department of Justice investigation into the United States’s vast collection of ramps.​

​

“It’s something we’re looking into quite strongly,” Trump told reporters on the South Lawn of the White House. “Ramps have treated me very unfairly.”​

​

The decision to probe the nation’s ramps came after a night of Trump feverishly retweeting anti-ramp conspiracy theories, including one claiming that George Soros had plotted to make American ramps steeper and slipperier than they were during Barack Obama’s Presidency.​

​

Trump told reporters that he was also considering signing an executive order requiring all ramps to have an incline of zero degrees, rendering them completely flat.​

​

“Those would be perfect ramps,” he said.​

​

Responding to this proposal, CNN’s Jim Acosta asked if, by making ramps flat, Trump would in effect be making the nation’s ramps no longer ramps at all.​

​

“You’re a terrible person,” Trump replied.​

Trump Orders Bill Barr to Investigate Nationâs Ramps

“It’s something we’re looking into quite strongly,” Trump told reporters. “Ramps have treated me very unfairly.”

www.newyorker.com

A 12:1 slope is the maximum slope allowed for a pedestrian ramp under the Americans with Disabilities Act regulations. That is, for every 12 inches of run, the maximum rise is 1 inch.

And the slope in that pic is clearly much steeper than that.

LoL!! The Doddering Dotard claimed the ramp was "slippery". Not EVEN. It was dry as could be on a bright, sunny day.
Please help him. He can't quite get a tiny plastic water cup up to his mouth without using two hands!

 

[Muhammed]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Arguing that “there’s something going on” with the nation’s sloping surfaces, Donald J. Trump has ordered Attorney General Bill Barr to launch a Department of Justice investigation into the United States’s vast collection of ramps.​

​

“It’s something we’re looking into quite strongly,” Trump told reporters on the South Lawn of the White House. “Ramps have treated me very unfairly.”​

​

The decision to probe the nation’s ramps came after a night of Trump feverishly retweeting anti-ramp conspiracy theories, including one claiming that George Soros had plotted to make American ramps steeper and slipperier than they were during Barack Obama’s Presidency.​

​

Trump told reporters that he was also considering signing an executive order requiring all ramps to have an incline of zero degrees, rendering them completely flat.​

​

“Those would be perfect ramps,” he said.​

​

Responding to this proposal, CNN’s Jim Acosta asked if, by making ramps flat, Trump would in effect be making the nation’s ramps no longer ramps at all.​

​

“You’re a terrible person,” Trump replied.​

Trump Orders Bill Barr to Investigate Nationâs Ramps

“It’s something we’re looking into quite strongly,” Trump told reporters. “Ramps have treated me very unfairly.”

www.newyorker.com

A 12:1 slope is the maximum slope allowed for a pedestrian ramp under the Americans with Disabilities Act regulations. That is, for every 12 inches of run, the maximum rise is 1 inch.

And the slope in that pic is clearly much steeper than that.

LoL!! The Doddering Dotard claimed the ramp was "slippery". Not EVEN. It was dry as could be on a bright, sunny day.
Please help him. He can't quite get a tiny plastic water cup up to his mouth without using two hands!

And he ate hot pizza with a fork and had 2 scoops of ice cream with his cake. OMG!!!

IMPEACH!!!

 

[DrLove]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Arguing that “there’s something going on” with the nation’s sloping surfaces, Donald J. Trump has ordered Attorney General Bill Barr to launch a Department of Justice investigation into the United States’s vast collection of ramps.​

​

“It’s something we’re looking into quite strongly,” Trump told reporters on the South Lawn of the White House. “Ramps have treated me very unfairly.”​

​

The decision to probe the nation’s ramps came after a night of Trump feverishly retweeting anti-ramp conspiracy theories, including one claiming that George Soros had plotted to make American ramps steeper and slipperier than they were during Barack Obama’s Presidency.​

​

Trump told reporters that he was also considering signing an executive order requiring all ramps to have an incline of zero degrees, rendering them completely flat.​

​

“Those would be perfect ramps,” he said.​

​

Responding to this proposal, CNN’s Jim Acosta asked if, by making ramps flat, Trump would in effect be making the nation’s ramps no longer ramps at all.​

​

“You’re a terrible person,” Trump replied.​

Trump Orders Bill Barr to Investigate Nationâs Ramps

“It’s something we’re looking into quite strongly,” Trump told reporters. “Ramps have treated me very unfairly.”

www.newyorker.com

A 12:1 slope is the maximum slope allowed for a pedestrian ramp under the Americans with Disabilities Act regulations. That is, for every 12 inches of run, the maximum rise is 1 inch.

And the slope in that pic is clearly much steeper than that.

LoL!! The Doddering Dotard claimed the ramp was "slippery". Not EVEN. It was dry as could be on a bright, sunny day.
Please help him. He can't quite get a tiny plastic water cup up to his mouth without using two hands!

And he ate hot pizza with a fork and had 2 scoops of ice cream with his cake. OMG!!!

IMPEACH!!!

Do you eat pizza with a fork too? I'm betting YES!!
Y'all should replace Pence with Caribou Barbie.
She was f'n FUNNNN!!

 

[Muhammed]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Arguing that “there’s something going on” with the nation’s sloping surfaces, Donald J. Trump has ordered Attorney General Bill Barr to launch a Department of Justice investigation into the United States’s vast collection of ramps.​

​

“It’s something we’re looking into quite strongly,” Trump told reporters on the South Lawn of the White House. “Ramps have treated me very unfairly.”​

​

The decision to probe the nation’s ramps came after a night of Trump feverishly retweeting anti-ramp conspiracy theories, including one claiming that George Soros had plotted to make American ramps steeper and slipperier than they were during Barack Obama’s Presidency.​

​

Trump told reporters that he was also considering signing an executive order requiring all ramps to have an incline of zero degrees, rendering them completely flat.​

​

“Those would be perfect ramps,” he said.​

​

Responding to this proposal, CNN’s Jim Acosta asked if, by making ramps flat, Trump would in effect be making the nation’s ramps no longer ramps at all.​

​

“You’re a terrible person,” Trump replied.​

Trump Orders Bill Barr to Investigate Nationâs Ramps

“It’s something we’re looking into quite strongly,” Trump told reporters. “Ramps have treated me very unfairly.”

www.newyorker.com

A 12:1 slope is the maximum slope allowed for a pedestrian ramp under the Americans with Disabilities Act regulations. That is, for every 12 inches of run, the maximum rise is 1 inch.

And the slope in that pic is clearly much steeper than that.

LoL!! The Doddering Dotard claimed the ramp was "slippery". Not EVEN. It was dry as could be on a bright, sunny day.
Please help him. He can't quite get a tiny plastic water cup up to his mouth without using two hands!

And he ate hot pizza with a fork and had 2 scoops of ice cream with his cake. OMG!!!

IMPEACH!!!

Do you eat pizza with a fork too? I'm betting YES!!

Sometimes, depending on what is prudent and pragmatic in the particular circumstances.

Although they may appear similar at first glance, a pizza that was freshly harvested from my brick oven, (that gets over 1200 Fahrenheit), is a very different animal, and must be treated much more cautiously, than a pizza that just came out of my refrigerator or went on a 10 mile road trip/cooling period, from some chain pizza joint who's ovens typically only maintain a temp of 600 degreesF on a good day.

If I'm hungry and I've got a super hot pizza, I'm going to use any tools and methods at my disposal necessary to eat it without burning my mouth.

If that means cutting off little pieces of pizza with a fork to speed the cooling process...consider it done.

And the best policy is to err on the side of caution, lest you get burned by a satanic pizza straight from the deepest depths of hell.

But apparently Democrats don't possess any fucking common sense whatsoever. And that's why somebody eating pizza with a fork leaves them completely flummoxed, confused and stupidly screaming orange man bad.

 

[Oddball]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Arguing that “there’s something going on” with the nation’s sloping surfaces, Donald J. Trump has ordered Attorney General Bill Barr to launch a Department of Justice investigation into the United States’s vast collection of ramps.​

​

“It’s something we’re looking into quite strongly,” Trump told reporters on the South Lawn of the White House. “Ramps have treated me very unfairly.”​

​

The decision to probe the nation’s ramps came after a night of Trump feverishly retweeting anti-ramp conspiracy theories, including one claiming that George Soros had plotted to make American ramps steeper and slipperier than they were during Barack Obama’s Presidency.​

​

Trump told reporters that he was also considering signing an executive order requiring all ramps to have an incline of zero degrees, rendering them completely flat.​

​

“Those would be perfect ramps,” he said.​

​

Responding to this proposal, CNN’s Jim Acosta asked if, by making ramps flat, Trump would in effect be making the nation’s ramps no longer ramps at all.​

​

“You’re a terrible person,” Trump replied.​

Trump Orders Bill Barr to Investigate Nationâs Ramps

“It’s something we’re looking into quite strongly,” Trump told reporters. “Ramps have treated me very unfairly.”

www.newyorker.com

 

[Wyatt earp]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Arguing that “there’s something going on” with the nation’s sloping surfaces, Donald J. Trump has ordered Attorney General Bill Barr to launch a Department of Justice investigation into the United States’s vast collection of ramps.​

​

“It’s something we’re looking into quite strongly,” Trump told reporters on the South Lawn of the White House. “Ramps have treated me very unfairly.”​

​

The decision to probe the nation’s ramps came after a night of Trump feverishly retweeting anti-ramp conspiracy theories, including one claiming that George Soros had plotted to make American ramps steeper and slipperier than they were during Barack Obama’s Presidency.​

​

Trump told reporters that he was also considering signing an executive order requiring all ramps to have an incline of zero degrees, rendering them completely flat.​

​

“Those would be perfect ramps,” he said.​

​

Responding to this proposal, CNN’s Jim Acosta asked if, by making ramps flat, Trump would in effect be making the nation’s ramps no longer ramps at all.​

​

“You’re a terrible person,” Trump replied.​

Trump Orders Bill Barr to Investigate Nationâs Ramps

“It’s something we’re looking into quite strongly,” Trump told reporters. “Ramps have treated me very unfairly.”

www.newyorker.com

A 12:1 slope is the maximum slope allowed for a pedestrian ramp under the Americans with Disabilities Act regulations. That is, for every 12 inches of run, the maximum rise is 1 inch.

And the slope in that pic is clearly much steeper than that.

LoL!! The Doddering Dotard claimed the ramp was "slippery". Not EVEN. It was dry as could be on a bright, sunny day.
Please help him. He can't quite get a tiny plastic water cup up to his mouth without using two hands!

And he ate hot pizza with a fork and had 2 scoops of ice cream with his cake. OMG!!!

IMPEACH!!!

Do you eat pizza with a fork too? I'm betting YES!!

Sometimes, depending on what is prudent and pragmatic in the particular circumstances.

A pizza that was freshly harvested from my brick oven, (that gets over 1200 Fahrenheit), is a very different animal than a pizza that just came out of my refrigerator or went on a 10 mile road trip/cooling period, from some chain pizza joint whose ovens typically only maintain a temp of 600 degreesF on a good day.

Chicago deep dish, you do need a fork

 

[Wyatt earp]

 

[DrLove]

View attachment 350723

Yowzer that's got too much damn crust.
I've been meaning to try the Papa Murphy's Take n Back crustless pizza.
You'd need a fork for that one too!

 

[miketx]

I wonder if these yammering idiots realize how stupid they make themselves look?

 

[anynameyouwish]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Arguing that “there’s something going on” with the nation’s sloping surfaces, Donald J. Trump has ordered Attorney General Bill Barr to launch a Department of Justice investigation into the United States’s vast collection of ramps.​

​

“It’s something we’re looking into quite strongly,” Trump told reporters on the South Lawn of the White House. “Ramps have treated me very unfairly.”​

​

The decision to probe the nation’s ramps came after a night of Trump feverishly retweeting anti-ramp conspiracy theories, including one claiming that George Soros had plotted to make American ramps steeper and slipperier than they were during Barack Obama’s Presidency.​

​

Trump told reporters that he was also considering signing an executive order requiring all ramps to have an incline of zero degrees, rendering them completely flat.​

​

“Those would be perfect ramps,” he said.​

​

Responding to this proposal, CNN’s Jim Acosta asked if, by making ramps flat, Trump would in effect be making the nation’s ramps no longer ramps at all.​

​

“You’re a terrible person,” Trump replied.​

Trump Orders Bill Barr to Investigate Nationâs Ramps

“It’s something we’re looking into quite strongly,” Trump told reporters. “Ramps have treated me very unfairly.”

www.newyorker.com

in particular he wants to know why HIS side of the ramp was so slippery while the OTHER side was perfectly fine!

I am reminded of an issue of MAD magazine....

2 pilots arguing in the cockpit

one says "i hope YOUR half of the plane CRASHES!"

 

[DrLove]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Arguing that “there’s something going on” with the nation’s sloping surfaces, Donald J. Trump has ordered Attorney General Bill Barr to launch a Department of Justice investigation into the United States’s vast collection of ramps.​

​

“It’s something we’re looking into quite strongly,” Trump told reporters on the South Lawn of the White House. “Ramps have treated me very unfairly.”​

​

The decision to probe the nation’s ramps came after a night of Trump feverishly retweeting anti-ramp conspiracy theories, including one claiming that George Soros had plotted to make American ramps steeper and slipperier than they were during Barack Obama’s Presidency.​

​

Trump told reporters that he was also considering signing an executive order requiring all ramps to have an incline of zero degrees, rendering them completely flat.​

​

“Those would be perfect ramps,” he said.​

​

Responding to this proposal, CNN’s Jim Acosta asked if, by making ramps flat, Trump would in effect be making the nation’s ramps no longer ramps at all.​

​

“You’re a terrible person,” Trump replied.​

Trump Orders Bill Barr to Investigate Nationâs Ramps

“It’s something we’re looking into quite strongly,” Trump told reporters. “Ramps have treated me very unfairly.”

www.newyorker.com

A 12:1 slope is the maximum slope allowed for a pedestrian ramp under the Americans with Disabilities Act regulations. That is, for every 12 inches of run, the maximum rise is 1 inch.

And the slope in that pic is clearly much steeper than that.

LoL!! The Doddering Dotard claimed the ramp was "slippery". Not EVEN. It was dry as could be on a bright, sunny day.
Please help him. He can't quite get a tiny plastic water cup up to his mouth without using two hands!

And he ate hot pizza with a fork and had 2 scoops of ice cream with his cake. OMG!!!

IMPEACH!!!

Do you eat pizza with a fork too? I'm betting YES!!

Sometimes, depending on what is prudent and pragmatic in the particular circumstances.

Although they may appear similar at first glance, a pizza that was freshly harvested from my brick oven, (that gets over 1200 Fahrenheit), is a very different animal, and must be treated much more cautiously, than a pizza that just came out of my refrigerator or went on a 10 mile road trip/cooling period, from some chain pizza joint who's ovens typically only maintain a temp of 600 degreesF on a good day.

If I'm hungry and I've got a super hot pizza, I'm going to use any tools and methods at my disposal necessary to eat it without burning my mouth.

If that means cutting off little pieces of pizza with a fork to speed the cooling process...consider it done.

And the best policy is to err on the side of caution, lest you get burned by a satanic pizza straight from the deepest depths of hell.

But apparently Democrats don't possess any fucking common sense whatsoever. And that's why somebody eating pizza with a fork leaves them completely flummoxed, confused and stupidly screaming orange man bad.

OR you could wait 2 or 3 minutes for it to cool. Face it, your Donald is just WEIRD!

 

[anynameyouwish]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Arguing that “there’s something going on” with the nation’s sloping surfaces, Donald J. Trump has ordered Attorney General Bill Barr to launch a Department of Justice investigation into the United States’s vast collection of ramps.​

​

“It’s something we’re looking into quite strongly,” Trump told reporters on the South Lawn of the White House. “Ramps have treated me very unfairly.”​

​

The decision to probe the nation’s ramps came after a night of Trump feverishly retweeting anti-ramp conspiracy theories, including one claiming that George Soros had plotted to make American ramps steeper and slipperier than they were during Barack Obama’s Presidency.​

​

Trump told reporters that he was also considering signing an executive order requiring all ramps to have an incline of zero degrees, rendering them completely flat.​

​

“Those would be perfect ramps,” he said.​

​

Responding to this proposal, CNN’s Jim Acosta asked if, by making ramps flat, Trump would in effect be making the nation’s ramps no longer ramps at all.​

​

“You’re a terrible person,” Trump replied.​

Trump Orders Bill Barr to Investigate Nationâs Ramps

“It’s something we’re looking into quite strongly,” Trump told reporters. “Ramps have treated me very unfairly.”

www.newyorker.com

A 12:1 slope is the maximum slope allowed for a pedestrian ramp under the Americans with Disabilities Act regulations. That is, for every 12 inches of run, the maximum rise is 1 inch.

And the slope in that pic is clearly much steeper than that.

LoL!! The Doddering Dotard claimed the ramp was "slippery". Not EVEN. It was dry as could be on a bright, sunny day.
Please help him. He can't quite get a tiny plastic water cup up to his mouth without using two hands!

And he ate hot pizza with a fork and had 2 scoops of ice cream with his cake. OMG!!!

IMPEACH!!!

Do you eat pizza with a fork too? I'm betting YES!!

Sometimes, depending on what is prudent and pragmatic in the particular circumstances.

Although they may appear similar at first glance, a pizza that was freshly harvested from my brick oven, (that gets over 1200 Fahrenheit), is a very different animal, and must be treated much more cautiously, than a pizza that just came out of my refrigerator or went on a 10 mile road trip/cooling period, from some chain pizza joint who's ovens typically only maintain a temp of 600 degreesF on a good day.

If I'm hungry and I've got a super hot pizza, I'm going to use any tools and methods at my disposal necessary to eat it without burning my mouth.

If that means cutting off little pieces of pizza with a fork to speed the cooling process...consider it done.

And the best policy is to err on the side of caution, lest you get burned by a satanic pizza straight from the deepest depths of hell.

But apparently Democrats don't possess any fucking common sense whatsoever. And that's why somebody eating pizza with a fork leaves them completely flummoxed, confused and stupidly screaming orange man bad.

" And the best policy is to err on the side of caution, lest you get burned by a satanic pizza straight from the deepest depths of hell. "

so you understand and agree with the coronavirus shutdown?

it was better to err on the side of caution rather than risk the death of millions.....

or do you?

 

[DrLove]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Arguing that “there’s something going on” with the nation’s sloping surfaces, Donald J. Trump has ordered Attorney General Bill Barr to launch a Department of Justice investigation into the United States’s vast collection of ramps.​

​

“It’s something we’re looking into quite strongly,” Trump told reporters on the South Lawn of the White House. “Ramps have treated me very unfairly.”​

​

The decision to probe the nation’s ramps came after a night of Trump feverishly retweeting anti-ramp conspiracy theories, including one claiming that George Soros had plotted to make American ramps steeper and slipperier than they were during Barack Obama’s Presidency.​

​

Trump told reporters that he was also considering signing an executive order requiring all ramps to have an incline of zero degrees, rendering them completely flat.​

​

“Those would be perfect ramps,” he said.​

​

Responding to this proposal, CNN’s Jim Acosta asked if, by making ramps flat, Trump would in effect be making the nation’s ramps no longer ramps at all.​

​

“You’re a terrible person,” Trump replied.​

Trump Orders Bill Barr to Investigate Nationâs Ramps

“It’s something we’re looking into quite strongly,” Trump told reporters. “Ramps have treated me very unfairly.”

www.newyorker.com

in particular he wants to know why HIS side of the ramp was so slippery while the OTHER side was perfectly fine!

I am reminded of an issue of MAD magazine....

2 pilots arguing in the cockpit

one says "i hope YOUR half of the plane CRASHES!"

The right hand side of that ramp was very unfair. Probably an Obama holdover!

 

[miketx]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Arguing that “there’s something going on” with the nation’s sloping surfaces, Donald J. Trump has ordered Attorney General Bill Barr to launch a Department of Justice investigation into the United States’s vast collection of ramps.​

​

“It’s something we’re looking into quite strongly,” Trump told reporters on the South Lawn of the White House. “Ramps have treated me very unfairly.”​

​

The decision to probe the nation’s ramps came after a night of Trump feverishly retweeting anti-ramp conspiracy theories, including one claiming that George Soros had plotted to make American ramps steeper and slipperier than they were during Barack Obama’s Presidency.​

​

Trump told reporters that he was also considering signing an executive order requiring all ramps to have an incline of zero degrees, rendering them completely flat.​

​

“Those would be perfect ramps,” he said.​

​

Responding to this proposal, CNN’s Jim Acosta asked if, by making ramps flat, Trump would in effect be making the nation’s ramps no longer ramps at all.​

​

“You’re a terrible person,” Trump replied.​

Trump Orders Bill Barr to Investigate Nationâs Ramps

“It’s something we’re looking into quite strongly,” Trump told reporters. “Ramps have treated me very unfairly.”

www.newyorker.com

A 12:1 slope is the maximum slope allowed for a pedestrian ramp under the Americans with Disabilities Act regulations. That is, for every 12 inches of run, the maximum rise is 1 inch.

And the slope in that pic is clearly much steeper than that.

LoL!! The Doddering Dotard claimed the ramp was "slippery". Not EVEN. It was dry as could be on a bright, sunny day.
Please help him. He can't quite get a tiny plastic water cup up to his mouth without using two hands!

And he ate hot pizza with a fork and had 2 scoops of ice cream with his cake. OMG!!!

IMPEACH!!!

Do you eat pizza with a fork too? I'm betting YES!!

Sometimes, depending on what is prudent and pragmatic in the particular circumstances.

Although they may appear similar at first glance, a pizza that was freshly harvested from my brick oven, (that gets over 1200 Fahrenheit), is a very different animal, and must be treated much more cautiously, than a pizza that just came out of my refrigerator or went on a 10 mile road trip/cooling period, from some chain pizza joint who's ovens typically only maintain a temp of 600 degreesF on a good day.

If I'm hungry and I've got a super hot pizza, I'm going to use any tools and methods at my disposal necessary to eat it without burning my mouth.

If that means cutting off little pieces of pizza with a fork to speed the cooling process...consider it done.

And the best policy is to err on the side of caution, lest you get burned by a satanic pizza straight from the deepest depths of hell.

But apparently Democrats don't possess any fucking common sense whatsoever. And that's why somebody eating pizza with a fork leaves them completely flummoxed, confused and stupidly screaming orange man bad.

OR you could wait 2 or 3 minutes for it to cool. Face it, your Donald is just WEIRD!

Or you could stop believing everything the media feeds you.

 

[Muhammed]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Arguing that “there’s something going on” with the nation’s sloping surfaces, Donald J. Trump has ordered Attorney General Bill Barr to launch a Department of Justice investigation into the United States’s vast collection of ramps.​

​

“It’s something we’re looking into quite strongly,” Trump told reporters on the South Lawn of the White House. “Ramps have treated me very unfairly.”​

​

The decision to probe the nation’s ramps came after a night of Trump feverishly retweeting anti-ramp conspiracy theories, including one claiming that George Soros had plotted to make American ramps steeper and slipperier than they were during Barack Obama’s Presidency.​

​

Trump told reporters that he was also considering signing an executive order requiring all ramps to have an incline of zero degrees, rendering them completely flat.​

​

“Those would be perfect ramps,” he said.​

​

Responding to this proposal, CNN’s Jim Acosta asked if, by making ramps flat, Trump would in effect be making the nation’s ramps no longer ramps at all.​

​

“You’re a terrible person,” Trump replied.​

Trump Orders Bill Barr to Investigate Nationâs Ramps

“It’s something we’re looking into quite strongly,” Trump told reporters. “Ramps have treated me very unfairly.”

www.newyorker.com

A 12:1 slope is the maximum slope allowed for a pedestrian ramp under the Americans with Disabilities Act regulations. That is, for every 12 inches of run, the maximum rise is 1 inch.

And the slope in that pic is clearly much steeper than that.

LoL!! The Doddering Dotard claimed the ramp was "slippery". Not EVEN. It was dry as could be on a bright, sunny day.
Please help him. He can't quite get a tiny plastic water cup up to his mouth without using two hands!

And he ate hot pizza with a fork and had 2 scoops of ice cream with his cake. OMG!!!

IMPEACH!!!

Do you eat pizza with a fork too? I'm betting YES!!

Sometimes, depending on what is prudent and pragmatic in the particular circumstances.

Although they may appear similar at first glance, a pizza that was freshly harvested from my brick oven, (that gets over 1200 Fahrenheit), is a very different animal, and must be treated much more cautiously, than a pizza that just came out of my refrigerator or went on a 10 mile road trip/cooling period, from some chain pizza joint who's ovens typically only maintain a temp of 600 degreesF on a good day.

If I'm hungry and I've got a super hot pizza, I'm going to use any tools and methods at my disposal necessary to eat it without burning my mouth.

If that means cutting off little pieces of pizza with a fork to speed the cooling process...consider it done.

And the best policy is to err on the side of caution, lest you get burned by a satanic pizza straight from the deepest depths of hell.

But apparently Democrats don't possess any fucking common sense whatsoever. And that's why somebody eating pizza with a fork leaves them completely flummoxed, confused and stupidly screaming orange man bad.

" And the best policy is to err on the side of caution, lest you get burned by a satanic pizza straight from the deepest depths of hell. "

so you understand and agree with the coronavirus shutdown?

it was better to err on the side of caution rather than risk the death of millions.....

or do you?

I understand it very well.

The reason for the abundance of precaution is to flatten the curve so that the hospitals don't get overwhelmed with more sick people than they possibly handle at one time.

It's killing our wise elders. That's disastrous for a civilization.

But of course flattening the curve necessarily means lengthening it. And you have to open it up sooner or later.