make your own "the most interesting man in the world" bits

[shart_attack]

The Statue of Liberty once took a tour of HIM.

 

[shart_attack]

His Fourth of July fireworks displays feature actual Patriot missiles.

 

[shart_attack]

World-renowned psychiatrists come to see him, just to lie down on his couch.

 

[shart_attack]

Pizza delivery guys tip HIM.

 

[shart_attack]

Hitchhikers give him the thumbs-up sign, purely out of respect.

 

[shart_attack]

He once streaked during a world championship soccer game — and was promptly escorted back ONTO the field by the authorities.

 

[Valerie]

^ making what is not my own, my own...

 

[shart_attack]

He once went to hell in a handbasket — and came back fully stitched.

 

[Valerie]

 

[Valerie]

 

[Valerie]

 

[Valerie]

 

[Valerie]

 

[shart_attack]

He actually convinced rocker Meat Loaf to do "that" for love.

 

[shart_attack]

Sometimes his voicemail calls him for conjugal advice.

 

[shart_attack]

He was once going to put on a cape, and leap the entirety of the world in a single bound, but he had to cancel because it would have interfered with his bowling tournament.

 

[shart_attack]

His nails do not grow, purely out of respect.

 

[Peach]

His nails do not grow, purely out of respect.

He doesn't speak unless spoken to, is a car mechanic, does plumbing and electrical work as hobbies.

 

[shart_attack]

When told to choose heads or tails, he chooses "neither" — and always wins.

 

[shart_attack]

He has found the Fountain of Youth — and says it's "a complete waste of time."