PoliticalChic
Diamond Member
A HELL OF AN ANSWER*
> >
> > The following is an actual question given on a University of Liverpool
> > chemistry final exam.
> > The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared
> > it with colleagues via the Internet, which is why we now have the
> > pleasure of enjoying it as well.
> >
> > Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs
> > heat)?
> >
> > Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's law
> > that gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed or some
> > variant.
> >
> > One student, however, wrote the following:
> >
> > First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we
> > need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate
> > at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once
> > a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave.. Therefore, no souls are
> > leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the
> > different religions that exist in the world today. Most of these
> > religions state that, if you are not a member of their religion, you
> > will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and
> > since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project
> > that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we
> > can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now,
> > we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell. Because Boyle's
> > Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to
> > stay constant, the volume of Hell must expand proportionately as souls
> > are added. This gives two possibilities:
> >
> > 1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls
> > enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase
> > until all Hell breaks loose.
> >
> > 2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in
> > Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes
> > over.
> >
> > So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Sandra
> > during my freshman year, that "it will be a cold day in Hell before I
> > sleep with you," and take into account the fact that I slept with her
> > last night, then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell
> > is endothermic and has already frozen over.. The corollary of this
> > theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not
> > accepting any more souls and is extinct.... leaving only Heaven,
> > thereby proving the existence of a divine being - which explains why,
> > last night, Sandra kept shouting "Oh my God."
> >
> >
> > THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY *"A".*
> >
> > The following is an actual question given on a University of Liverpool
> > chemistry final exam.
> > The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared
> > it with colleagues via the Internet, which is why we now have the
> > pleasure of enjoying it as well.
> >
> > Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs
> > heat)?
> >
> > Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's law
> > that gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed or some
> > variant.
> >
> > One student, however, wrote the following:
> >
> > First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we
> > need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate
> > at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once
> > a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave.. Therefore, no souls are
> > leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the
> > different religions that exist in the world today. Most of these
> > religions state that, if you are not a member of their religion, you
> > will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and
> > since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project
> > that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we
> > can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now,
> > we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell. Because Boyle's
> > Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to
> > stay constant, the volume of Hell must expand proportionately as souls
> > are added. This gives two possibilities:
> >
> > 1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls
> > enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase
> > until all Hell breaks loose.
> >
> > 2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in
> > Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes
> > over.
> >
> > So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Sandra
> > during my freshman year, that "it will be a cold day in Hell before I
> > sleep with you," and take into account the fact that I slept with her
> > last night, then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell
> > is endothermic and has already frozen over.. The corollary of this
> > theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not
> > accepting any more souls and is extinct.... leaving only Heaven,
> > thereby proving the existence of a divine being - which explains why,
> > last night, Sandra kept shouting "Oh my God."
> >
> >
> > THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY *"A".*
