USMB Coffee Shop IV

[Ringel05]

I'm older than you are and I guess I haven't reached that age.

But then we don't have a lot of clutter in our home, at least what I would call clutter. (Well, except for my desk that sometimes looks like a recycling bin exploded on it.) I try to keep it comfortable and livable if not a fashion statement.

I have a friend who is a hopeless hoarder with good stuff and crap in and out of boxes piled almost all the way to the ceiling in every room in the house with just a narrow path to her chair in front of the TV where she orders and orders and orders stuff until she is broke and borrowing from her friends for food. It's sad and dangerous but such people rarely know they have a problem much less are willing to ask for or accept help.

And I see that and I think I'm not so bad.

Mine's not nearly that bad but it's still more than I'd like, too much more than I'd like. My "guest room" is more storage than guest room and I haven't touched most of that in years. My garage is 2/3s full of junk that needs to go. Thought about building a shed but then why spend the money to store stuff I may never use.

 

[Foxfyre]

I'd argue that for many people it's not a question of age, but of environment. When you grow up poor, you look for ways to make do with what you can scrounge up. There are many books and videos about inexpensive stuff, even trash, to fix something instead of buying something else that is more expensive. And that mindset never leaves you, even later in life when you really don't have to but you do it anyway. Might be some psychological aspects in there somewhere for compulsive behavior, it's hard to give it up. Almost like throwing away all your underwear except for what you're wearing. You might need that underwear tomorrow. I'd feel pretty uncomfortable throwing out my boxes of stuff, like I would be somehow unprepared for the future. But I'm keeping my underwear drawer, so I ain't that far gone.

I think that might be a lot of it. Hombre and I didn't know we were poor while growing up but we both really were. And what little we had we treasured and protected and made do until it completely wore out and became unusable. Maybe it's that conditioning still in my psyche that makes it so hard to dispose of things that still have use even if we aren't using them. We have given tons of stuff away to Goodwill, Salvation Army, etc. but the the things kept are not really suitable for donations or I just am not ready to give them up.

That hoarder friend I mentioned? She grew up wealthy and remained quite financially comfortable most of her adult life. She could buy pretty much anything and everything she wanted and did. But one day something snapped and she started compulsively ordering things she would never use, most she never had even opened the boxes, and then hoarding both trash and the good stuff until she literally has no place to live other than her bed and where her chair sits in front of the TV. And she has devastated her finances doing this. I always wonder what causes this. It isn't a result of being poor. It just made her poor, even a beggar. Mental illness for sure. But why?

 

[Ringel05]

Just to be clear, what I choose to keep or get rid of is my business, what anyone else chooses to keep or get rid of is their business. I make no judgement of others if they don't do what I do.

 

[Ringel05]

I think that might be a lot of it. Hombre and I didn't know we were poor while growing up but we both really were. And what little we had we treasured and protected and made do until it completely wore out and became unusable. Maybe it's that conditioning still in my psyche that makes it so hard to dispose of things that still have use even if we aren't using them. We have given tons of stuff away to Goodwill, Salvation Army, etc. but the the things kept are not really suitable for donations or I just am not ready to give them up.

That hoarder friend I mentioned? She grew up wealthy and remained quite financially comfortable most of her adult life. She could buy pretty much anything and everything she wanted and did. But one day something snapped and she started compulsively ordering things she would never use, most she never had even opened the boxes, and then hoarding both trash and the good stuff until she literally has no place to live other than her bed and where her chair sits in front of the TV. And she has devastated her finances doing this. I always wonder what causes this. It isn't a result of being poor. It just made her poor, even a beggar. Mental illness for sure. But why?

Actually it's an emotional issue, typically hoarders do what they do to fill an emotional need. My late wife trusted things more than people, luckily she knew this and we kept it mostly in check.
After Kat died I started buying things to fill that hole. I'd order something I always wanted, excited waiting for it to arrive then quickly lose that excitment after it arrived and get excited again about buying something else. I've put a complete stop to that and have turned that focus towards my spiritual life, much more satisfying.

 

[Foxfyre]

Mine's not nearly that bad but it's still more than I'd like, too much more than I'd like. My "guest room" is more storage than guest room and I haven't touched most of that in years. My garage is 2/3s full of junk that needs to go. Thought about building a shed but then why spend the money to store stuff I may never use.

Yeah we

Just to be clear, what I choose to keep or get rid of is my business, what anyone else chooses to keep or get rid of is their business. I make no judgement of others if they don't do what I do.

I agree completely. But the pack rat syndrome or breaking it is fun or at least interesting to discuss.

 

[Foxfyre]

Just to be clear, what I choose to keep or get rid of is my business, what anyone else chooses to keep or get rid of is their business. I make no judgement of others if they don't do what I do.

I agree completely. And none of us are hoarders so far as I know. But the basic packrat syndrome is fun or at least interesting to discuss.

 

[task0778]

Packrat syndrome. Yeah, that's me. Some might call it an illness, I call it a hobby.

 

[Foxfyre]

Actually it's an emotional issue, typically hoarders do what they do to fill an emotional need. My late wife trusted things more than people, luckily she knew this and we kept it mostly in check.
After Kat died I started buying things to fill that hole. I'd order something I always wanted, excited waiting for it to arrive then quickly lose that excitment after it arrived and get excited again about buying something else. I've put a complete stop to that and have turned that focus towards my spiritual life, much more satisfying.

So you experienced a reactive depression which is completely normal after a significant loss like losing your beloved Kat. But it passed as you worked through the grief process and you regained your equilibrium. As you said an emotional compensation, quite normal if not 100% desirable. But not at all chronically destructive. Definitely not mental illness.

My hoarder friend started developing this problem even before she retired, not having had any trauma in her life, and it has been going on now for many years. I know both compulsive ordering and hoarding is a specific mental illness and also one that is extremely difficult to treat. It's frustrating that there is no practical way to intervene and get her help as the specialized help in this case probably doesn't even exist in Albuquerque or New Mexico.

 

[Foxfyre]

Packrat syndrome. Yeah, that's me. Some might call it an illness, I call it a hobby.

There ya go. That sounds a lot better.

 

[blackhawk]

 

[Hossfly]

 

[007]

I think the best coffee is made with an old fashioned percolator.

this is a Stanley percolator from walmart for $29.97. There are cheaper ones at half the price.


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My grandmal only made coffee by bringing a pan of water to a boil, dumping in coffee grounds and turning off the heat.

Well, I made some coffee in my medium sized percolator, and realized pretty quick I didn't put enough coffee in the basket. I don't care for strong coffee anyway so no great loss, but it does take more coffee than the drip maker to make the same strength coffee. As far as flavor, I'll have to try it again and use more coffee to make a good comparison.

 

[007]

Well, the last time we moved, I decided I'd never move again. It's nothing but work, and a big payday for a moving van company. However, I guess we could have had a big yard sale. It would have been a lot cheaper.

Me too. When I found my place here I was the happiest camper in the world, and I still love my home, and I had "thrown out the anchor" because I never wanted to move again. But here I am, thinking about it, and just because of the state of things here. There are huge problems with moving though, like not getting enough money for my home, and the price of homes where I would like to go selling for $500 to $750 a square foot, it's insane. So the chances of me moving any time soon are pretty slim, even if I want to, I'm not going to take a huge lose here and have to finance a huge chunk on a new home and have a mortgage with a massive, sky high interest rate. That just isn't going to happen.

 

[007]

You know I agree? Hombre and I started out with a good percolator and it made the best coffee. But for pure ease and convenience, we just use our good old Mr. Coffee machine now. And it does make a passable cup of coffee.

That's what I have, a Mr. Coffee. There's things I surely don't like about it though.

 

[Foxfyre]

That's sort of how I feel sometimes with all three. All three can be a form of communication, and Facebook I use to stay connected to friends and families scattered all over the country and a few outside the country, but there's an awful lot of waste of time there too.

 

[Foxfyre]

That's what I have, a Mr. Coffee. There's things I surely don't like about it though.

Our only real complaint is it doesn't keep the coffee hot enough, so we usually have to nuke it. But that 20 or 30 seconds in the microwave isn't all that big a deal.

 

[Foxfyre]

Me too. When I found my place here I was the happiest camper in the world, and I still love my home, and I had "thrown out the anchor" because I never wanted to move again. But here I am, thinking about it, and just because of the state of things here. There are huge problems with moving though, like not getting enough money for my home, and the price of homes where I would like to go selling for $500 to $750 a square foot, it's insane. So the chances of me moving any time soon are pretty slime, even if I want to, I'm not going to take a huge lose here and have to finance a huge chunk on a new home and have a mortgage with a massive, sky high interest rate. That just isn't going to happen.

For sure with all the pros and cons Wisconsin is in the top 20 best states to live in and 37th most expensive state meaning only 13 states are cheaper to live. And the real estate market is definitely a sellers market right now which is great if you're selling and not looking to relocate in which case you have to figure the higher cost where you're going might be more than the good price you got for your property.

The last house we sold we got a great price for it over what we paid for it and we bought a fixer upper in Albuquerque at well below the appraisal but that was 24 years ago. We probably wouldn't be able to move anywhere we would want to be as economically as just staying here.

And the cost of living here in Albuquerque, at least in our area, is not terribly expensive.

 

[007]

Our only real complaint is it doesn't keep the coffee hot enough, so we usually have to nuke it. But that 20 or 30 seconds in the microwave isn't all that big a deal.

Mine keeps the coffee plenty hot. The beef I have with mine is when you open the top lid, the water droplets run down and right into the basket and around the edge of it getting down under it, so it's always wet under the basket where it shouldn't be, it gets messy, and then there when I pour the water in it. For some weird reason, if I pour it too fast in a certain spot, it bubbles a little stream of water out of the spout, so I have to make sure I've put in a new filter and fresh coffee grounds. Other than that it's fine...

 

[Foxfyre]

Well it's 1 a.m. here and my melatonin and Tylenol PM just kicked in so I'm headed to bed. Have to take Aunt Betty to get her wrist xrayed tomorrow. She fell stepping down from a stool she was standing on and the wrist is still sore two weeks later so she wanted to be sure nothing serious there. The woman is 96. And I can't keep her from standing on stools or her couch to straighten a picture or climbing ladders. . .

Oh well. Good night darlinks.

 

[007]

I'll have to admit, I'm kind of a pack rat myself, but then I'm always working on something, either fixing or building. I love projects and always have something going. I have a ton of tools, wood, metal, welders, you name it, and I really love all that because it basically defines who and what I am, not to mention the considerable investment I have in them. I estimate I have $80K in tools in my triple bay Matco tool chest alone from my Harley Tech days, and that's hardly the half of it. If I sold all my tools, I'd probably weep to see them go. But I do keep all kinds of "stuff," and I absolutely do dig through it and find things to use, and when I do I'm glad I saved it, whatever that may be.