Is sex a human right?

[dilloduck]

It's a method of reproduction and an animal instinct, one which too few even resist. As I say, humans are just livestock.

It is a method of reproduction which is a chemically driven urge which is influenced by our psyche. Yes we have a right to try to reproduce and a myriad of other reasons. Masturbation is a form of sex and I doubt that right can be denied to anyone. Having sex with someone else, married or not, is not a right. The expectation that sex only occur in the confines of marriage and often enough to satisfy both partners may be convenient for society and artificially reduce competition, but it remains only an expectation unless the government decides to intervene.

 

[Cecilie1200]

Marriage is a contract and sex is part of that contract. Unless both parties agree that sex is no longer part of said contract then one party refusing is grounds for dissolving the contract. And the party refusing can be held liable for the failure of the marriage unless they can show just cause as to why they refused sex.

Weird .. you live in a weird world.

How? Go ahead and explain how a normal marriage is not a contract between two people that INCLUDES sex with each other.

And certainly the divorce courts think your spouse has a certain obligation to you sexually, since they will grant you a divorce for cause if you can show that he/she refused all sexual contact.

For a religious perspective, the Bible tells us that we have a duty to statisfy our spouses' sexual needs in order to aid them in remaining chaste and godly. Not that you always have to do it when they want whether you're interested or not, but that you make a reasonable effort to act as a barrier between them and sexual temptation.

 

[KittenKoder]

It's a method of reproduction and an animal instinct, one which too few even resist. As I say, humans are just livestock.

It is a method of reproduction which is a chemically driven urge which is influenced by our psyche. Yes we have a right to try to reproduce and a myriad of other reasons. Masturbation is a form of sex and I doubt that right can be denied to anyone. Having sex with someone else, married or not, is not a right. The expectation that sex only occur in the confines of marriage and often enough to satisfy both partners may be convenient for society and artificially reduce competition, but it remains only an expectation unless the government decides to intervene.

True. I cannot argue with that logic. But I would like to add that anyone getting into anything expecting sex to be given is pretty stupid, single minded, or morally corrupt. Any laws forcing another to have sex are wrong, period, and should be eradicated from our books.

 

[Cecilie1200]

it is not a right....it is a gift.....

True. But the law says that if your spouse denies sex for a year, that gives you the right to be divorced because you have been "constructively abandoned". So in a sense, you have a right to sex with your spouse. The frequency, manner... whole different story.

On the other hand, I wouldn't want to have sex with someone who saw sex as an "obligation". That would have to suck.

Depends. Do I want my husband to view sex in a general sense as a distasteful chore to be performed, like scooping the kitty litter? Of course not. Do I view it as a special and loving gift if he says, "I'm not really in the mood tonight, but I'd like to do something to satisfy you"?

It's all in the context of "obligation".

 

[elvis]

it is not a right....it is a gift.....

True. But the law says that if your spouse denies sex for a year, that gives you the right to be divorced because you have been "constructively abandoned". So in a sense, you have a right to sex with your spouse. The frequency, manner... whole different story.

On the other hand, I wouldn't want to have sex with someone who saw sex as an "obligation". That would have to suck.

Exactly. It's about as bad as not having sex at all.

 

[xsited1]

I didn't want to derail the "Cheating' thread so I thought I'd start this one to ask:

Is sex a human right? And I'd like to expand that to include: Can you expect sex from your partner if you are married?

So, whatcha think?

Only if you're a woman or a gay man (not that there's anything wrong with that!). Straight men... good luck with that.

 

[Andrew2382]

sex is a right and a wife giving her man a BJ 3 times a week should be a law

just my 2 cents

 

[elvis]

sex is a right and a wife giving her man a BJ 3 times a week should be a law

just my 2 cents

I have a feeling you're going to pay for that post.

 

[Amanda]

But I would like to add that anyone getting into anything expecting sex to be given is pretty stupid, single minded, or morally corrupt.

I know you have your issues with sex so I guess I can kinda see where you're coming from, but I think this is something that is going to be up to individual couples to figure out. Any LTR I'm in will eventually have sex and that is a given for me. If it's not a given for my guy we'll probably not make it as far as the having sex stage to begin with.

If I were married and something happened to make sex impossible that would be a very difficult thing for me to come to terms with, but I would make every effort to make things work. But I should add, it would have to be something pretty severe because I can think of a lot of ways to still have sexual intimacy even with most or all of the parts not working. I don't need intercourse to have intimacy, that's just 1 way to do it.

 

[KittenKoder]

But I would like to add that anyone getting into anything expecting sex to be given is pretty stupid, single minded, or morally corrupt.

I know you have your issues with sex so I guess I can kinda see where you're coming from, but I think this is something that is going to be up to individual couples to figure out. Any LTR I'm in will eventually have sex and that is a given for me. If it's not a given for my guy we'll probably not make it as far as the having sex stage to begin with.

If I were married and something happened to make sex impossible that would be a very difficult thing for me to come to terms with, but I would make every effort to make things work. But I should add, it would have to be something pretty severe because I can think of a lot of ways to still have sexual intimacy even with most or all of the parts not working. I don't need intercourse to have intimacy, that's just 1 way to do it.

Amanda ... you really should study to be a diplomat they could use you. Your side of the argument does make sense, just not my view, but yeah, it should be up to the people involved to decide, which was kinda my point. It shouldn't be a law and not everyone should be expected to be engaged in the act. It's because people expect this that so much in our culture is now sexualized.

 

[dilloduck]

But I would like to add that anyone getting into anything expecting sex to be given is pretty stupid, single minded, or morally corrupt.

I know you have your issues with sex so I guess I can kinda see where you're coming from, but I think this is something that is going to be up to individual couples to figure out. Any LTR I'm in will eventually have sex and that is a given for me. If it's not a given for my guy we'll probably not make it as far as the having sex stage to begin with.

If I were married and something happened to make sex impossible that would be a very difficult thing for me to come to terms with, but I would make every effort to make things work. But I should add, it would have to be something pretty severe because I can think of a lot of ways to still have sexual intimacy even with most or all of the parts not working. I don't need intercourse to have intimacy, that's just 1 way to do it.

Amanda ... you really should study to be a diplomat they could use you. Your side of the argument does make sense, just not my view, but yeah, it should be up to the people involved to decide, which was kinda my point. It shouldn't be a law and not everyone should be expected to be engaged in the act. It's because people expect this that so much in our culture is now sexualized.

If you don't want a law regarding having to have sex dont' get married and that's not even close to why our culture is so sexualized. ( I quit being diplomatic a few years back )

 

[driveby]

sex is a right and a wife giving her man a BJ 3 times a week should be a law

just my 2 cents

If you're expecting that, don't get married !

 

[strollingbones]

man/woman's strongest drive ...in order....thrist...hunger and sex....

 

[KittenKoder]

man/woman's strongest drive ...in order....thrist...hunger and sex....

So ... we are suppose to be nothing but mindless animals. Gotcha.

 

[dilloduck]

man/woman's strongest drive ...in order....thrist...hunger and sex....

We got the eating and the driking down pretty good !

 

[Amanda]

man/woman's strongest drive ...in order....thrist...hunger and sex....

So ... we are suppose to be nothing but mindless animals. Gotcha.

I don't think we're mindless but we're definitely animals. Being able to reason hasn't raised us that far above those that just run on instincts and memory.

 

[PoliticalChic]

But I would like to add that anyone getting into anything expecting sex to be given is pretty stupid, single minded, or morally corrupt.

I know you have your issues with sex so I guess I can kinda see where you're coming from, but I think this is something that is going to be up to individual couples to figure out. Any LTR I'm in will eventually have sex and that is a given for me. If it's not a given for my guy we'll probably not make it as far as the having sex stage to begin with.

If I were married and something happened to make sex impossible that would be a very difficult thing for me to come to terms with, but I would make every effort to make things work. But I should add, it would have to be something pretty severe because I can think of a lot of ways to still have sexual intimacy even with most or all of the parts not working. I don't need intercourse to have intimacy, that's just 1 way to do it.

Since there is a lot of differing thoughts on sex, this is definitely a topic that should be discussed prior to getting married. Some people think children are a given in a marriage, but not everyone feels that way.

 

[dilloduck]

man/woman's strongest drive ...in order....thrist...hunger and sex....

So ... we are suppose to be nothing but mindless animals. Gotcha.

I don't think we're mindless but we're definitely animals. Being able to reason hasn't raised us that far above those that just run on instincts and memory.

and it's SO damn hard for some of us to accept that !!

 

[Sky Dancer]

it is not a right....it is a gift.....

True. But the law says that if your spouse denies sex for a year, that gives you the right to be divorced because you have been "constructively abandoned". So in a sense, you have a right to sex with your spouse. The frequency, manner... whole different story.

On the other hand, I wouldn't want to have sex with someone who saw sex as an "obligation". That would have to suck.

Isn't this a bit contradictory? It translates to some as 'sex on demand'. If you don't have consensual sex in a marriage it's called marital rape. What do you folks this of this?:

"A marriage license does not require someone to submit to sexual contact on demand.

Everyone has the right to say "no" to any kind of sexual contact.

Forced sexual contact within a marriage or relationship is no different than if forced by a stranger.

Marital rape is agains the law in Illinois.

Marital rape is a serious crime.

In Illinois, if a person forces his/her spouse to have sexual intercourse without his/her partner's consent, it is sexual assault (rape).

A victim of marital rape has the right to report the crime to the police within 30 days of the assault."
http://www.asafeplaceforhelp.org/maritalrape.html

 

[Sky Dancer]

"In the English common law tradition, from which our legal doctrines and concepts have developed, a marriage was a contract based upon a voluntary private agreement by a man and a woman to become husband and wife. Marriage was viewed as the basis of the family unit and vital to the preservation of morals and civilization. Traditionally, the husband had a duty to provide a safe house, pay for necessities such as food and clothing, and live in the house. The wife's obligations were maintaining a home, living in the home, having sexual relations with her husband, and rearing the couple's children. Today the underlying concept that marriage is a legal contract still remains but due to changes in society the legal obligations are not the same.
Marriage | LII / Legal Information Institute


What are the legal obligations for husbands and wives today? Don't they vary from state to state?