MrG has passed.

[gipper]

They are all gone. All of them. I wish I could go too.

Hang in there Gracie. I know it’s cliche, but in time things will get better.

I’m certainly no expert, but I’ve lost a lot of people close to me. You need to find something to occupy your mind. Whether it’s a hobby or job, something that keeps your mind from reverting to grief and anger.

 

[B. Kidd]

They are all gone. All of them. I wish I could go too.

Muster the wherewithal to 'cowgirl up', please.

 

[strollingbones]

gracie does beautiful art....her painting is wonderful....it just hard to be happy and creative for her right now....it has not been that long for her...you dont get over a lifetime commitment in a few months....let her morn in her own time...just be here to listen not judge

 

[Hossfly]

They are all gone. All of them. I wish I could go too.

I'm still here Gracie and you can count on me any time.

 

[WinterBorn]

I'm having a really tough time lately. Tough. He was not supposed to die. He's supposed to be in his bed, propped up, watching tv. He's supposed to be here with me.

I don't have anyone else to say this to. So I will say it here.

Vent all you want. I think most people here welcome it.

If they don't, PM me and I'll listen.

 

[HereWeGoAgain]

I'm terrible at this stuff...
But hang in there,I know it sucks real bad right now but it will get better over time.
I lost my Dad when I was 16 and I thought I'd never get over it. Give it some time and you will to.

 

[Gracie]

It's just soothing knowing I can come here and write...like in a journal...my sorrow. I have snapped out of it again...but it will hit again eventually. Right now..I am doing ok. Took a few days, but I am so very stubborn, messy, sad, confused, lonely, and eventually is passes. Thanks you guys just for reading and validating my ups and downs. I'll be ok. Crazy Cat is now quite lovable and I now have another soul with me now.

Big hugs to your patience with me.

 

[task0778]

It's just soothing knowing I can come here and write...like in a journal...my sorrow. I have snapped out of it again...but it will hit again eventually. Right now..I am doing ok. Took a few days, but I am so very stubborn, messy, sad, confused, lonely, and eventually is passes. Thanks you guys just for reading and validating my ups and downs. I'll be ok. Crazy Cat is now quite lovable and I now have another soul with me now.

Big hugs to your patience with me.

Good to know you aren't alone, you got us and the cat.

 

[strollingbones]

YOU’RE THE GHOST
There’s a part of the grieving process,
where your soul kind of leaves your body too.
As though it’s off searching for the one you lost,
somewhere in the ether.
You walk around,
doing all the right things,
putting one foot in front of the other,
living,
but it’s really as though you’re the ghost.
Perhaps you are.
Perhaps your soul searches,
until you find the one you miss,
and they tell you to go back and live.
So, when that numbness passes brave one,
maybe it’s time to do what you are told,
go back and live,
twice as hard.
You don’t belong there in the ether,
nor do you need to search for the one you lost,
they find you.
And when they do, you’ll feel it.
Donna Ashworth
From ‘I Wish I knew’
https://amzn.to/3JVMJlZ
Art by Amanda Cass #amandacassart
#griefpoetry #griefquotes #griefsupport #griefpoem #donnaashworth








https://www.facebook.com/NCgovernor...WigxA0q7DvRxmHXO2KZpNz2al0FIGY1&__tn__=<<,P-R

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https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbi...WigxA0q7DvRxmHXO2KZpNz2al0FIGY1&__tn__=EH-y-R

 

[task0778]

There are many who believe that death is not final, except in a physical sense and that in some way we will be reunited with our loved ones who have passed. Maybe that is true and maybe not, but it gives me comfort to think so and maybe it will for you too. Some even believe we live many lives rather than only one, lives that we share with the same others we shared this one with, albeit in a different relationship.

 

[strollingbones]

 

[Gracie]

I may have found a new place further north. Small hamlet town of about 223 people, give or take. Near Corning Ca....which is another small town....and further down the road about half an hour is Red Bluff. Working out details now. I'd like to have it, but only if its like a 10 year lease or something. Owner accepts HUD, which is what I have now living here where I am currently. Big empty building in front that used to be a small grocery store, then a church, then a community hall. Owner tried to sell but finally gave up and he and his wife moved to Florida and want to rent out the small apt in the back of the building. It has major potential to be a comfy forever home, but only if he does not try to sell it again later on and I have to move AGAIN. I will be 70 in October...and moving this time will be just me doing it. So....waiting word from the owner what length of lease he is open to, will he try to sell again eventually, what utilities does he pay if any, etc. I saw pics of the outside..but not the inside. My friend lives next door to the building, and took pics for me. Wish I had the money...I'd buy the place and make the front portion into a very small thrift/country store sort of place where the locals can quilt, sell homemade jams and jellies, maybe some fresh produce, and odds and ends donated i.e. end tables, small farm equipment and things of that nature..or do it as a community gathering place for arts and crafts. Alas, I don't know what the value is of the place but plan to go see if I can find it on Zillow or Realtor websites. Pics on google show it before he painted the whole place and the very cute looking apt in the back.

It would be nice to get it as a HUD property and have the whole thing instead of just the apt, since the owner MIGHT eventually rent out the hall itself and I have no desire to live behind a saloon, lol.

 

[gtopa1]

They are all gone. All of them. I wish I could go too.

Hi Gracie.

"I wish I could go too."

That would be the saddest loss of all.

All that love in your life; you have been blessed. It stays with you forever.

Greg

 

[jackflash]

View attachment 601511

I will carry on the best I can, dear Dennis. Be with those who loved you that are already there. And breathe deep with fresh new lungs.

I am devastated.

This is truly a heartbreak Gracie, so sorry for your loss.

 

[RetiredGySgt]

Sorry I did not respond when I saw this the first time. I dont do death well. With time it will get better I have lost a nephew as a baby my mom and dad and my daughter lost a baby boy he was born to soon and died, also my grandparent which were like my mom and dad. I got over them all with time. You never forget and the pain gets dull and you move on. Sorry for your loss and hope you are doing better now.

 

[task0778]

I have no desire to live behind a saloon, lol.

Well, if this happens you might meet some of us passed out behind the bar, maybe even a mod or 2.

 

[AyeCantSeeYou]

I'm having a really tough time lately. Tough. He was not supposed to die. He's supposed to be in his bed, propped up, watching tv. He's supposed to be here with me.

I don't have anyone else to say this to. So I will say it here.

Something I do from time to time when the pain from my daughter's death gets overwhelming, is to write a letter to her. Sometimes it's several paragraphs long, other times it's just a few sentences, and occasionally just one sentence or a few words. If you want, start a thread for letters to Mr. G.

 

[Gracie]

Something I do from time to time when the pain from my daughter's death gets overwhelming, is to write a letter to her. Sometimes it's several paragraphs long, other times it's just a few sentences, and occasionally just one sentence or a few words. If you want, start a thread for letters to Mr. G.

That, I cannot do. I am too full of guilt, it would depress me more than I already am. He did some rotten things during our marriage. Rotten. Cruel. Selfish. But he tried so hard to make up for it, and I couldn't forgive it. Or wouldn't. It wasn't until his last day on this earth that that anger I held on to, fled like his life did. And now I am crying again, because I keep seeing his blue eyes looking at me behind that oxygen mask and him saying "no guilt, honeybunner". Easier said than done. I will live with it forever.

I keep asking him to come to me..to let me know he forgives me..that he is safe, happy, with loved ones in heaven. He hasn't. Except once and that was about 3 weeks ago, in a dream. Instead of waking up crying like I usually do..this time, I woke myself up laughing. He was there.....looking at me...no mask this time...and making faces while on the phone because he didn't want to talk to whomever it was yakking in his ear and it was just so darn funny...I busted up. Its been so long since I laughed a real laugh, from the belly with guffaws....so when I did it in that dream, it woke me up with me busting up to an empty apt. I'd like to think he was letting me know he was doing fine and trying to cheer me up...but....it was just a dream and wishful thinking.

 

[task0778]

That, I cannot do. I am too full of guilt, it would depress me more than I already am. He did some rotten things during our marriage. Rotten. Cruel. Selfish. But he tried so hard to make up for it, and I couldn't forgive it. Or wouldn't. It wasn't until his last day on this earth that that anger I held on to, fled like his life did. And now I am crying again, because I keep seeing his blue eyes looking at me behind that oxygen mask and him saying "no guilt, honeybunner". Easier said than done. I will live with it forever.

I keep asking him to come to me..to let me know he forgives me..that he is safe, happy, with loved ones in heaven. He hasn't. Except once and that was about 3 weeks ago, in a dream. Instead of waking up crying like I usually do..this time, I woke myself up laughing. He was there.....looking at me...no mask this time...and making faces while on the phone because he didn't want to talk to whomever it was yakking in his ear and it was just so darn funny...I busted up. Its been so long since I laughed a real laugh, from the belly with guffaws....so when I did it in that dream, it woke me up with me busting up to an empty apt. I'd like to think he was letting me know he was doing fine and trying to cheer me up...but....it was just a dream and wishful thinking.

I dunno, maybe more than just a dream. You asked him to come to you and maybe he did. Don't discredit it.

Guilt is a bitch. I have to deal with it often and I'm sure everyone else does too if they have an ounce of humility. And forgiveness ain't easy either, but sometimes just saying out loud "I forgive you" helps me so maybe it'll help you. For me it was my dad, he was one mean son of a bitch. He had a hard life though, so I kinda understand now where it came from.

 

[AyeCantSeeYou]

That, I cannot do. I am too full of guilt, it would depress me more than I already am. He did some rotten things during our marriage. Rotten. Cruel. Selfish. But he tried so hard to make up for it, and I couldn't forgive it. Or wouldn't. It wasn't until his last day on this earth that that anger I held on to, fled like his life did. And now I am crying again, because I keep seeing his blue eyes looking at me behind that oxygen mask and him saying "no guilt, honeybunner". Easier said than done. I will live with it forever.

I keep asking him to come to me..to let me know he forgives me..that he is safe, happy, with loved ones in heaven. He hasn't. Except once and that was about 3 weeks ago, in a dream. Instead of waking up crying like I usually do..this time, I woke myself up laughing. He was there.....looking at me...no mask this time...and making faces while on the phone because he didn't want to talk to whomever it was yakking in his ear and it was just so darn funny...I busted up. Its been so long since I laughed a real laugh, from the belly with guffaws....so when I did it in that dream, it woke me up with me busting up to an empty apt. I'd like to think he was letting me know he was doing fine and trying to cheer me up...but....it was just a dream and wishful thinking.

That dream wasn't "wishful thinking". Mr. G. actually visited you! His message was clear and I hope you take it to heart. He wants you to be happy and to hear you laugh.

I do understand more than you know about looking at pictures and seeing reminders of a loved one and breaking down. It happens to me all the time, just this morning before leaving to go to work. I saw one of my daughter's bracelets in my bathroom and that's all it took ...

Just know that when you have a dream about him that is vivid and clear, it is definitely him visiting you.