I'll take a shot.
America is a God-fearing nation founded on the immutable principles of Christianity. Our Constitution has its roots deep in Christ, deep as nine-inch-nails, so therefore a devout Christian is the most capable of understanding and upholding said principles.
Barack Hussien Obama not only sounds like one of those sand ****** names, but he was also raised for a time in Indonesia, the worlds largest Muslim country. And there's a picture of him wearing a turban, or something. Maybe it was a bath towel, but probably not because that wouldn't fit my narrative here.
Also, the "church" he went to for twenty-something years isn't really a church, even though it preaches salvation through Jesus Christ and worships the same Judeo-Christian God as other sects of Christianity. It's really just a racist hate cult. That's completely my unformed opinion that has been created by fear-mongering media sources, but for the sake of my narrative I'll assert it as fact.
Continuing my narrative, it's way more easy to believe he's a Muslim. He looks like one. There's pictures, and his name. It all fits into place too perfectly. And since he's a Muslim, that means he *hearts* Sharia law. And, of course, Sharia law is incompatable with Western civilization--I read that on a blog somewhere--so it stands to reason that Obama is really just phase one of the Muslim's evil plan for world domination.
It's important to understand that he's a Muslim, because that way we will be better prepared for The Crusades v2.0, where the final battle scene between Raptor Jesus and SuperMohammed will be judged by the four horsemen. Or something like that.
How'd I do?
