Is Mortimer in any way "jewish"?

Start practicing Judaism and there you go.

Actually, that's not the way it works. There are many people, Seventh Day Adventists and Messianic xtians for example, who practices some Jewish rituals, but they are in no way Jews or any part of the Jewish community.
You just need a nose job to make it a lot bigger, and coke-bottle glasses. Fucking your wife through a hole in a sheet is optional.
 

Becoming Jewish is, as you realize, a significant and life-changing event. It is not a small matter by any means.

But before you start, consider a few things. When a Gentile wants to become Jewish, the Rabbis are required to try to dissuade him. Only the very sincere make it through the entire process. And the process can take a long while. It may not turn out to be easy.
ribz.jpg
 
Last week Mortimer was playing dress up as a priest. Now he's Jewish? Oy.
Maybe his Christian brotherhood symposium didn´t work out so well. I guess Morty is in a serious identity crisis, shifting between white nationalist and Jew, Nazi and Gypsy. I told him he shouldn´t mind.
 
What I am trying to say though is that anyone can become Jewish.

Anyone can TRY.

I know sincere people who have tried and failed.

I guess it depends if they like you are not.

No, that has nothing to do with it. It depends, very much, on your reasons for doing it.

A common reason that will disqualify you is wanting to convert only to be able to claim an ethnic heritage for your own.

Many people begin the conversion process with the idea that the Jewish community will somehow bring them a new (and better) identity than they had before. Conversion to Judaism requires more sincerity than just the desire to reinvent your heritage.

Interesting. On a side note, my mom thinks she's is Jewish. She even celebrates the New moons and the Feast of Tabernacle. I say she is mad/loco. :D

I'm curious as to why she would choose those particular celebrations

Rosh chodesh (the first day of every Hebrew month or "new moon") is hardly a holiday. It rates only a single added line to the daily prayers.

And Sukkot, while a fun holiday, isn't exactly a high holy day.

One of the reasons it's difficult for a born Jew, and impossible for a converted Jew, to lead a Jewish life without a Jewish community is that many traditions are passed on from the community, they can't be learned in isolation.
You cannot be a Jewish male unless a Rabbi does your circumcision with his teeth.

Damned I didn't notice that poor infants face. no wonder Jews are so cranky.
 

Becoming Jewish is, as you realize, a significant and life-changing event. It is not a small matter by any means.

But before you start, consider a few things. When a Gentile wants to become Jewish, the Rabbis are required to try to dissuade him. Only the very sincere make it through the entire process. And the process can take a long while. It may not turn out to be easy.
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Damned that deserves special recognition.........................BAWWWWHAHA.lolol
 
It is not part of my documented family tree or in any way part of my identity. None of my ancestors is in a jewish cemetery, or celebrated hannukah once at all, I have no idea about jewish ancestry.

Yet I score 1.5% Jewish on 23andMe, 23andMe is known to have a very good jewish algorithm, that means if 23andme tells you, you are 1.5% Jewish likely you do have a trace of jewish in your DNA.

A user about my jewish dna

1.5% is small and distant as hell, it's not surprising at all you don't know about Jewish ancestors. It means you are 1/64 Ashkenazi. That would mean you had one Jewish ancestor (out of the 64) 6 generations ago. Most people no idea how their ancestors identified 5-6 generations ago, neither do I.

Now Im curious about opinions of jews here. Is Mortimer in any way even remotely jewish?


Ashke-NAZI.jpg
You'll know you're Jewish if you can talk 23andMe down to 1.2%.
 
It is not part of my documented family tree or in any way part of my identity. None of my ancestors is in a jewish cemetery, or celebrated hannukah once at all, I have no idea about jewish ancestry.

Yet I score 1.5% Jewish on 23andMe, 23andMe is known to have a very good jewish algorithm, that means if 23andme tells you, you are 1.5% Jewish likely you do have a trace of jewish in your DNA.

A user about my jewish dna

1.5% is small and distant as hell, it's not surprising at all you don't know about Jewish ancestors. It means you are 1/64 Ashkenazi. That would mean you had one Jewish ancestor (out of the 64) 6 generations ago. Most people no idea how their ancestors identified 5-6 generations ago, neither do I.

Now Im curious about opinions of jews here. Is Mortimer in any way even remotely jewish?


Ashke-NAZI.jpg
You'll know you're Jewish if you can talk 23andMe down to 1.2%.
480px-Linda_Avey_in_2008.jpg
 

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