Your Thoughts.

[gallantwarrior]

I told her to come home. I would find a hole for her in this house. She refuses and says she needs to stay there. But...if she doesn't find a damn good job soon, AND a roomie, she will not be able to afford living there. Joe's boss pays the rent as part of Joe's pay. Since Joe no longer is living there...it's only a matter of time before the rent is stopped being paid. Joe is settled in the shop back room.
It's a mess. And I don't dare say anything. She will get pissed off at ME for making her see the proverbial light.

Get her to come to your hole, Gracie. But be aware, adopting strays may come with a price.

 

[Gracie]

She has lived with me a few times, actually. Once, when her mother died (her mom and I were best friends), then again after she got married to "Joe". They live in LA now.
I told her to come home. She knows she can if that is what she chooses to do.

 

[gallantwarrior]

She has lived with me a few times, actually. Once, when her mother died (her mom and I were best friends), then again after she got married to "Joe". They live in LA now.
I told her to come home. She knows she can if that is what she chooses to do.

You a good soul, Gracie (Is there a PM mode in this new format?)

 

[Gracie]

Yes, it's called a "conversation" now. Eye roll.
And thank you, hon. I try to be a good friend. But I know better than to get involved in marital matters. Oy.

 

[Scorpion]

It all comes down to whether she is better with him or without him.
Only SHE can make that ultimate decision.

 

[Gracie]

I guess when I emailed that I felt between a rock and hard place and not sure whether to give an opinion or not...it pissed her off. She can be prickly. Still no response to my earlier email. Which means one of two things...she is angry with me or....he is back in the house and she doesn't want to tell me because she is leary of what I might say. So..I plan to just leave her alone and let her contact ME. And when she does...I will just pass over any comments she makes about Joe. Stick to the weather sorta thing.

 

[Noomi]

Joe is a bastard who needs to be kicked to the kerb.

 

[mudwhistle]

Some men cheat because the wife isn't doing what they like in bed. Others cheat because it's available. Either way, it's still wrong. I figure when Joe, or whatever his name is gets about 50 he'll realize how stupid he was and wish it never happened. As it is, I suggest you stay out of it, because this sort of thing cannot be fixed by talking about it. This is about more than just cheating.

 

[Gracie]

Joe is 58 years old.
Still no word from Jane. Meh. Ok. I'm done. If she wants to talk..she knows where I am.

 

[saveliberty]

Joe is 58 years old.
Still no word from Jane. Meh. Ok. I'm done. If she wants to talk..she knows where I am.

Funny, I was just going to say that to you.

 

[Gracie]

Still silence on her end. Okey dokey.

 

[Disir]

Sometimes people are humiliated by the choices that they make or are making. There are women and men that are more afraid of being alone.

 

[Gracie]

I really think that is the case. She is afraid of being alone. She already told me that many times..even before she married Joe.

 

[Gracie]

Well...I sent her a mundane email telling her about my doc visit today and how the weather is. She responded that she is very depressed and is going to give Joe a couple of weeks to decide on what he is going to do. Then if he chooses to stay away, she will either give notice where she lives or rent out the room if she can find a decent roomie. She also said she wants to come visit and I said "come on". I didn't say anything else.

So...that is where it is right now. And I sat on my hands.

 

[Sherry]

If he cheated once, he'll do it again..............They will never be the same..........end it.

When trust is broken, it is very difficult to repair...without trust, a relationship will not survive.

 

[JOSweetHeart]

To me, there is a reason why a person decides to cheat and because they go ahead and do the cheating, they can always cheat again later. Also according to what is said about the ex, it was just a roll in the hay for them, nothing more which sounds like a disappointment for the guy, so he goes back to who he is married to. If she wants to get divorced from him, I can not blame her when he made it as clear as glass that she was not enough for him anymore. Going back to his wife because he can't have who it is that he really wants in my opinion would be a sheer insult to his wife.

God bless you always!!!

Holly

 

[g5000]

For the record...Jane is not me. This is a friend of mine. I have been biting my tongue to NOT say what I think.

And keep biting your tongue. Stay the hell out of it. If you give her advice, and she follows it, and everything goes to shit, she will blame YOU.

Stay out of it.