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lolFAKE NOOZ!!!!
Woke is broke eh?
Anheuser Busch CEO Resigns As Bud Light Sales Plummet To Record Low
The blunder could be the worst disaster in advertising history.dunning-kruger-times.com
The shakeup at Anheuser Busch continues in the wake of what may have been the dumbest thing a company could ever conceivably do. CEO Augustus Anheuser III left the corporate headquarters in shame after tendering his resignation.
“The whole thing is ultimately my fault,” said Anheuser, “I should have never approved that campaign.”
The company also fired the entire marketing department responsible for the whole mess. Vice President and Interim CEO Joe Barron says they have a long way to go to regain the public’s trust.
“We’ll have to be vigilant and make sure our advertising is acceptable for all. The cancel culture left is always looking for a reason to take a brand out, so catering to them didn’t make a lot of sense.”
The company is also in talks with Nike, Yeti, Coca-Cola, and Disney to find out how they recovered from the devastating boycotts of patriotic Americans. “I plan to join the group therapy sessions on Tuesdays,” said Barron.
Anheuser Busch will likely lose tens of millions this quarter and there’s a chance they’ll stop producing Bud Light altogether if things get any worse.
“Travis Tritt called for our demise,” said Barron, “there are powerful voices at play. Between him and Kid Rock who knows if we’ll survive at all.”
Let’s hope not, patriots. Go woke go broke. God Bless America.
You are jumping through some big hoops. You love that idiot. Confess.Why would I do that?
Are you mad because he went up against a tranny lover like you?
Nope.
Bud is pisswater which I'm sure you're familiar with.
You are jumping through some big hoops. You love that idiot. Confess.
To me beer is situational. Bad beer can have it's place, unlike bad wine which never has it's place.
When I go camping I do bring some nice micro-brews, but I also bring a 30 pack of Busch for beer pong, and to drink when playing Cornhole or Can Jam (we enforce the "one hand holds a beer" rule for both games).
Fuck off Mr ProjectorSorry,unlike you I dont love men.
I do however enjoy his political views.
Fuck off Mr Projector
Woke is broke eh?
Anheuser Busch CEO Resigns As Bud Light Sales Plummet To Record Low
The blunder could be the worst disaster in advertising history.
The shakeup at Anheuser Busch continues in the wake of what may have been the dumbest thing a company could ever conceivably do. CEO Augustus Anheuser III left the corporate headquarters in shame after tendering his resignation.
“The whole thing is ultimately my fault,” said Anheuser, “I should have never approved that campaign.”
The company also fired the entire marketing department responsible for the whole mess. Vice President and Interim CEO Joe Barron says they have a long way to go to regain the public’s trust.
“We’ll have to be vigilant and make sure our advertising is acceptable for all. The cancel culture left is always looking for a reason to take a brand out, so catering to them didn’t make a lot of sense.”
The company is also in talks with Nike, Yeti, Coca-Cola, and Disney to find out how they recovered from the devastating boycotts of patriotic Americans. “I plan to join the group therapy sessions on Tuesdays,” said Barron.
Anheuser Busch will likely lose tens of millions this quarter and there’s a chance they’ll stop producing Bud Light altogether if things get any worse.
“Travis Tritt called for our demise,” said Barron, “there are powerful voices at play. Between him and Kid Rock who knows if we’ll survive at all.”
Let’s hope not, patriots. Go woke go broke. God Bless America.
Well, Bud Light has always been horsepiss.Complete horseshit -
You're in Florida right?LOL...says the homo leftist who projected first.
Another leftist hypocrite who can dish it out but cant take it.
You're in Florida right?
You're just an old man with a big mouth in shitty diapers. Right?
Well done satire and apparently convincing enough that a lot of MSM sources feel the need to rebut it.Woke is broke eh?
Anheuser Busch CEO Resigns As Bud Light Sales Plummet To Record Low
The blunder could be the worst disaster in advertising history.
The shakeup at Anheuser Busch continues in the wake of what may have been the dumbest thing a company could ever conceivably do. CEO Augustus Anheuser III left the corporate headquarters in shame after tendering his resignation.
“The whole thing is ultimately my fault,” said Anheuser, “I should have never approved that campaign.”
The company also fired the entire marketing department responsible for the whole mess. Vice President and Interim CEO Joe Barron says they have a long way to go to regain the public’s trust.
“We’ll have to be vigilant and make sure our advertising is acceptable for all. The cancel culture left is always looking for a reason to take a brand out, so catering to them didn’t make a lot of sense.”
The company is also in talks with Nike, Yeti, Coca-Cola, and Disney to find out how they recovered from the devastating boycotts of patriotic Americans. “I plan to join the group therapy sessions on Tuesdays,” said Barron.
Anheuser Busch will likely lose tens of millions this quarter and there’s a chance they’ll stop producing Bud Light altogether if things get any worse.
“Travis Tritt called for our demise,” said Barron, “there are powerful voices at play. Between him and Kid Rock who knows if we’ll survive at all.”
Let’s hope not, patriots. Go woke go broke. God Bless America.
Same thing IMO.Can you read?
(It should be noted however that the absurdity that the situations exist at all gives a lot of ammo for satire.)
babylonbee.com
Same thing IMO.
You're from the land of queers and steers.
Why would I move to a shithole like Texas? I'm not going anywhere. I live in paradise.The place where all of you yankees and californians are moving to yes.
It's funny that you always claim to be smarter yet your buddies are bailing on your shitty cities and moving to the south.
