Was Christ faking it when he was crucified?

[hangover]

I can't get past the first part. There was no boat capable of taking 2 of every animal on the planet. And there's no proof an invisible being took 6 days to make the world... no proof either that humans lived to be 800 or whatever Noah lived to.

Alien theorists think that aliens gave Noah the DNA of every animal, both male and female. Then reconstituted them after the flood...like instant oatmeal. All that DNA would fit on a boat.

And one of God's days could be a couple hundred thousand years. Our days are 24 hours because the earth spins. Maybe God travels around the universe instead of the sun. How long does that take?

And think about how fast humans travel, spinning around the sun every year. How many millions of miles is it around the sun once a year? Even if you never leave the house, you're still traveling thousands of miles an hour. No wonder humans are so dizzy.

You shouldn't be drinking this early in the day.

Bummer dude.

 

[Bumberclyde]

Believers are told=we will know when jesus is at the door ready to return!!! That day is today!!!!

That was yesterday. So what's Jesus like? Does he use deodorant?

 

[hangover]

Believers are told=we will know when jesus is at the door ready to return!!! That day is today!!!!

If you keep saying that everyday, someday you'll eventually be right....if you live long enough.

 

[GISMYS]

GOD HAS SOME WORDS FOR YOU MOCKERS AND SCOFFERS!!! The Coming Day of the Lord

3 Know this first of all, that in the last days mockers will come with their mocking, following after their own lusts, 4 and saying, “Where is the promise of His coming? For ever since the fathers fell asleep, all continues just as it was from the beginning of creation.” 5 For when they maintain this, it escapes their notice that by the word of God the heavens existed long ago and the earth was formed out of water and by water, 6 through which the world at that time was destroyed, being flooded with water. 7 But by His word the present heavens and earth are being reserved for fire, kept for the day of judgment and destruction of ungodly men.

8 But do not let this one fact escape your notice, beloved, that with the Lord one day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years like one day. 9 The Lord is not slow about His promise, as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing for any to perish but for all to come to repentance.

 

[Luddly Neddite]

First off, let me say that I believe the story of Christ is meant to inspire us to be better people. Take the sermon on the mount to heart and let is guide your daily lives. It doesn't matter if he was real or not, follow his teachings on unconditional love and tolerance and you'll be a better person and lead a more purposeful life.

However...

I was thinking about the gospels the other day, everything that we are told about Christ specifically the super-hero powers he had to produce food, raise the dead, and cure the sick.

It's possible that on Good Friday (which was really a shitty day), that Christ didn't really feel any pain at all. He was just putting on a show for all his followers.

Showmanship means you finish big and leave them wanting more. You create suspense and drama, then have a big twist at the end. He has all these super powers and magic abilities but he didn't like showing off too much and only used his powers when needed to really convince people he was the real deal. It may have served his purpose to appear to be in pain and agony when he was really feeling nothing at all. Then, when the dust settled, he just gets up and flies away, making sure a few people see him. M. Night Shamalan couldn't cook up a better twist then that. Although, it would have been better if all of Rome had seen Christ fly up in the air like Kal-El, and he could have thrown the cross he was crucified on right through Pilate's roof and then swooped down on Herod, picked him and dropped him in the Sea.

I hope that Christ used his magic powers to make sure the others being crucified on the same day, the thieves, felt no pain. Crucification was brutal and Christ really should have gone all Moses on the Romans and rained some frogs and hellfire down on them.

Let's face it, Moses was a bad ass. Once he got his powers via the magic staff, he went to town on the oppressors. Christ, the pacifist, was all about being martyred, and given all the super powers described in the gospels, I'm thinking Christ was feeling nothing and just putting on a show to gin up his followers.

If Christ was nailed to the cross laughing at the Romans and cracking jokes about how they can't hurt him, he would have come off as less sympathetic and kind of a dick.

Yabut, that would mean his daddy lied and then the whole infanticide thing falls apart, which would end the religion.

Actually, I believe that Jesus was probably a really cool hippie dude with a prostitute girlfriend, a teacher and a profit and that he was probably killed by the conservatives of the day. And, since crucifixion was relatively common, its possible, even likely that he was tortured to death in that manner.

Hardly enough to build a religion on though.

 

[Bumberclyde]

GOD HAS SOME WORDS FOR YOU MOCKERS AND SCOFFERS!!! The Coming Day of the Lord

3 Know this first of all, that in the last days mockers will come with their mocking, following after their own lusts, 4 and saying, “Where is the promise of His coming? For ever since the fathers fell asleep, all continues just as it was from the beginning of creation.” 5 For when they maintain this, it escapes their notice that by the word of God the heavens existed long ago and the earth was formed out of water and by water, 6 through which the world at that time was destroyed, being flooded with water. 7 But by His word the present heavens and earth are being reserved for fire, kept for the day of judgment and destruction of ungodly men.

8 But do not let this one fact escape your notice, beloved, that with the Lord one day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years like one day. 9 The Lord is not slow about His promise, as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing for any to perish but for all to come to repentance.

If god has something to say to me, he can say it to my face, he sure as hell wouldn't need some random doofus to read something from a book that he had nothing to do with.

 

[GISMYS]

The holy bible=god's inspired (god breathed) word to mankind ==you may try to ignore it but the price is your eternity!!!!! Think!

 

[Bumberclyde]

The holy bible=god's inspired (god breathed) word to mankind ==you may try to ignore it but the price is your eternity!!!!! Think!

If god is so powerful, why can't he tell me himself? Why has no one heard from him, or have been inspired by him in 2000 years? He have better things to do?

 

[GISMYS]

ALMIGHTY GOD MAKES THE RULES!!! BEST YOU little man LEARN YOUR PKLACE IN CREATION. little man COMPARED TO ALMIGHTY GOD IS LESS THAN A GERM ON A WORM ON A GERM!!! THINK!

 

[Bumberclyde]

ALMIGHTY GOD MAKES THE RULES!!! BEST YOU little man LEARN YOUR PKLACE IN CREATION. little man COMPARED TO ALMIGHTY GOD IS LESS THAN A GERM ON A WORM ON A GERM!!! THINK!

His rule book is made up with fairy tales.

 

[Uncensored2008]

First off, let me say that I believe the story of Christ is meant to inspire us to be better people.

DailyKOS is mobilizing the drones to press the attack in Obama's war on Christians, I see...

 

[Glensather]

If he wasn't in physical pain, he was definitely in emotional turmoil. "Father, why have you forsaken me?"

 

[Politico]

I dunno nut. I have some nails and a big piece of wood here. Come on over and we'll experiment a little.

 

[GISMYS]

almighty god makes the rules!!! Best you little man learn your pklace in creation. Little man compared to almighty god is less than a germ on a worm on a germ!!! Think!

his rule book is made up with fairy tales.

yes!!! The fool says in his heart,"there is no god"!!! And you???

 

[Wildman]

If you know a way to fake being crucified, let me know. Till then im willing to assume it hurt like hell. Literally.

They hammered nails through his hands and feet, put a crown of thorns on him, he just didn't feel anything. He was just acting for the crowd, pretending to be mortal, to be human.

If you saw the movie Prometheus, they hinted that ETs had planned to come back to earth 2000 years ago to destroy us because we did something to piss them off. We crucified to one they sent to earth to show us how to live. Jesus' super powers could be explained by excepting that ETs visited us, didn't like what they saw, the anger, wrath, and brutality of the OT, and hedonistic Roman society, and thus created a new mythology for, giving stories that would push us in a moral and right direction and become a better society.

History is reported to us by people who believe their personal account to be the one future generation need to hear -- thus unreliable as far as fact or accuracy. Four Gospels, only one mentions a virgin mother?

What's interesting is how much God himself shows up in the Old Testament and the New Testament is about someone who is the Son of God. And God himself only communicated via proxy, angles and Jesus.

WRONG ! it has been proven (The History Ch.) that Jesus was nailed between the Ulna and Radial bones near the wrists, they said that after 3 days hanging on the cross if nailed thru the hands his weight woud have torn thru the hands and Jesus would have fallen hanging from his feet.

 

[Bumberclyde]

almighty god makes the rules!!! Best you little man learn your pklace in creation. Little man compared to almighty god is less than a germ on a worm on a germ!!! Think!

his rule book is made up with fairy tales.

yes!!! The fool says in his heart,"there is no god"!!! And you???

I never said god doesn't exist, there's just no proof for one yet.

 

[Uncensored2008]

WRONG ! it has been proven (The History Ch.) that Jesus was nailed between the Ulna and Radial bones near the wrists, they said that after 3 days hanging on the cross if nailed thru the hands his weight woud have torn thru the hands and Jesus would have fallen hanging from his feet.

Probably not.

It appears that the Romans rarely nailed the hands at all, generally tying at the wrist and shoulder. They commonly nailed the feet to create agony as the victim would attempt to push up to gain breath. Crucifixion is a form of suffocation, very slow. In the cases where they nailed the hands, it was in addition to the ropes, which actually supported the weight of the body.

Crucifixion - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

 

[Avatar4321]

his rule book is made up with fairy tales.

yes!!! The fool says in his heart,"there is no god"!!! And you???

I never said god doesn't exist, there's just no proof for one yet.

Then ask Him. Follow the instructions He gives and you can know He is real.

 

[Bumberclyde]

yes!!! The fool says in his heart,"there is no god"!!! And you???

I never said god doesn't exist, there's just no proof for one yet.

Then ask Him. Follow the instructions He gives and you can know He is real.

How can I ask someone for which there is no proof?