Victim Mentality

[Gracie]

We all know someone(s) that is the perpetual victim and plays that card very well with passive aggressive actions, tries to show how "correct" they are and how "wrong" everyone else is, and never take responsibility for their own actions. It's annoying for those who have to deal with such a person(s) or if not deal with them, are stuck in their presence, like for example...at work.

Here is a list of different kinds of victim mentality. Interesting read, and a way to try to "get" where they are and how to deal with them...or not. But at least if one is aware of the problem of the "victim", one can handle it in the correct manner or better yet, know they are being scammed by a professional "victim" who gets off on the role they chose to play for whatever reason is in their victomy heads.

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Here is a sample from the link:

The Bully

Bullies are self-righteous victims who lash out and steam-roll over anyone or anything that frustrates their needs. Profoundly insecure and emotionally immature, bullies take little responsibility for their emotionally abusive behavior. In fact, they maintain that if everyone would just do things the right way (meaning "their way"), they would never have to get angry. Bullies are so caught up trying to defend themselves against what they see as a cold, hostile world that it never occurs to them that others have feelings, too.

 

[MisterBeale]

Hey, I just watched an interesting video on this the other night. . .

The video maker attributes this victim culture as a sign of societal decay. It's an interesting theory.

When progressives start eating themselves, you know things have gotten out of hand.

 

[Gracie]

VICTIMS' VICTIMS

Victims can be manipulative. Since they feel powerless, they assume that they can only get love and attention indirectly (i.e. through manipulation). Unable to say, "I really want you to like me," they'll selflessly cater to others' interests and desires hoping for love and friendship in return.

Instead of asking "Do you love me?" or "How much do you love me?" victims create crises and watch others' responses for evidence of care and concern. They confuse sympathy and pity with love, willingness to listen to their litany of complaints with intimacy.

Handling victims can be tricky. They don't respond well to direct confrontation, since that only reinforces their negativity and helplessness. But you can protect yourself from their manipulations:
· Don't get sucked in by victims' feelings. Victims use their suffering to keep others emotionally tied to them. Their feelings are real, but often subject to rapid change.
· Don't give advice. While victims may seem helpless to resolve their problems, the truth is, they don't want to. Giving advice and counsel may make you feel good, but don't expect the victim to act on it. When victims seek advice, they are looking fro evidence of your care and concern, not a plan of action. (If your suggestions are usually met with a "yes but..." response, you know you're dealing with a victim.)
· Go with the resistance and make it worse. Agree with victims: life truly is awful for them. Often, they'll change their tune, saying, "things aren't that bad…"
· Make it their problem. Express confidence in their ability to find a solution. By refusing to give advice, you reinforce the idea that victims have the power to solve their own problems.

 

[Gracie]

My own thoughts:

Perpetual Victims who try to "lead" or "help" others with words of wisdom or urgings to follow them in their own self entitlement of victimhood are not helping anyone at all. It comes down to Misery Loves Company syndrome. Their intentions are not to help someone else. Their intentions are to feel important and leach off someone else's needs. In short, an energy sucking vampire feeding off the insecurities of someone else. Jim Jones shit. Drink the koolaid and stfu. The only person being fed is the Leader Perpetual Victim, while the one(s) thinking they are being guided are slowly being sucked dry.