- Feb 12, 2007
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March 7th is National Cereal Day - and USMB is run by CEREAL Killer.
Hmmmmm....coinky dink? I think not.
And just to show how evul and creepy CEREAL can be, read:
No Matter How Hard We Run, We Can Never Escape Our Childhood Breakfast Cereals
I don't want to admit this, really, but -- and what you're about to read is pretty much actually true -- since I was a child, I've had a strong revulsion to Kaboom cereal, due to what may be called a early-childhood type of social dysmorphia.
And, ultimately, self-hatred.
You say you've never heard of Kaboom? You think I'm making Kaboom up?
Well let me explain this. You've heard of Apple Jacks, right? Sure you have. Everyone has.
I wanted to be an Apple Jacks kid.
Apple Jacks kids had so much fun in the commercials. Fresh-faced, healthy, and free, and hopeful for the future. Singing and dancing and just loving on their Apple Jacks.
And the cereal was awesome too. I had it once in a Snack-Pack that fell off a truck.
But there were no commercials for Kaboom.
It was just a dirty little secret, like massage parlors and the back room at a pawnbroker's.
That's why you never heard of it.
But Kaboom kids know. Kaboom kids understand.....
No Matter How Hard We Run, We Can Never Escape Our Childhood Breakfast Cereals
Hmmmmm....coinky dink? I think not.
And just to show how evul and creepy CEREAL can be, read:
No Matter How Hard We Run, We Can Never Escape Our Childhood Breakfast Cereals
I don't want to admit this, really, but -- and what you're about to read is pretty much actually true -- since I was a child, I've had a strong revulsion to Kaboom cereal, due to what may be called a early-childhood type of social dysmorphia.
And, ultimately, self-hatred.
You say you've never heard of Kaboom? You think I'm making Kaboom up?
Well let me explain this. You've heard of Apple Jacks, right? Sure you have. Everyone has.
I wanted to be an Apple Jacks kid.
Apple Jacks kids had so much fun in the commercials. Fresh-faced, healthy, and free, and hopeful for the future. Singing and dancing and just loving on their Apple Jacks.
And the cereal was awesome too. I had it once in a Snack-Pack that fell off a truck.
But there were no commercials for Kaboom.
It was just a dirty little secret, like massage parlors and the back room at a pawnbroker's.
That's why you never heard of it.
But Kaboom kids know. Kaboom kids understand.....
No Matter How Hard We Run, We Can Never Escape Our Childhood Breakfast Cereals
