hehehe. The looney left dictionary... This is what they think of Republicans.

[Stephanie]

Dictionary of Republicanisms
The Nation | Tue Nov 22, 4:12 PM ET | Katrina vanden Heuvel

I don't have an actual link to this, I saw it on another site and thought it was interesting, and funny...



Over the past few decades, the radical right has engaged in a well-funded, self-conscious program of Orwellian doublespeak, transforming the American political discourse to suit its ends. Think tanks like the Cato Institute routinely market phrases for their political resonance, like "personal" vs. "private" accounts. Frank Luntz, the Republican pollster, lexicographer and MSNBC pundit who combines Madison Avenue techniques with K Street connections, sends out regular missives informing Republican operatives and politicians on how to spin conservative policy proposals. (He was on The Daily Show demonstrating his talents, defining "manipulation" as "explanation and education.") Paul Wolfowitz admitted to Vanity Fair that "weapons of mass destruction" was agreed upon as the reason to go to war with Iraq because it was the most salable rationale. And we all know how that turned out.


Before we can win the great battle of ideas, we must debunk the right's political discourse, a veritable code of encrypted language that twists common usage to deceive the public for the Republicans' purposes. The key to their linguistic strategy is to use words that sound moderate to us but mean something completely different to them. Their tactics range from the childish use of antonyms ("clean" = "dirty") to the pseudo-academic use of prefixes ("neo" is a favorite) to the pernicious and very expensive rebranding of traditional labels ("liberal" as an insult).

We decided we needed to break the code by building a Republican dictionary. Skewer their deceptions with the fine-tipped sword of satire. Lies melt away in the face of mockery.

Unlike Republicans, who rely on rich old cranks and intellectuals-for-hire to do their dirty work, we opened up the process to the people. For six months, thenation.com accepted suggestions from everyone who wanted to participate. The result was an overwhelming grassroots groundswell of hilarious submissions from citizens who are mad as hell and aren't going to take it anymore. Thousands of definitions were entered from all over the country, forty-four states in all, along with Puerto Rico and Washington, DC. (We even received a few from outraged Canadians, Australians and Brits.)

As momentum for the project grew, friends and allies joined the effort. TomDispatch.com asked its readers and writers to submit their own definitions. Reviewing the submissions from our website, we found that certain trends became apparent. "Compassionate conservative" and "ownership society" were the most popular targets. "No Child Left Behind" was the most common riff. The disaster in Iraq was the subject of the most outrage. The results have been compiled in a new book, Dictionary of Republicanisms (Nation Books). Here are some of my favorites. I hope they inspire you to action, to take back this great nation from those who are doing it such harm.

abstinence-only sex education n. Ignorance-only sex education [Wayne Martorelli, Lawrenceville, NJ].

alternative energy sources n. New locations to drill for gas and oil [Peter Scholz, Fort Collins, Colo.].

bankruptcy n. A punishable crime when committed by poor people but not corporations [Beth Thielen, Studio City, Calif.].

"burning bush" n. A biblical allusion to the response of the President of the United States when asked a question by a journalist who has not been paid to inquire [Bill Moyers, New York, NY].

Cheney, Dick n. The greater of two evils [Jacob McCullar, Austin, Tex.].

China n. See Wal-Mart [Rebecca Solnit, San Francisco, Calif.].

class warfare n. Any attempt to raise the minimum wage [Don Zweir, Grayslake, Ill.].

climate change n. The blessed day when the blue states are swallowed by the oceans [Ann Klopp, Princeton, NJ]

compassionate conservatism n. Poignant concern for the very wealthy [Lawrence Sandek, Twin Peaks, Calif.].

creationism n. Pseudoscience that claims George W. Bush's resemblance to a chimpanzee is totally coincidental [Brian Sweeney, Providence, RI].

DeLay, Tom n. 1. Past tense of De Lie [Rick Rodstrom, Los Angeles, Calif.]. 2. Patronage saint [Andrew Magni, Nonatum, Mass.].

democracy n. A product so extensively exported that the domestic supply is depleted [Michael Schwartz, unknown].

dittohead n. An Oxy(contin)moron [Zydeco Boudreaux, Gretna, La.].

energy independence n. The caribou witness relocation program [Justin Rezzonico, Keene, Ohio].

extraordinary rendition n. Outsourcing torture [Milton Feldon, Laguna Woods, Calif.].

faith n. The stubborn belief that God approves of Republican moral values despite the preponderance of textual evidence to the contrary [Matthew Polly, Topeka, Kans.].

Fox News fict. Faux news [Justin Rezzonico, Keene, Ohio].

free markets n. Halliburton no-bid contracts at taxpayer expense [Sean O'Brian, Chicago, Ill.].

girly men n. Males who do not grope women inappropriately [Nick Gill, Newton, Mass.].

God n. Senior presidential adviser [Martin Richard, Belgrade, Mont.].

growth n. 1. The justification for tax cuts for the rich. 2. What happens to the national debt when Republicans cut taxes on the rich [Matthew Polly, Topeka, Kans.].

habeas corpus n. Archaic. (Lat.) Legal term no longer in use (See Patriot Act) [Josh Wanstreet, Nutter Fort, WV].

healthy forest n. No tree left behind [Dan McWilliams, Santa Barbara, Calif.].

homelandism n. A neologism for love of the Homeland Security State, as in "My Homeland, 'tis of thee, sweet security state of liberty..." [Tom Engelhardt, New York, NY].

honesty n. Lies told in simple declarative sentences--e.g., "Freedom is on the march" [Katrina vanden Heuvel, New York, NY].

House of Representatives n. Exclusive club; entry fee $1 million to $5 million (See Senate) [Adam Hochschild, San Francisco, Calif.].

laziness n. When the poor are not working [Justin Rezzonico, Keene, Ohio].

leisure time n. When the wealthy are not working [Justin Rezzonico, Keene, Ohio].

liberal(s) n. Followers of the Antichrist [Ann Wegher, Montello, Wisc.].

Miller, Zell n. The man who shot and killed Alexander Hamilton after a particularly tough interview on Hardball [Drew Dillion, Arlington, Va.

neoconservatives n. Nerds with Napoleonic complexes [Matthew Polly, Topeka, Kans.].

9/11 n. Tragedy used to justify any administrative policy, especially if unrelated (See Deficit, Iraq War) [Dan Mason, Durham, NH].

No Child Left Behind riff. 1. v. There are always jobs in the military [Ann Klopp, Princeton, NJ]. 2. n. The rapture [Samantha Hess, Cottonwood, Ariz.].

ownership society n. A civilization where 1 percent of the population controls 90 percent of the wealth [Michael Albert, Piscataway, NJ].

Patriot Act n. 1. The pre-emptive strike on American freedoms to prevent the terrorists from destroying them first. 2. The elimination of one of the reasons why they hate us [Michael Thomas, Socorro, NM].

pro-life adj. Valuing human life up until birth [Kevin Weaver, San Francisco, Calif.].

Senate n. Exclusive club; entry fee $10 million to $30 million [Adam Hochschild, San Francisco, Calif.].

simplify v. To cut the taxes of Republican donors [Katrina vanden Heuvel, New York, NY].

staying the course interj. Slang. Saying and doing the same stupid thing over and over, regardless of the result [Suzanne Smith, Ann Arbor, Mich.].

stuff happens interj. Slang. Donald Rumsfeld as master historian [Sheila and Chalmers Johnson, San Diego, Calif.].

voter fraud n. A significant minority turnout [Sue Bazy, Philadelphia, Pa.].

Wal-Mart n. The nation-state, future tense [Rebecca Solnit, San Francisco, Calif.].

water n. Arsenic storage device [Joy Losee, Gainesville, Ga.].

woman n. 1. Person who can be trusted to bear a child but can't be trusted to decide whether or not she wishes to have thechild. 2. Person who must have all decisions regarding her reproductive functions made by men with whom she wouldn't want to have sex in the first place [Denise Clay, Philadelphia, Pa.].

There all pretty weird. but the last one is pretty telling!!!!

 

[Annie]

Here's the link

http://www.thenation.com/blogs/edcut?bid=7

 

[KarlMarx]

Hope I don't steal your thunder, but National Review had one a few years ago that I thought I'd keep for posterity

activist, n. Leftist troublemaker.

affirmative action, n. Quotas by race, sex, and often sexual orientation (though never by religion or political inclination).

Arab street, the, n. The cab driver who took your correspondent from Amman airport to the Hilton Hotel.

bash, v.t. To make uncomplimentary remarks about a DVG. To suggest that some particular member of a DVG has moral failings. E.g., “immigrant-bashing” — opposing illegal immigration.

bigotry, n. The open expression of conservative opinions.

celebrate, v.t. (In such bound forms as “celebrate diversity.”) To feign wholehearted enthusiasm for some theory, doctrine, law, ruling, or administrative fait accompli that strips you of some of your rights or property.

censorship, n. A refusal, on the part of the public authorities, to disburse public monies to performance artists (q.v.), transgressive artists (q.v.), and so on.

centrist, adj. Liberal. See also mainstream, moderate.

children, for the sake of our (slogan). Teachers unions, for the sake of the.

choice, n. The killing of human fetuses in utero, or the removal by suction of the brain of a newborn baby.

civil rights, n. The privileges to which DVGs are entitled.

Communist, n. A person who adheres to the economic and political theories of Karl Marx and V. I. Lenin. No member of the U.S. media knows any such person, nor ever has. Probably no such person ever existed. If such a person did exist, he or she was undoubtedly full of good intentions, though perhaps mistaken as to methods.

controversial, adj. (Applied to a nominee for any cabinet or judicial position requiring congressional approval.) Conservative.

deficit, n. An imbalance in state or national finances brought about by the willful refusal of the executive branch to support the ever-increasing levels of taxation required to fund the disbursements required by the legislature (q.v.).

discrimination, n. Formerly known as “freedom of association.”

diverse, adj. (Applied to a collectivity of persons.) Containing persons of all possible skin colors, sexes, sexual preferences, and immigration statuses, but preferably of identically mainstream (q.v.) opinions.

drastic cuts in government services, n. Reductions in the rate of growth of the rate of growth of the public sector’s rate of growth.

education, n. The activity engaged in by members of teachers unions, in the brief intervals between political lobbying, skills-enhancement sabbaticals, etc.

Episcopal Church of the U.S.A., n. A dating service for homosexuals, funded mainly by revenues from ownership of real estate in New York City.

gun lobbies, n. People opposed to the idea that the only armed civilians should be bank robbers.

hate speech, n. Words that are offensive to some powerful interest group.

inappropriate, adj. True, but unmentionable for political reasons.

inclusive, adj. Firm in the belief that no two people ought ever be treated differently by anyone at all in any context at all. Opposite of divisive.

International Criminal Court, n. A gathering of European and Third World left-wing jurists, committed to bringing to trial and punishing Henry Kissinger for the crime of having helped thwart a Communist coup in Chile, thereby depriving the Chilean people of universal free health care and 100 percent literacy (q.v.).

judiciary, n. A body of citizens charged with making those laws that Congress has omitted to make.

law school, n. An institution for the inculcation of politically correct ideas in young adults; a place where the process of extracting new rights and benefits from the Constitution is taught; the natural and proper aspiration for all young persons.

legislature, n. An institution whose purpose is to identify the few dozen noisiest, wealthiest, or most troublesome of many thousands of factions in a state, or in the nation, and to disburse public monies to them. In the event that a faction so identified is already a recipient of public monies, the legislature must ensure that the amount disbursed increases each year.

living wage, n. The latest wage demand by some public-sector labor union.
mainstream, adj. (Applied to a person’s opinions.) Liberal. See also centrist, moderate.

marriage, n. An archaic institution for the oppression of women and the abuse of children, from participation in which homosexual couples are cruelly and unjustly barred.

mean-spirited, adj. Insufficiently deferential to, or failing to acknowledge the inherent moral superiority of, some DVG.

media, n. A program of indoor relief for unemployable intellectuals.

military, n. A branch of the social-welfare services designated to work overseas at improving the lives of foreigners.

moderate, adj. Liberal. See also centrist, mainstream.

multiculturalism, n. The doctrine that persons of European ancestry are morally inferior to all other human beings.

nativist, n. A person who believes that citizens should have rights in law that are not available to foreigners, or that illegal immigration is illegal.

no child left behind (slogan). No U.S. citizen should do manual work. Everyone should go to law school.

no justice, no peace! (slogan). Give us money or we’ll riot!

non-violent offenders, n. Thieves, burglars, and junkies.

Ozzie and Harriet, n. Representatives of the false consciousness prevalent in the United States prior to the liberating movements of the 1960s. A married couple with no powers of imagination or self-awareness, trapped in such delusions as that unblemished domesticity is a satisfactory lifestyle, or that child-raising is best conducted with minimal state interference.

partner, n. Husband, wife, lover, mistress, catamite, or “participating” pet.

peace, n. Appeasement of dictators or terrorists.

peace process, n. The handing over of a liberal, constitutional order to terrorists and gangsters, conducted so slowly that outsiders lose all interest.

performance art, n. Gross exhibitionism, usually of an obscene nature.

poetry, n. A form of writing, in which the random thoughts of a self-obsessed person are arranged on a page in such a way that they cannot be mistaken for prose.

poverty, n. The condition of being neither middle-class nor rich. Thirty million Americans are always “living in poverty,” regardless of the state of the national economy, improvements in the provision of public services, or any other changes in the life of the nation. This 30 million is a physical constant, like the speed of light.

public investment, n. Kiss your tax dollars goodbye.

questioning, adj. (As in “gay, lesbian, transgendered, and questioning youth.”) Thought to be a good prospect for seduction by adult homosexuals.

Religious Right, n. Persons who believe that the Bible is divinely inspired.

renewable energy sources, n. 300-ft.-high windmills costing $12 million apiece, each generating sufficient power to operate a small domestic refrigerator.

reparations, n. Monies proposed to be paid to the descendants of black slaves by the descendants of white serfs and yellow coolies.

road map to peace, n. See peace process.

simplistic, adj. Predicated on the belief, or apparent belief, that good and evil differ from each other in some fashion.

self-esteem, n. The mental state formerly known as “the sin of pride.”

social change, n. Higher taxes to sustain more government employees.

social justice, n. See social change.

socially aware, adj. Cringing before the overwhelming moral superiority of DVGs.

spew, spout, v.t. To speak in a way that is inappropriate (q.v.). A style of speech favored by bigots.

sustainable development, n. A style of national economic management favored by persons who wear sandals over socks.

tax cut for the rich, n. Tax cut.

transgressive, adj. Obscene, usually with homosexual content.

troubled, adj. Pretending, for political purposes, to be in a state of high-minded indignation. E.g., “Opponents of Justice [Priscilla] Owen are rightly troubled by her extremely conservative record as a Texas state court judge” (New York Times).

undocumented immigrant, n. A person whose first act on entering the United States is to violate our laws. Mildly offensive. Preferred terms: “day laborer,” “immigrant.” universal free health care and 100 percent literacy, n. The principal features of life in Cuba, but nowhere else.

urban youth, n. Street punks.

warmonger, n. A person who wishes ill to his country’s enemies.

 

[William Joyce]

They're both funny but I like NR's a wee bit better!