Anything Goes Humor

[Auld Phart]

 

[Auld Phart]

 

[Wyld Kard]

 

[Auld Phart]

 

[Truth2Know]

COSTELLO: I want to talk about the unemployment rate in America.

ABBOTT: Good Subject. Terrible Times. It's 5.6%.

COSTELLO: That many people are out of work?

ABBOTT: No, that's 23%.

COSTELLO: You just said 5.6%.

ABBOTT: 5.6% Unemployed.

COSTELLO: Right 5.6% out of work.

ABBOTT: No, that's 23%.

COSTELLO: Okay, so it's 23% unemployed.

ABBOTT: No, that's 5.6%.

COSTELLO: WAIT A MINUTE......Is it 5.6% or 23%?

ABBOTT: 5.6% are unemployed. 23% are out of work.

COSTELLO: If you are out of work, you are unemployed.

ABBOTT: No, Obama said you can't count the "Out of Work" as the unemployed. You have to look for work to be unemployed.

COSTELLO: BUT THEY ARE OUT OF WORK!!!

ABBOTT: No, you miss his point.

COSTELLO: What point?

ABBOTT: Someone who doesn't look for work can't be counted with those who look for work. It wouldn't be fair.

COSTELLO: To whom?

ABBOTT: The unemployed.

COSTELLO: But ALL of them are out of work.

ABBOTT: No, the unemployed are actively looking for work. Those who are out of work gave up looking and if you give up, you are no longer in the ranks of the unemployed.

COSTELLO: So if you're off the unemployment roles that would count as less unemployment?

ABBOTT: Unemployment would go down. Absolutely!

COSTELLO: The unemployment just goes down because you don't look for work?

ABBOTT: Absolutely it goes down. That's how it gets to 5.6%. Otherwise it would be 23%.

COSTELLO: Wait, I got a question for you. That means there are two ways to bring down the unemployment number?

ABBOTT: Two ways is correct.

COSTELLO: Unemployment can go down if someone gets a job?

ABBOTT: Correct.

COSTELLO: And unemployment can also go down if you stop looking for a job?

ABBOTT: Bingo.

COSTELLO: So there are two ways to bring unemployment down, and the easier of the two is to have people stop looking for work.

ABBOTT: Now you're thinking like a Democrat.

COSTELLO: I don't even know what I just said!

ABBOTT: Now you're thinking like Hillary.

 

[Auld Phart]

 

[Auld Phart]

 

[Truth2Know]

Globalization Explained

Question: What is the truest example of Globalization?

Answer : Princess Diana's death. An English Princess with an Egyptian boyfriend crashes in a French tunnel,
riding in a German car with a Dutch engine, driven by a Belgian who was drunk on Scottish whisky, (check the bottle before you change the spelling), followed closely by Italian Paparazzi, on Japanese motorcycles, treated
by an American doctor, using Brazilian medicines.

This is sent to you by a Canadian, using American Bill Gates' technology, and you're probably reading this on your computer, that uses Taiwanese chips, and a Chinese monitor, assembled by Bangladeshi workers in a Singapore plant, transported by Indian truck drivers, hijacked by Indonesians, unloaded by Sicilian longshoremen, and
trucked to you by Mexicans who are in the US illegally because the current president, Educated as a Muslim in Indonesia, refuses to enforce US law.

That, my friends,is Globalization.

 

[Wyld Kard]

 

[Bonzi]

 

[Wyld Kard]

 

[LadyGunSlinger]

LMFAO!! I love it.. I'm sharing this one! ;-)

 

[LadyGunSlinger]

Hahahaha Made me laugh! LOL

 

[Auld Phart]

 

[TheGreatGatsby]

 

[Toro]

gasbag is to humor as a nun is to sex.

 

[MaryL]

All these great post, and all have is: What is brown and sounds like a bell?DUNG.

 

[ABikerSailor]

Q: What is the difference between a women's track team, and a tribe of smart Pygmies?

A: One is a bunch of cunning runts.

 

[Wyld Kard]

 

[theliq]

I WAS Explaining to my Good Friend Hoss about the New,Male Contraceptive Pill.........Unfortunately Hoss put it in the heel of his Shoe and it's made him LIMP.