People marrying animals

[emilynghiem]

I have thought about marrying my dog, a Golden Retriever. It is nothing sexual, of course; no jar of peanut butter in my future - Delta, you know what I am talking about.

I have been married to a human woman. My dog is more loyal, she is always looking at me lovingly, she sleeps with me every night (quit touching yourself, Delta. She sleeps at my feet), she does not PMS, she is always happy to see me, she does not bitch about how I spend my money or where I have been. Obviously, there are some short falls: no sex, and she cannot take care of me if I am sick.

I think we will just continue to live together, though. Marriage really is only good for the legitimation of children.

You are already free to exercise your religion as you see fit.
If you want to write a contract concerning your dog, the most I have seen
is people leaving their estates to their pets as fully legal.

However, a dog cannot be held legally liable as a partner in a contract.
You might want to consult with dog whisperers or pet psychologists on how to communicate
to establish a mutual contract with your dog. Otherwise you are seen as the legally responsible
party in any arrangement while the dog is protected under laws against abuse or cruelty/negligence
but not a legal person for signing a contract.