was waitress racist?

[rightwinger]

I have been having a difficult time with this one:

My gf is brown, and I am a white man. We were at a restaurant paying our bill. We split the cost of the meal but had different drinks. My drink was $2 more than hers. After giving our credits cards, we received our respective receipts, but we noticed that a mistake was made: my gf was charged with my more expensive drink, while I had her cheaper one on my bill.

After, my gf claimed that no one could mess such a simple thing up and that this was an act of racism, which she also described as a feeling she had about the white waitress and her tone. I didn't recognize this tone, but I can be aloof.

I said to my gf that it could also just have been an honest mistake, or perhaps there could be another reason for the mistake that is uncertain to us.

She became extremely upset by my insensitivity and yelled at me for two days. I am being as honest as I can with her; I didn't know if we could know that it was racism, but I now have accepted her feelings and instinct as the closest thing I have to the truth because she has felt subtle forms of racism like this in the past.

She ridiculed me for not immediately accepting her intuition as truth.

Any thoughts on this situation?

Thank you,
John

None of this would have happened if you had picked up the tab

 

[Asclepias]

I have been having a difficult time with this one:

My gf is brown, and I am a white man. We were at a restaurant paying our bill. We split the cost of the meal but had different drinks. My drink was $2 more than hers. After giving our credits cards, we received our respective receipts, but we noticed that a mistake was made: my gf was charged with my more expensive drink, while I had her cheaper one on my bill.

After, my gf claimed that no one could mess such a simple thing up and that this was an act of racism, which she also described as a feeling she had about the white waitress and her tone. I didn't recognize this tone, but I can be aloof.

I said to my gf that it could also just have been an honest mistake, or perhaps there could be another reason for the mistake that is uncertain to us.

She became extremely upset by my insensitivity and yelled at me for two days. I am being as honest as I can with her; I didn't know if we could know that it was racism, but I now have accepted her feelings and instinct as the closest thing I have to the truth because she has felt subtle forms of racism like this in the past.

She ridiculed me for not immediately accepting her intuition as truth.

Any thoughts on this situation?

Thank you,
John

Never doubt your womans intuition. They pick up stuff men dont see. Regardless of if it was racist or not she just needed you to show support. Ask yourself is your opinion more important than simply agreeing with her? If it is ditch your girl because it will end if not over this then something else. If its not apologize and say you thought about it and she was probably right. Make sure you never make a small insignificant issue a major sticking point. Pick your battles.

If she had been discriminated against by all means he should have been most attentive to her and let her know that he would always take seriously anything that harmed her (in any way!) But from this story it is quite clear that the woman has issues and if he does not wish to be miserable for the rest of his life (should he have the misfortune of marrying her) he should say good bye now - and by all means - give her back the 2 dollars.

When a person is a racist (and she is the racist in this story) dating a person of the opposite race - the battering ram is going to become the boyfriend. He doesn't need this. She is trying to control him by her emotions. It's a very, very bad sign.

The point is that she felt as if she was discriminated against which could have been the case. No one knows for sure. I've had the opposite occur under similar conditions and I thought the woman I was dating was over reacting but later went back into the same establishment and had the waitress ask me where my "white" girlfriend was. Women are pretty good at picking up things.

 

[Asclepias]

I have been having a difficult time with this one:

My gf is brown, and I am a white man. We were at a restaurant paying our bill. We split the cost of the meal but had different drinks. My drink was $2 more than hers. After giving our credits cards, we received our respective receipts, but we noticed that a mistake was made: my gf was charged with my more expensive drink, while I had her cheaper one on my bill.

After, my gf claimed that no one could mess such a simple thing up and that this was an act of racism, which she also described as a feeling she had about the white waitress and her tone. I didn't recognize this tone, but I can be aloof.

I said to my gf that it could also just have been an honest mistake, or perhaps there could be another reason for the mistake that is uncertain to us.

She became extremely upset by my insensitivity and yelled at me for two days. I am being as honest as I can with her; I didn't know if we could know that it was racism, but I now have accepted her feelings and instinct as the closest thing I have to the truth because she has felt subtle forms of racism like this in the past.

She ridiculed me for not immediately accepting her intuition as truth.

Any thoughts on this situation?

Thank you,
John

None of this would have happened if you had picked up the tab

I was going ask why he simply didnt pay for it.

 

[Book of Jeremiah]

Asceplias, what this young lady has is a root of bitterness. A root of bitterness comes from being with others who have it, listening to their bitterness and permitting it to come into your own heart and take up residence. Racism is the fruit of a root of bitterness.

When you note someone with a root of bitterness? You need to separate company from them and have nothing to do with them. It does not matter who they are. You have to walk away. If they have a teachable spirit you could tell them what you see and admonish them to repent but if not I would just walk away. Continue to pray for them but don't have anything to do with them. Here is the scripture about it.

It is written:


Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled.
___________
As you can see a root of bitterness defiles others. How? By listening to their bitterness and making it your own. It will defile you and eventually you'll be walking in unbelief. Which will rob you of eternal life. Is it worth it? No.

 

[Asclepias]

Asceplias, what this young lady has is a root of bitterness. A root of bitterness comes from being with others who have it, listening to their bitterness and permitting it to come into your own heart and take up residence. Racism is the fruit of a root of bitterness.

When you note someone with a root of bitterness? You need to separate company from them and have nothing to do with them. It does not matter who they are. You have to walk away. If they have a teachable spirit you could tell them what you see and admonish them to repent but if not I would just walk away. Continue to pray for them but don't have anything to do with them. Here is the scripture about it.

It is written:


Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled.
___________
As you can see a root of bitterness defiles others. How? By listening to their bitterness and making it your own. It will defile you and eventually you'll be walking in unbelief. Which will rob you of eternal life. Is it worth it? No.

I disagree on 2 of your points. Bitterness is a product of racism not the other way around. Some bitter people are worth helping.

 

[Book of Jeremiah]

I have been having a difficult time with this one:

My gf is brown, and I am a white man. We were at a restaurant paying our bill. We split the cost of the meal but had different drinks. My drink was $2 more than hers. After giving our credits cards, we received our respective receipts, but we noticed that a mistake was made: my gf was charged with my more expensive drink, while I had her cheaper one on my bill.

After, my gf claimed that no one could mess such a simple thing up and that this was an act of racism, which she also described as a feeling she had about the white waitress and her tone. I didn't recognize this tone, but I can be aloof.

I said to my gf that it could also just have been an honest mistake, or perhaps there could be another reason for the mistake that is uncertain to us.

She became extremely upset by my insensitivity and yelled at me for two days. I am being as honest as I can with her; I didn't know if we could know that it was racism, but I now have accepted her feelings and instinct as the closest thing I have to the truth because she has felt subtle forms of racism like this in the past.

She ridiculed me for not immediately accepting her intuition as truth.

Any thoughts on this situation?

Thank you,
John

None of this would have happened if you had picked up the tab

Which is why it is a blessing that he didn't. Now he knows what is in her and he can walk away a free man.

 

[Apple]

I have been having a difficult time with this one:

My gf is brown, and I am a white man. We were at a restaurant paying our bill. We split the cost of the meal but had different drinks. My drink was $2 more than hers. After giving our credits cards, we received our respective receipts, but we noticed that a mistake was made: my gf was charged with my more expensive drink, while I had her cheaper one on my bill.

After, my gf claimed that no one could mess such a simple thing up and that this was an act of racism, which she also described as a feeling she had about the white waitress and her tone. I didn't recognize this tone, but I can be aloof.

I said to my gf that it could also just have been an honest mistake, or perhaps there could be another reason for the mistake that is uncertain to us.

She became extremely upset by my insensitivity and yelled at me for two days. I am being as honest as I can with her; I didn't know if we could know that it was racism, but I now have accepted her feelings and instinct as the closest thing I have to the truth because she has felt subtle forms of racism like this in the past.

She ridiculed me for not immediately accepting her intuition as truth.

Any thoughts on this situation?

Thank you,
John

You might want to Tweet Eric Holder for his opinion. He's been looking for racists to crucify.

ha!

 

[rightwinger]

I have been having a difficult time with this one:

My gf is brown, and I am a white man. We were at a restaurant paying our bill. We split the cost of the meal but had different drinks. My drink was $2 more than hers. After giving our credits cards, we received our respective receipts, but we noticed that a mistake was made: my gf was charged with my more expensive drink, while I had her cheaper one on my bill.

After, my gf claimed that no one could mess such a simple thing up and that this was an act of racism, which she also described as a feeling she had about the white waitress and her tone. I didn't recognize this tone, but I can be aloof.

I said to my gf that it could also just have been an honest mistake, or perhaps there could be another reason for the mistake that is uncertain to us.

She became extremely upset by my insensitivity and yelled at me for two days. I am being as honest as I can with her; I didn't know if we could know that it was racism, but I now have accepted her feelings and instinct as the closest thing I have to the truth because she has felt subtle forms of racism like this in the past.

She ridiculed me for not immediately accepting her intuition as truth.

Any thoughts on this situation?

Thank you,
John

None of this would have happened if you had picked up the tab

Which is why it is a blessing that he didn't. Now he knows what is in her and he can walk away a free man.

My biggest problem is she is ******* cheap

Who cares if you pick up your boyfriends $2 drink?

 

[Iceweasel]

I have been having a difficult time with this one:

My gf is brown, and I am a white man. We were at a restaurant paying our bill. We split the cost of the meal but had different drinks. My drink was $2 more than hers. After giving our credits cards, we received our respective receipts, but we noticed that a mistake was made: my gf was charged with my more expensive drink, while I had her cheaper one on my bill.

After, my gf claimed that no one could mess such a simple thing up and that this was an act of racism, which she also described as a feeling she had about the white waitress and her tone. I didn't recognize this tone, but I can be aloof.

I said to my gf that it could also just have been an honest mistake, or perhaps there could be another reason for the mistake that is uncertain to us.

She became extremely upset by my insensitivity and yelled at me for two days. I am being as honest as I can with her; I didn't know if we could know that it was racism, but I now have accepted her feelings and instinct as the closest thing I have to the truth because she has felt subtle forms of racism like this in the past.

She ridiculed me for not immediately accepting her intuition as truth.

Any thoughts on this situation?

Thank you,
John

Run, don't walk, and find a different girlfriend. Do you think she's going to get better?

 

[Asclepias]

I have been having a difficult time with this one:

My gf is brown, and I am a white man. We were at a restaurant paying our bill. We split the cost of the meal but had different drinks. My drink was $2 more than hers. After giving our credits cards, we received our respective receipts, but we noticed that a mistake was made: my gf was charged with my more expensive drink, while I had her cheaper one on my bill.

After, my gf claimed that no one could mess such a simple thing up and that this was an act of racism, which she also described as a feeling she had about the white waitress and her tone. I didn't recognize this tone, but I can be aloof.

I said to my gf that it could also just have been an honest mistake, or perhaps there could be another reason for the mistake that is uncertain to us.

She became extremely upset by my insensitivity and yelled at me for two days. I am being as honest as I can with her; I didn't know if we could know that it was racism, but I now have accepted her feelings and instinct as the closest thing I have to the truth because she has felt subtle forms of racism like this in the past.

She ridiculed me for not immediately accepting her intuition as truth.

Any thoughts on this situation?

Thank you,
John

Run, don't walk, and find a different girlfriend. Do you think she's going to get better?

I agree. If you cant understand she would be a lot better at detecting racism it will only end in failure.

 

[Book of Jeremiah]

Asceplias, what this young lady has is a root of bitterness. A root of bitterness comes from being with others who have it, listening to their bitterness and permitting it to come into your own heart and take up residence. Racism is the fruit of a root of bitterness.

When you note someone with a root of bitterness? You need to separate company from them and have nothing to do with them. It does not matter who they are. You have to walk away. If they have a teachable spirit you could tell them what you see and admonish them to repent but if not I would just walk away. Continue to pray for them but don't have anything to do with them. Here is the scripture about it.

It is written:


Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled.
___________
As you can see a root of bitterness defiles others. How? By listening to their bitterness and making it your own. It will defile you and eventually you'll be walking in unbelief. Which will rob you of eternal life. Is it worth it? No.

I disagree on 2 of your points. Bitterness is a product of racism not the other way around. Some bitter people are worth helping.

Yes, by prayer and giving them the Word of God. You cannot talk a person out of bitterness. It is a spiritual condition. You are stating that Bitterness is a product of racism. You may as well say Fruit. There are many fruits of racism - envy, murder, strife, hatred, jealousy, wrath,bitterness....and as you see - none of it is good.

Today in America there is racism found in all races of people. There are Chinese people who are racists, Russians who are racists, their mindset is one of superiority - that they are the super race - it is no different from the white man who thought he was superior to the black man because of his skin color.

Do you know that if a Christian judges another person by their skin color - and is a racist against African American people - that they will go to hell? It's true. You cannot hate a black person because they are black and go to heaven. It's not happening. Did you know that there is no such thing as a black person who is a Christian - going to heaven with hatred in their hearts for white people? They cannot go to heaven either. So racism is caused by a Root of Bitterness that will literally bring you into a state of unbelief ( even unbelief that you could lose your salvation over it!) and cause you to lose your eternal life - in heaven- leaving only one place to go. Hell.

How terrible is that? That is why I would advise this young man to RUN not walk away from this relationship. She has a root of bitterness in her.

As Christians we need to walk in forgiveness. If the waitress was in any way a racist? It's her problem (the waitress') and the right answer is to pray for her and ask the LORD to deliver her of it. Are there white waitresses that are racists? Absolutely. Are their black waitresses that are racists? Absolutely. God isn't looking at the color of one's skin. He is looking at the what is inside the heart. That is where we will be judged.

You should guard your heart with all diligence because out of it flow the issues of life. I have to guard my own heart. You'd be surprised how easily the enemy can try to come in with some small suggestion. It is the little foxes that destroy the vine. You have to be vigilant. Cutting off the relationship is being vigilant.

 

[Asclepias]

Asceplias, what this young lady has is a root of bitterness. A root of bitterness comes from being with others who have it, listening to their bitterness and permitting it to come into your own heart and take up residence. Racism is the fruit of a root of bitterness.

When you note someone with a root of bitterness? You need to separate company from them and have nothing to do with them. It does not matter who they are. You have to walk away. If they have a teachable spirit you could tell them what you see and admonish them to repent but if not I would just walk away. Continue to pray for them but don't have anything to do with them. Here is the scripture about it.

It is written:


Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled.
___________
As you can see a root of bitterness defiles others. How? By listening to their bitterness and making it your own. It will defile you and eventually you'll be walking in unbelief. Which will rob you of eternal life. Is it worth it? No.

I disagree on 2 of your points. Bitterness is a product of racism not the other way around. Some bitter people are worth helping.

Yes, by prayer and giving them the Word of God. You cannot talk a person out of bitterness. It is a spiritual condition. You are stating that Bitterness is a product of racism. You may as well say Fruit. There are many fruits of racism - envy, murder, strife, hatred, jealousy, wrath....and as you see - none of it is good. Today in America there is racism found in all races of people. There are Chinese people who are racists, Russians who are racists, their mindset is one of superiority - that they are the super race - it is no different from the white man who thought he was superior to the black man because of his skin color.

Do you know that if a Christian judges another person by their skin color - is a racist against African American people - that they will go to hell? It's true. You cannot hate a black person because they are black and go to heaven. It's not happening. Did you know that there is no such thing as a black person who is a Christian - going to heaven with hatred in their hearts for white people? They cannot go to heaven either. So racism is caused by a Root of Bitterness that will literally bring you into a state of unbelief ( even unbelief that you could lose your salvation over it!) and cause you to lose your eternal life - in heaven- leaving only one place to go. Hell.

How terrible is that? That is why I would advise this young man to RUN not walk away from this relationship.

As Christians we need to walk in forgiveness. If the waitress was in any way a racist? It's her problem and the right answer is to pray for her and ask the LORD to deliver her of it. Are there white waitresses that are racists? Absolutely. Are their black waitresses that are racists? Absolutely. God isn't looking at the color of one's skin. He is looking at the what is inside the heart. That is where we will be judged.

You should guard your heart with all diligence because out of it flow the issues of life. I have to guard my own heart. You'd be surprised how easily the enemy can try to come in with some small suggestion. It is the little foxes that destroy the vine. You have to be vigilant. Cutting off the relationship is being vigilant.

I've never used religion to help people as that is a personal thing. You should never try to talk people out of anything. You have to build a relationship where they trust you and then guide them to the conclusion so it seems as if they thought of it on their own. Its called having influence.

If you guard your heart you will never let anyone in because no one is perfect. What kind of life is that always being safe but never complete?

Racist and racism is 2 different things. No one but whites can practice racism. Anyone can be racist.

 

[Unkotare]

One more thing young man. Wait for a girl who treats you like a king and never raises her voice while speaking to you (ever). ...

In the South, there are women who never raise their voice....

 

[hortysir]

Odds are she'sjust an airhead that doesn't know how to split a check

 

[Unkotare]

Odds are she's just an airhead that doesn't know how to split a check

Odds are the whole poorly-written story is pure bullshshit.

 

[Big Black Dog]

Your girlfriend sounds a bit on the crazy side to me. Give her $2.00 and tell her to hit the road.

 

[ninja007]

troll

 

[Papageorgio]

I have been having a difficult time with this one:

My gf is brown, and I am a white man. We were at a restaurant paying our bill. We split the cost of the meal but had different drinks. My drink was $2 more than hers. After giving our credits cards, we received our respective receipts, but we noticed that a mistake was made: my gf was charged with my more expensive drink, while I had her cheaper one on my bill.

After, my gf claimed that no one could mess such a simple thing up and that this was an act of racism, which she also described as a feeling she had about the white waitress and her tone. I didn't recognize this tone, but I can be aloof.

I said to my gf that it could also just have been an honest mistake, or perhaps there could be another reason for the mistake that is uncertain to us.

She became extremely upset by my insensitivity and yelled at me for two days. I am being as honest as I can with her; I didn't know if we could know that it was racism, but I now have accepted her feelings and instinct as the closest thing I have to the truth because she has felt subtle forms of racism like this in the past.

She ridiculed me for not immediately accepting her intuition as truth.

Any thoughts on this situation?

Thank you,
John

If you were a real man, instead of a cheap bastard, you would have picked up the whole check and this wouldn't be an issue now.

 

[Nutz]

1 post...recruiter. He is looking for vitriolic reaction from racists to PM them and recruit them into whatever hate group he is representing...or the tea party. USMB is a major source for hate groups recruiters.

 

[johnnyfive]

I respect most of the responses here. Thank you!

It has since turned into a bigger issue. I have explained that while I can understand her feelings and instinct, and I know that situations of subtle racism exist - I just can't get myself to to claim that this was racism, definitively. There's only her certainty and my uncertainty left. She continues to berate me for not standing by her whole-heartedly.