Putting the Catholic Church in my rear view window...

Blackrook

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Jun 20, 2014
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I met someone last night.

It was our first date, but something clicked between us and I think she may be the person I spend the rest of my life with.

But, even if it doesn't end up being her, someone will come along eventually because I'm on three dating services and I'm searching very diligently because I hate being alone.

So, it's time to put the Catholic Church in my rear view window.

Now you can say, get an annulment. The Catholic Church offers that.

But I think it's total bullshit to ask the Catholic Church to say I wasn't really married to a woman I spent thirty years with and is the mother of my three children.

I looked into the Episcopalians.

Being an Episcopalian would be like going to a church that looks Catholic in every way, except the priests don't really care if you even believe in God so long as you put money in the basket.

Or I could just not go to any church on Sunday and work things out just between me and God.

Please don't come on this thread and tell me this isn't really a problem.

It's a problem for me.

I've been Catholic all my life and giving up Catholicism would be worse than giving up my right arm.
 
Don't tell them then. How are they going to know and you might have to go to another church. If you feeling guilty then it is a test.
 
Don't tell them then. How are they going to know and you might have to go to another church. If you feeling guilty then it is a test.
The Catholic Church would allow me to attend but not allow me to accept the Eucharist.

That's something I can't accept.
 
Good grief. I did this 50 years ago. A one-sex guy church that never let females in, to the detriment of fully one-half of humanity, an hierarchy that is modeled after an absolute monarchy, all telling the world that they represent the Supreme Being of the Universe? Spare me.
 
Don't tell them then. How are they going to know and you might have to go to another church. If you feeling guilty then it is a test.
Why do you need a church to adjudicate divorces and rights to remarry?
Church fathers, pastors, pimps and preachers consider a marriage annulled if the defendant is deemed “mentally ill” or committed to a mental hospital --- which has the effect of prohibiting a person from possessing firearms and making him or her permanently ineligible to marry in church at all ever according to vice doctrines as enforced by Catholic priests, deacons and rectors.
 
The problem with taking this issue to the forum is that only a person who takes Catholicism seriously would understand the choices I'm faced with.

If you boil it down to terms that a priest would be too scared to tell you, the Catholic answer is that if a Catholic leaves the Church, with full knowledge that the Catholic Church is the true Church, there is no hope that person will go to heaven.

My two choices then are this:

A lifetime of happiness with a woman I love -- then an eternity in hell; or

A lifetime of misery for the next thirty years or so -- then an eternity in heaven.
 
My very liberal Catholic religion teacher said: "The Catholic Church doesn't really teach that you can't remarry after divorce, that would be too hard."

Me, being the bright young man I was, said: "Who says it's supposed to be easy to be Catholic?"
 
A lifetime of happiness with a woman I love -- then an eternity in hell; or
A lifetime of misery for the next thirty years or so -- then an eternity in heaven.

The good news is you're already fucked ... you're going to hell ... either that or ask a priest to forgive you ... but to stay with the Catholics, you'll not be re-marrying, or so I think, please correct me if I'm wrong on that ...

If you want to turn to being a Protestantism ... well, now you'll have to forgive yourself, can't get sanction through a priest ... in some ways this is the more difficult path ... but, if it means money in the plate, you'll be able to re-marry ...

Are your children adults yet? ... they want you back with mom, and they'll hate any woman you choose that makes that impossible ... at least until they're old enough to understand better ... adults ...

You're 50% to blame for the divorce ... and until you fix that 50%, any future relationship will fall apart, and for the same reasons ... you blew it big time ... second chances with God come with a promise to never ever blow it again ... first you have to admit what you did wrong, then you have to forgive yourself, then spend the rest of your life fixing yourself ... did you just recently split the sheets with your wife? ... give yourself a couple of years to recover ... get out and enjoy friendships but leave off the romance for a time ... get yourself centered and grounded ...

Getting away from the Catholic Church is a great first step ... God knows them people piss me off ... you can have a personal relationship with God, anyone who says otherwise hates you, you don't need no damn priest to talk to God for you ...
 
If it is a personal issue why bring it to the forum. What is your motive?

is changing churches a moral issue? is changing ones beliefs a moral issue? is changing religions a moral issue? The issue may be over analyzing the situation. When given two choices, then only one can be chosen and the person has to live with it or let it destroy that person. Got to love choice.
 
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A lifetime of misery for the next thirty years or so -- then an eternity in heaven.

I assume it's because of "And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery." Matthew 19:9

I'd take the above, but I'm not Catholic (only know about Catholicism) nor am I you. I'm assuming you'll have a lifetime of misery for the next thirty years because you're married to someone you don't love anymore. Yeah, I get it. It happens. Also, Matthew is the difficult book. Jesus as Savior was so magnificent and suffered so much for us. I love him, but what he says is difficult to follow. Yes, I am a sinner. However, he thinks I've repented as I was miserable for about a ten years.

Also, Matthew is a tough book and we all face what Jesus said.

In my case, I think I married the wrong woman (a much younger woman). We had two lovely children though, but our marriage fizzled out in seven years. The light burned bright, but it didn't last. I learned afterward that I should've married my girl friend before her. God told me afterward she was the one, but I wasn't Christian at the time. He also told me to cross the street to the other side if I ever see her again somewhere. I assumed this meant don't contact her even though I wanted to after being divorced. As I said, I had to repent for several years and hope to get married again next year. God told me she is the one. However, I don't know if she'll say yes; She lives in another city and I can't see here as often as I like. We're the same age and went to the same high school so I've known her for some time. Yet, I don't want it to be an infatuation. You think I should know if she's the one, but I'm not sure. I'm only following what God told me haha.

If you're going to stay being Catholic, then good luck. I think you'll stick with that and cut it off as it seems important to follow Catholicism.
 
I met someone last night.

It was our first date, but something clicked between us and I think she may be the person I spend the rest of my life with.

But, even if it doesn't end up being her, someone will come along eventually because I'm on three dating services and I'm searching very diligently because I hate being alone.

So, it's time to put the Catholic Church in my rear view window.

Now you can say, get an annulment. The Catholic Church offers that.

But I think it's total bullshit to ask the Catholic Church to say I wasn't really married to a woman I spent thirty years with and is the mother of my three children.

I looked into the Episcopalians.

Being an Episcopalian would be like going to a church that looks Catholic in every way, except the priests don't really care if you even believe in God so long as you put money in the basket.

Or I could just not go to any church on Sunday and work things out just between me and God.

Please don't come on this thread and tell me this isn't really a problem.

It's a problem for me.

I've been Catholic all my life and giving up Catholicism would be worse than giving up my right arm.


Don't worry about the Church my brother. The Church abandoned us a long time ago in order to conform to and be loved by the world. I too have dumped the Catholic Church.
 
A lifetime of happiness with a woman I love -- then an eternity in hell; or

A lifetime of misery for the next thirty years or so -- then an eternity in heaven
If you think in this manner, then you have never been a Christian in reality. So, what is the difference to what formal structure you tie himself?
 
Most in this thread take this as a joke. I can only say I was very involved in a Church, felt really happy with where I was. Slowly but surely I listened to the words coming out of the Pulpit.

All the usual things, if you do not believe as I do you are wrong. abortion, guns are our right, that black man in the WhiteHouse is evil. You need to vote against him. Men should be in control.

I walked out the door, never looked back. If you guessed the Church you are right. I found another that had changed the direction of the old Church teaching Love and caring for each other. Exactly how I feel. No Politics in my Church, just the teachings of Christ.

Why would you feel guilty because someone else told you to? God gave you a conscience to decide what is right for you. No one else! You!
 
If it is a personal issue why bring it to the forum. What is your motive?

is changing churches a moral issue? is changing ones beliefs a moral issue? is changing religions a moral issue? The issue may be over analyzing the situation. When given two choices, then only one can be chosen and the person has to live with it or let it destroy that person. Got to love choice.

I think he is asking for other people who have been in his position. You have to feel right in yourself.
 

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