Is Violence Against Women EVER Justified?

[BluePhantom]

So I was having a discussion with the wife about if and when it is ever ok for a man to hit a women. Now the stereotypical answer is “never”. But is that really realistic? Let me toss out some scenarios where a man hit a women. Each of these I have personally witnessed (no I wasn’t the one doing the hitting) and in each case I felt the girl got exactly what she deserved.

Example 1: A buddy of mine had a girlfriend who made no secret that in her opinion she could hit him as much as she wanted because the moment he dared to hit back he would go to jail instead of her and no court would ever convict a woman of being abusive toward a man. I mean she actually bragged about it. She beat on that guy like a drum constantly until one day he finally had enough and “returned the treatment”. (Note: He would have simply left her but they had a child together and he couldn’t leave the child with an abusive woman until he could prove in court she was abusive – eventually that did happen.)

Example 2: To make a long story short, a beautiful woman stole our table at a crowded bar. My brother asked her politely to leave several times and offered to buy her a drink if she would depart. She refused every time told him “beautiful women only take orders when they feel like it so there’s not much you can do about it is there?” and then she blew smoke in his face. He asked her to leave again and warned her that if she blew smoke in his face again he would punch her dead in the face. She said “oh really? I dare you”, leaned directly into his face and exhaled a cloud of smoke around my brothers head….he broke her nose.

Example 3: A woman stood behind her boyfriend screaming at this other guy calling him every name in the book, making reference to his questionable parentage…I mean you name it and she said it. Her boyfriend stood between them and although he wasn’t being aggressive toward the other guy neither was he telling his girlfriend to shut the hell up either. Finally her boyfriend said “you will have to go through me first to shut her up”. The guy said “I accept your terms” and after he beat the shit out of her boyfriend he walked up to the women and punched her dead in the mouth and told her “you got your boyfriends ass kicked you should share his pain.”

Now as I said…..these were thing I witnessed where I said to myself “normally I would never endorse violence of any kind let alone against women…..but in this case….the bitch was begging for it.”

I welcome thoughts.

 

[del]

walk away

 

[The Infidel]

I dont think you should ever strike a girl.

Believe me, I have wanted to a time or two. I had a bar manager haul off and hit me one night. I called the cops and they took BOTH of us to jail

The judge later threw my case out and I dropped the charges on her, but I hope it taught a thing or two. I found out later she did that shit alot. I was just the first to call her on it

What a bitch!

 

[Intense]

Bad Medicine.

 

[BluePhantom]

walk away

Ahhhhhh but that's not always realistic is it? I mean as men we are taught that when things get too hot to walk away, but society teaches women not to let their man go. Keep him there and keep him communicating. So we try to walk away like we are taught and they often won't let us because that's what they are taught.

 

[FuelRod]

Is ducking a fighting tactic?

 

[BluePhantom]

Is ducking a fighting tactic?

yes, but take my first example in the OP. It's not like the bitch warned him. He finally was able to leave her and get custody of his child because she finally did it in front of a witness (namely me). She walked up behind him and cracked him with a lamp.

 

[SayMyName]

In self-defence.

 

[BluePhantom]

In self-defence.

I agree with you. I count myself as fortunate that I have never been in a situation that got to such a point, but in my opinion confrontation is confrontation and battery is battery. Gender is completely irrelevant. If someone attacks you (man or woman) you have the right to defend yourself using whatever means are necessary. If a man can walk away I agree that's best but I would say that whether the other person is a man or a women. Sometimes though it's just not possible and I don't believe a man should have to "stand there and take it" to avoid public ridicule.

 

[ABikerSailor]

You know, I have never hit a woman with a closed fist except for once, and it was more of a reflex than anything else. I was 15 and my foster sister who was 18 were arguing one day, she turned around and hit me with a hot curling iron. Well, I was in boxing at the time, so when I saw her coming at me, I blocked the curling iron with my right arm (took a nasty burn) and jabbed with my left, hitting her in the chest and knocking the wind out of her.

I never hit a woman after that, because I felt bad about it.

However.............if a woman comes at me, the first thing I'd try to do is walk away, but if she comes after me and attacks? She's just put herself on equal ground and I will defend myself.

Trust me, after 20 years in the Navy and hanging around biker bars, I can tell you that some women are capable of going toe to toe with just about any man.

 

[del]

walk away

Ahhhhhh but that's not always realistic is it? I mean as men we are taught that when things get too hot to walk away, but society teaches women not to let their man go. Keep him there and keep him communicating. So we try to walk away like we are taught and they often won't let us because that's what they are taught.

i've yet to meet a woman who could physically prevent me from walking away if i so choose.

 

[Cecilie1200]

So I was having a discussion with the wife about if and when it is ever ok for a man to hit a women. Now the stereotypical answer is “never”. But is that really realistic? Let me toss out some scenarios where a man hit a women. Each of these I have personally witnessed (no I wasn’t the one doing the hitting) and in each case I felt the girl got exactly what she deserved.

Example 1: A buddy of mine had a girlfriend who made no secret that in her opinion she could hit him as much as she wanted because the moment he dared to hit back he would go to jail instead of her and no court would ever convict a woman of being abusive toward a man. I mean she actually bragged about it. She beat on that guy like a drum constantly until one day he finally had enough and “returned the treatment”. (Note: He would have simply left her but they had a child together and he couldn’t leave the child with an abusive woman until he could prove in court she was abusive – eventually that did happen.)

Example 2: To make a long story short, a beautiful woman stole our table at a crowded bar. My brother asked her politely to leave several times and offered to buy her a drink if she would depart. She refused every time told him “beautiful women only take orders when they feel like it so there’s not much you can do about it is there?” and then she blew smoke in his face. He asked her to leave again and warned her that if she blew smoke in his face again he would punch her dead in the face. She said “oh really? I dare you”, leaned directly into his face and exhaled a cloud of smoke around my brothers head….he broke her nose.

Example 3: A woman stood behind her boyfriend screaming at this other guy calling him every name in the book, making reference to his questionable parentage…I mean you name it and she said it. Her boyfriend stood between them and although he wasn’t being aggressive toward the other guy neither was he telling his girlfriend to shut the hell up either. Finally her boyfriend said “you will have to go through me first to shut her up”. The guy said “I accept your terms” and after he beat the shit out of her boyfriend he walked up to the women and punched her dead in the mouth and told her “you got your boyfriends ass kicked you should share his pain.”

Now as I said…..these were thing I witnessed where I said to myself “normally I would never endorse violence of any kind let alone against women…..but in this case….the bitch was begging for it.”

I welcome thoughts.

The only time physical violence against a woman is acceptable is more or less the same time that physical violence against a man is acceptable: when she's dangerous to you and you can't get away.

Example 1:

The man should have called the police and had her arrested the first time she assaulted him. Contrary to her belief, the police HAVE heard seen this before (although not as often as the reverse, of course). In many states, the police are actually required to take all parties to domestic violence into custody, and sort the matter out at the police station. Once he had official documentation of her physical abusiveness, leaving her and getting custody of their child becomes much easier. Hanging around and letting her continue abusing her until he loses his control is every bit as stupid as when women do it with their abusive husbands and boyfriends.

Example 2:

A table in a restaurant is worth standing there, having a screaming match with the bitch, until it escalates into a physical assault? Really?! Did it occur to him to just walk away and speak to the manager?

Example 3:

Tell the guy you're really sorry about his tiny penis and having to put up with such a bitch, and walk the hell away. Why the hell would you stand there and let her scream abuse at you?

 

[Ravi]

What a stupid thread. You should never hit anyone, let alone women, unless in self-defense.

I get the feeling that this thread is designed to make women look bad.

 

[ABikerSailor]

One of the reasons I'm pretty much against hitting women is because from age 5 until 8, I had to watch my stepfather throw my mother (and me when I tried to defend her) around the house and hit her.

But, that is violence against women. I think the proper question should be "when is it okay to FIGHT with a woman physically"?

 

[BluePhantom]

i've yet to meet a woman who could physically prevent me from walking away if i so choose.

All men may not be as big as you del

 

[BluePhantom]

What a stupid thread. You should never hit anyone, let alone women, unless in self-defense.

I get the feeling that this thread is designed to make women look bad.

You would be wrong. I am not endorsing violence of any kind and I pointed out several times that especially against women I don't endorse it. I am just curious about the stigma that society holds because like with anything I feel there are always exceptions to the rule.

ABS is absolutely correct when he points out that there are those women who have nothing whatsoever to fear from a man in a fist fight. They can take care of themselves just fine. But when two men fight everyone just shrugs their shoulders. When we hear of a man and a woman, I am betting that most men think of this woman:

Well what about this woman:

or this woman:

or this woman:

 

[BluePhantom]

What a stupid thread. You should never hit anyone, let alone women, unless in self-defense.

And it's the "in self-defense" part that is important. I agree with you, but I know a lot of people who say a man shouldn't hit a women even if it is in self-defense.

 

[BluePhantom]

One of the reasons I'm pretty much against hitting women is because from age 5 until 8, I had to watch my stepfather throw my mother (and me when I tried to defend her) around the house and hit her.

But, that is violence against women. I think the proper question should be "when is it okay to FIGHT with a woman physically"?

I think that would be accurate yes

 

[Katzndogz]

Is it ever okay to hit a woman? Sure it is.

Teen girls Emily Starnes and Cosandra Tyree accused in cab driver's death | wtsp.com

 

[BluePhantom]

The only time physical violence against a woman is acceptable is more or less the same time that physical violence against a man is acceptable: when she's dangerous to you and you can't get away.

And I would generally agree. I would agree that in the last two examples the smart thing to do would have been to walk away....but I have pondered this over the years. All three follow the same theme. In the first example we had a woman being abusive because she thought she could get away with it because "she was a woman and he was a man"......isn't that the same thing in the other two examples as well? Weren't the women in the other two examples taking advantage of the fact that they were women in order to "bully" men?