good manners

[strollingbones]

do you have them or not? no this is not a damn quiz. but i am an emily post kinda person.

what do you consider good manners? what are you unsure of when you go out to dinner?
what are you unsure of with thank you cards etc?

how do you think your manners would rate on a scale of 1 to 10...with 10 being emily post?

just how appalling are your manners?

(husband would like to point out that someone who is too lazy to use good grammar etc. should not be posting this...i would rate him a 6 on good manners)

 

[KittenKoder]

Good manners are bullshit ... Penn and Teller proved it in one of their shows to.

 

[strollingbones]

see that is the attitude i am speaking of....i didnt see the penn and teller show...but perhaps that is ...cause i can read a damned book on etiquette...good manners are not bullshit and many time good manners will open doors for you when very little else will...

 

[KittenKoder]

see that is the attitude i am speaking of....i didnt see the penn and teller show...but perhaps that is ...cause i can read a damned book on etiquette...good manners are not bullshit and many time good manners will open doors for you when very little else will...

Common courtesy is very different from "good manners". You would need to watch the show to understand it better, I am just no good at explaining it, but here are some good examples:

Someone asks if they look good in an outfit, they don't they look horrible, do you be good mannered and just smile politely, saying they do or be rude and tell them it's ugly as hell?

When someone nearly hits you with their car and glare at you like it's your fault, do you be good mannered and let them pass or just smirk and ignore the hell our of them?

 

[Annie]

see that is the attitude i am speaking of....i didnt see the penn and teller show...but perhaps that is ...cause i can read a damned book on etiquette...good manners are not bullshit and many time good manners will open doors for you when very little else will...

I have pretty good 'manners.' One of the parents was helping another decorating the bulletin boards in the hallway the other day, came into my room when she heard me say, "Ok, start on your homework, please."

She and another mom were laughing, seems the could hear me talking with the kids, "Good point, can someone else expand and correct so and so's answer? Thank you"

"Danielle, this is the third time I've asked you, be quiet PLEASE!"

"Joe, would you please open the window? Thank you."

Ok, let's close the books and please take out pens for the quiz. Nikki, please pass out the quiz." As Nikki did, the others said, 'Thank you.'

And THAT"S what cracked up the moms, the kids were thanking another for giving them a quiz! It rubs off. I find it also makes for less power struggles between the kids and myself, a very good thing in middle school. It costs nothing to add a please and thank you. When done so consistently, if one of them is acting up and I say, "That was rude and hurtful, you need to apologize and change that behavior..." They usually accept that. When I tell them to hold the door for the next person, they do. I've heard them on patrol telling younger students, "Hold the door for the next person, it's only polite!"

 

[strollingbones]

kitty...i would rather go..perhaps you can wear something else or try on something else....i would much rather do that.....than let her appear in public looking like shit

 

[strollingbones]

how hard is a please and thank you.

 

[KittenKoder]

kitty...i would rather go..perhaps you can wear something else or try on something else....i would much rather do that.....than let her appear in public looking like shit

My real life friend would never trust me again if I said that LOL ...

 

[editec]

I try to be polite.

Why?

Because showing good manners is a form of respect for the other, and being polite just tends to make human interaction go smoother.

A little courtesy won't kill you.

 

[RodISHI]

Thnak you's, please and welcomes go a long ways. Manners at a dinner table depends on the company your in. I am rarely around the formal crowd. So my table manner probably suck. I still cut my steak up into bites before I eat. It is a habit I still have from when my children were little.

While driving in their cars I beleive people can have some of the worst manners. Who wants to here another persons music five cars down. And courtesy goes out the window for a lot of folks out on the road. I think that is why they had to make it law here that one must pull into the farthest lane away from a stopped vehicle along side the road.

I've been rude at times in my life to a few. A guy stopped and helped me get a flat tire off once. It was a good thing as I needed the help and had no clue how to run the jack or change a tire. Afterwards he even help me get the tire from the car into the back of my pickup. The guy kind a freaked me out though when he started asking personal questions. At the point I had already said thank you a half a dozen times and was in my pickup and trying to get out of there I was still telling the guy thank you and he was standing there by my drivers window still hanging around. I finally said thank you again and added, "Well if I ever see you broke down maybe I can help you." He said, "Well my truck's broken now." I said, "Oh, what does it need?" He said, "A kiss." I said, "I'm sorry mister I don't kiss trucks." And I had already started the pickup by then so I pulled it in gear and gunned it to get out of there.

The next day I'm sharing my tire changing adventure with my mom and grandmother at breakfast. My grandmother says, "Your terrible." I asked her, "What, someone stops to help you and they did not do it out of the goodness of there heart. then they expect something from you and I am the terrible one." She says, "Yes". I said, "Okay, so if someone asked me to dinner I probably owe them a piece of ass or something." She said, "Yes. You owe them something". I told her well they are S.O.L if they think they are getting anything besides my good company.

Just goes to show how thoughts can change between generations on what's proper and not proper.

 

[strollingbones]

even if he says "please pass the pussy?"

 

[RodISHI]

even if he says "please pass the pussy?"

I've never heard that particular line but I doubt it would have gotten them very far

 

[editec]

People with good manners are not necessarily the same thing as good people.

Haven't we all met the type of people who have impeccable manners yet who are also complete pricks?

Good manners are, at least as I see them, merely that social lubricant which works best in those day-to-day interactions of little consequence as long as they hum along smoothly.

I'm very polite to clerks and waitresses and so forth.

But to those people with whom I am truly interacting, kindness means far more than correctness.

Politeness is about setting boundries between people

Kindness is about expanding those boundries to include people.

There's no hard and fast line between good manner and kindness, of course, because real human interactions are far too complex for a set of rules that will always apply.

 

[Korimyr the Rat]

do you have them or not? no this is not a damn quiz. but i am an emily post kinda person.

I have very good social manners. I say "please" and "thank you" and "excuse me", I call people I don't know "sir" or "ma'am" or "miss", and I use peoples' proper titles until they invite me to use their given names. I open doors for people and offer to help carry groceries and get cars unstuck from the snow. I try to avoid using vulgar language, especially around women and children.

My table manners are well below average. I chew with my mouth closed and I do not engage in bodily functions at the table. But I am not accustomed to dining with others, so I tend to eat too quickly without taking time to converse, and I hover protectively over my food until I'm finished eating. I also tend to pick bones, eat garnishes, and use my bread to sop up sauces and juices. I try very hard not to be disgusting, and I think I succeed, but I can't really focus on anything but eating until I'm done eating.

 

[KittenKoder]

Bah! I have bad manners, and those who don't like it don't have to be around me ... that's all there is to it. Actually, I have good manners just not what most areas in the US consider good manners, I have "grunge" good manners. Where I grew up, they are perfect manners, but elsewhere we are considered very rude.

 

[random3434]

You can tell the character of someone on how they treat others, such as service people, waiters/waitress/bartenders, maids, janitors, sales clerks, etc.

Good manners applies at all times, no matter who is watching.

 

[manu1959]

kitty...i would rather go..perhaps you can wear something else or try on something else....i would much rather do that.....than let her appear in public looking like shit

My real life friend would never trust me again if I said that LOL ...

if she asked you and you said she looked fine and then went out in public and another friend said what were you thinking you would be toast.....

when my wife asks i tell her.....friends want the truth....

 

[HUGGY]

Bah! I have bad manners, and those who don't like it don't have to be around me ... that's all there is to it. Actually, I have good manners just not what most areas in the US consider good manners, I have "grunge" good manners. Where I grew up, they are perfect manners, but elsewhere we are considered very rude.

See Kitty. THAT is the difference between a native of Seattle and those that have come here after they have learned bad habits.

Yesterday I was driving down to the airport and the first avenue bridge went up over the duamish river. This bridge can take up to twenty minutes and it did yesterday. My point is that traffic was backed up almost a mile and being in front I got out of my cadilac until the bridge went down. Quiet..no horns. In any other city in the country some asshole would be mindlessly honking for traffic to move..not here.

I love this town. When I travel I have to come back sometimes just for the piece of mind.

There was a serious accident on the viaduct (an elevated part of hywy 99 ) and the cars were taking turns getting around the two blocked lanes without a hitch and this without the aid of a cop. This is normal not the exception.

Any that have seen my opinion of jews probably think I am a total asshole. OK but from my point of view a community that is polite and forgiving means more to me than you could know. That is why I hate rude people. It cuts me to the quick. That is why I hate you Kitty for being the rude little bitch that you are with you going on and on about the stupid monorail. That is why you claiming a voice for my city is crap. You are part of the problem...not the solution. You that are trained poorly should learn ...no never mind...it is more than training...here it is something you are born with.

I wish everyone could have been born here. It isn't the location like some lame my city is better than your town.. Seattle is actually from my experience the nicest ...most polite town in the U S. Did I say I love this town?

 

[manu1959]

Bah! I have bad manners, and those who don't like it don't have to be around me ... that's all there is to it. Actually, I have good manners just not what most areas in the US consider good manners, I have "grunge" good manners. Where I grew up, they are perfect manners, but elsewhere we are considered very rude.

See Kitty. THAT is the difference between a native of Seattle and those that have come here after they have learned bad habits.

Yesterday I was driving down to the airport and the first avenue bridge went up over the duamish river. This bridge can take up to twenty minutes and it did yesterday. My point is that traffic was backed up almost a mile and being in front I got out of my cadilac until the bridge went down. Quiet..no horns. In any other city in the country some asshole would be mindlessly honking for traffic to move..not here.

I love this town. When I travel I have to come back sometimes just for the piece of mind.

There was a serious accident on the viaduct (an elevated part of hywy 99 ) and the cars were taking turns getting around the two blocked lanes without a hitch and this without the aid of a cop. This is normal not the exception.

Any that have seen my opinion of jews probably think I am a total asshole. OK but from my point of view a community that is polite and forgiving means more to me than you could know. That is why I hate rude people. It cuts me to the quick. That is why I hate you Kitty for being the rude little bitch that you are with you going on and on about the stupid monorail. That is why you claiming a voice for my city is crap. You are part of the problem...not the solution. You that are trained poorly should learn ...no never mind...it is more than training...here it is something you are born with.

I wish everyone could have been born here. It isn't the location like some lame my city is better than your town.. Seattle is actually from my experience the nicest ...most polite town in the U S. Did I say I love this town?

shocking i tell you ..... shocking......

 

[HUGGY]

Bah! I have bad manners, and those who don't like it don't have to be around me ... that's all there is to it. Actually, I have good manners just not what most areas in the US consider good manners, I have "grunge" good manners. Where I grew up, they are perfect manners, but elsewhere we are considered very rude.

See Kitty. THAT is the difference between a native of Seattle and those that have come here after they have learned bad habits.

Yesterday I was driving down to the airport and the first avenue bridge went up over the duamish river. This bridge can take up to twenty minutes and it did yesterday. My point is that traffic was backed up almost a mile and being in front I got out of my cadilac until the bridge went down. Quiet..no horns. In any other city in the country some asshole would be mindlessly honking for traffic to move..not here.

I love this town. When I travel I have to come back sometimes just for the piece of mind.

There was a serious accident on the viaduct (an elevated part of hywy 99 ) and the cars were taking turns getting around the two blocked lanes without a hitch and this without the aid of a cop. This is normal not the exception.

Any that have seen my opinion of jews probably think I am a total asshole. OK but from my point of view a community that is polite and forgiving means more to me than you could know. That is why I hate rude people. It cuts me to the quick. That is why I hate you Kitty for being the rude little bitch that you are with you going on and on about the stupid monorail. That is why you claiming a voice for my city is crap. You are part of the problem...not the solution. You that are trained poorly should learn ...no never mind...it is more than training...here it is something you are born with.

I wish everyone could have been born here. It isn't the location like some lame my city is better than your town.. Seattle is actually from my experience the nicest ...most polite town in the U S. Did I say I love this town?

shocking i tell you ..... shocking......

Hey an el dorado is a smooth ride. I don't really hate kitty. It just chaps my hide that this neurotic shut in thinks she has her finger on the pulse of my town. She is into grunge...grunge is amplified whining. Whaaaaa...I don't fit in... so I'm gonna scream and yell and make your life miserable..

I feel the same way about rap. BaBOOM...baBOOM..You can feel the vibration a block away..hey pal I really don't want to listen to your stupid hip hop bullshit...How many times have I said those words...if I only had a nickle for every time..