Why do people think that polygamy is inherently abusive?

[Bonzi]

Please quote me a scripture that says "Up to 4 wives" is part of a divine plan. thanks,

Quran 4:3 "You may marry two, three, or four. If you fear lest you become unfair, then you shall be content with only one, or with what you already have. Additionally, you are thus more likely to avoid financial hardship."

Hard to come up with a "winner" debating from 2 different records of authority.
will have to agree to disagree here...

 

[evince]

you both believe myths instead of facts

 

[Sunni Man]

you both believe myths instead of facts

The only "fact" I see here is that you are a faggot and a troll. .....

 

[Sunni Man]

Hard to come up with a "winner" debating from 2 different records of authority.
will have to agree to disagree here...

On the issue of polygamy.....both the O.T. and the Quran agree that God has no problem with it.. .....

 

[evince]

you both believe myths instead of facts

The only "fact" I see here is that you are a faggot and a troll. .....

you are an evil fucking tard


the world hates you

 

[Pedro de San Patricio]

]When a girl is born.......she belongs to her father.

When she grows up into a woman and marries.......she belongs to her husband. ...

Wait, wait, wait. Hold up. You think your children belong to you?

 

[Sunni Man]

you are an evil fucking tard

the world hates you

Having a bad day hemorrhoid breath?? ....

 

[Sunni Man]

Wait, wait, wait. Hold up. You think your children belong to you?

100% .....

 

[Pedro de San Patricio]

Wait, wait, wait. Hold up. You think your children belong to you?

100% .....

It might just be a cultural difference, but at least here we recognize that a human cannot own another human. Humans are not property.

 

[Sunni Man]

It might just be a cultural difference, but at least here we recognize that a human cannot own another human. Humans are not property.

I am a US citizen who was born in America.

My children are my property.

I don't know any American's who believe otherwise. ....

 

[Pedro de San Patricio]

Can we prove this guy wrong, please? Anyone else willing to say that children aren't property?

 

[Sunni Man]

If my child misbehaves in school.......They call me......Why?........Because the child belongs to me......I own him.......I'm expected to control my property.

If my child throws a baseball and breaks the neighbor's window.......They send me the bill to have it replaced.......Why?......Because my child, who is my property broke it......I'm responsible for his actions.

 

[Pedro de San Patricio]

They call you because you are your child's guardian. You and your wife created a brand new human being together. The two of you are now expected to provide the love, education, and material needs necessary for your child to grow up into a functional and happy citizen. This does not in any way make you your child's owner, because people are not and cannot be property. It does makes you responsible for providing a standard of living.

 

[WinterBorn]

History demonstrates polygamy is usually abusive.

That's why people believe it's inherently abusive.

Considering the huge difference between "history" and modern times, as far as relationships go, this is laughable.

Historically, women were the property of the husband.

Historically, the husband could legally beat his wife.

And since 1 in 4 women will experience domestic violence in their life, abuse is far too rampant to be blamed on polygamy.

 

[WinterBorn]

If my child misbehaves in school.......They call me......Why?........Because the child belongs to me......I own him.......I'm expected to control my property.

If my child throws a baseball and breaks the neighbor's window.......They send me the bill to have it replaced.......Why?......Because my child, who is my property broke it......I'm responsible for his actions.

If you OWN the child, you can destroy it any time you want. That is obviously not the case. There is a difference between being responsible for, and owning.

 

[DollyLongstaff]

I should probably define some terms first. "Polygamy" is actually gender neutral in meaning. It just means a marital arrangement between more than two people. The gendered forms are "polygyny" (multiple wives) and "polyandry" (multiple husbands). Both forms have been practiced since before recorded history, with polygyny being more common than polyandry. None of these terms specify anything about the relationship beyond that it involves a marriage and the gender and number of participants. Despite this, there's this strong tendency in our society for people to think all polygamy is polygyny and all polygynous marriages are abusive. It doesn't seem to occur to these people that saying this isn't really different than saying that all two person arrangements are oppressive. It just sounds... silly, honestly. What is it that causes people to think this? Why do they think it suddenly stops being about love just because there's an additional loved one involved?

Two things to consider.
One, there are not enough eligible men to go around, so polygamy has its place in society.
Secondly, now that marriage equality is the law of the land, gay men will no longer need to marry beards.

 

[Sunni Man]

Men own their wives and children.

It's just the natural order. ....

 

[strollingbones]

why is it always talked about from the view of the man with two wives or more....why not women with one or more hubbies.....it happens...

 

[WinterBorn]

Men own their wives and children.

It's just the natural order. ....

If you want to believe that, feel free.

But in a civilized society, one person does not own another. And under the law you idea is nonsense.

 

[WinterBorn]

why is it always talked about from the view of the man with two wives or more....why not women with one or more hubbies.....it happens...

I have some experience with polyamory. There are plenty of women in relationships with two men. In fact, for the 40+ crowd, it makes more sense.