The Mindless Thread

[App'z]

A bakery owner hires a young female shop assistant who liked to wear
very short skirts and thong panties.
One day a young man enters the store, glances at the shop assistant
and at the loaves of bread behind the counter.

Noticing her short skirt and the location of the raisin bread, he has
a brilliant idea. "I'd like some raisin bread please," the man says.
The shop assistant nods and climbs up a ladder to reach the raisin
bread located on the very top shelf.

The man standing almost directly beneath her is provided with an
excellent view, just as he thought.
When she descends the ladder, he decides that he had better get two loaves.
As the shop assistant retrieves the second loaf of bread, one of the other male
customers notices what's going on and requests his own loaf of raisin bread.

After many trips she is tired and irritated and begins to wonder,
"Why the unusual interest in the raisin bread?"
Atop the ladder one more time, she looks down and glares at the men standing
below. Then, she notices an elderly man standing amongst the crowd.

Thinking that she can save herself another trip, she yells at the
elderly man, "Is it raisin for you too?"
"No," he stammers, "But it's quiverin' a little."

____________________________________________________

 

[App'z]

...( all of ) .....

 

[Leo123]

Some mindless is good. Too much useless mindfulness is bad.

 

[App'z]

↑ ... Well, that was more-less useless! ...

Fish stories are funny, maybe boring or stretched out for way too long.

The Guy and the Blind singer are talking at the bar:
"You play golf!?" asks the Pro and the blind Singer says,
"Yes, I have been playing for years."
"But I thought you were blind.
how can you play golf if you are blind?" Jack asks. "

I get my caddie to stand in the middle of the fairway and he calls to me.
I listen for the sound of his voice and play the ball towards him,
then when I get to where the ball lands the caddie moves to the green
or further down the fairway and again I play the ball towards his voice," explains Stevie.

"But how do you putt?" Jack wondered. "Well," says Stevie,
"I get my caddie to lean down in front of the hole and
call to me with his head on the ground and
I just play the ball to the sound of his voice."

Jack says, "What is your handicap?"
"Well, I play off scratch," Stevie assures Jack.
Nicklaus is incredulous and says to Stevie, "We must play a game sometime."
Wonder replies, "Well, people don't take me seriously, so I only play for money,
and I never play for less than $100,000 a hole."

Nicklaus thinks it over and says, "OK, I'm up for that.
When would you like to play?"
"I don't care - any night next week is OK with me."

_____________________________________________________

 

[Leo123]

To quiet mindless thinking one must become mindless without mindfulness.

 

[App'z]

App's announced today that it has developed a breast implant
that can store and play music.

The " iTit " will cost from $499 to $699,
depending on cup size,
speaker size, and storage capacity.

This is considered a major social breakthrough,
because women are always complaining about
men staring at their breasts and not listening to them.

__________________________________

 

[App'z]

 

[Michelle420]

 

[Michelle420]

 

[Michelle420]

 

[App'z]

Everyone was seated around the table
as the food was being served.

When little Logan received his plate,
he started eating right away.

"Logan, wait until we say our prayer,"
his mother reminded him.
"I don't have to," the little boy replied.

"Of course you do," his mother insisted,
"we say a prayer before eating at our house."
"That's at our house,"

"This is Grandma's house; she knows how to cook."

 

[Michelle420]

Ariana Maddox ----Scandoval

 

[Michelle420]

Real Housewives of Salt Lake City lol

 

[App'z]

A blind man decides to go to Texas. When he bords the plane, he felt the seats and said,
"Wow, these seats are big!" The person next to him answered, "Everything is big in Texas."

When they land in Texas, he decides to visit a bar. Upon arriving in the bar, he ordered a beer
and get a mug placed between his hands. He exclaimed, "Wow these mugs are big!"

The bartender replied, "Everything is big in Texas."

After a couple of beers, the blind man asks the bartender where the bathroom was located.
The bartender replies, "Second door to the right." The blind man headed for the bathroom,
but accidentally tripped and passes the second door. Instead, he enters the third door,
which leads to the swimming pool and falls into the pool by accident.

The blind man starts screaming, "Don't flush it, don't flush it!"

_____________________________

 

[Michelle420]

 

[App'z]

Three elderly Ladies are talking about their grandchild.
"I would like my grandchild to say,
"He was successful in business," declared the first.
I want him to say, "He was a loyal family man."
The third one says, "I want him to say,"
"She certainly looks good for her age !"

 

[Michelle420]

 

[App'z]

 

[App'z]

 

[App'z]

what did you expect!