Would You Cheat on a Spouse?

[007]

When you get married there is a whole hell of a lot of things you shouldn't do anymore !

That's why I've been single for going on 22 years... I still want to do what I want to do.

More than likely you'll die single. Many of us who are married will stay true to our spouses and die single.

Maybe, single in the sense that I won't be marriad. But I do have a girl friend. She has her own place and I have mine. For now that's good.

 

[dilloduck]

I've done it. Divorced someone I loved.

and ???????????

 

[tigerbob]

No, that's just generally an ego blow.

Does an ego blow count as sex?

Leave it to a man to focus on only one word out of the entire sentence...

Busted!

God gave us a brain and a dick, but...

 

[Sky Dancer]

He died. End of story.

 

[Dis]

Bullshit nothing. If your marriage is to the point where you're dropping ultimatums such as "if you don't put out, I'm going elsewhere", rather than talking/working through it, then your marriage IS done, and you should just get the divorce, rather than staying married.

People stay married for a ton of reasons besides just sex. If one spouse isn't into having sex, the other spouse should be open about his/her needs, and deal with it honestly, rather than cheating. Better that than pretending things are fine and going behind the person's back, dishonestly.

That was my point.. You should try first. If trying fails, then just get the divorce rather than dropping ultimatums. They just make everything worse.

 

[Care4all]

When my grandmother was 79 and my grandpa was 90 years old, (he was 11 years older than her and they were married 65 years before he passed on),anyway my grandmother was telling my mom that grandpa was trying to have sex with her every morning and that she was fending him off by telling him it was not his "magic" that was making "it" that way, that he was just waking up 'piss hard' and she was refusing to have sex with him.....i kid you NOT!!!! hahahahahahaha! ( I can't believe my grandma even talked about sex, or even had it....ever... and her children had to have been just miracles so when my mom was giggling and telling me about grandma's complaints...I was just thrown!!!!)

So the question is, should my grandpa have cheated on my grandma cuz she was refusing, when he was 90 and she approaching 80, and would that have been ok?

 

[catzmeow]

God, I hope I'm still having sex when I'm 90.

 

[Care4all]

God, I hope I'm still having sex when I'm 90.

I KNOW!!!!

and Viagra wasn't even available back then! Must be his Italian Blood!!!!!

 

[Gunny]

Where does a marriage contract say that a spouse has to put out or else on demand?

I don't see where anyone said anyone has to put out "on demand." That isn't the discussion at all.

The discussion is "no more sex."

In both cases, courts have made legal rulings. The woman has the right to say no to sex and it means no. I say that only because I have never heard of a court case where the man refused, but one would assume it applies both ways.

Courts also rule that a refusal to have sex at all is grounds for a divorce.

In other words, your sudden shift in topic is covered by law and there is no argument from a legal standpoint.

 

[Gunny]

People stay married for a ton of reasons besides just sex. If one spouse isn't into having sex, the other spouse should be open about his/her needs, and deal with it honestly, rather than cheating. Better that than pretending things are fine and going behind the person's back, dishonestly.

How can one spouse deny the other sex and continue to expect fidelity ?

In sickness and in health until death do us part. Does a wife dump her husband and start shagging someone else when he has prostate cancer? What about mental illness or normal aging?

Do you dump the man or woman you love for improved body parts?

Again, you're tossing in junk that changes the discussion. The discussion is "no more sex," given as an ultimatum from one partner to the other.

That is unilaterally changing the relationship. Hardly what I would call a 50-50, partnership decision.

If one decides "no more sex," then, IMO, the one making that decision should have NO problem with the other fulfilling that need elsewhere and cheating shouldn't be an issue.

"Can't" perform is a completely separate issue.

 

[Gunny]

If a spouse is ill and dying, it wouldn't be so surprising to see the husband or wife of the terminally ill or dying spouse seek comfort. Would you condemn that individual?

Yep. In a heartbeat. Again, nothing to do with the parameters of the discussion, but under this particular circumstance, I can easily see condemning that person's behavior.

 

[Care4all]

I know if you do not consummate your marriage that is grounds for divorce/annulment, so sex is implied in marriage.

I am not certain though, if after consummation, if sex is then required or grounds for divorce if it does not take place, i would imagine this would be state law, if it is a law?

 

[Gunny]

I know if you do not consummate your marriage that is grounds for divorce/annulment, so sex is implied in marriage.

I am not certain though, if after consummation, if sex is then required or grounds for divorce if it does not take place, i would imagine this would be state law, if it is a law?

I'm sure it is individual state laws. I don't even recall the specifics, nor even where I was living at the time, but there was a case I recall hearing about where the divorce was granted because the woman decided to quit putting out after the fact.

 

[jillian]

I know if you do not consummate your marriage that is grounds for divorce/annulment, so sex is implied in marriage.

I am not certain though, if after consummation, if sex is then required or grounds for divorce if it does not take place, i would imagine this would be state law, if it is a law?

I'm sure it is individual state laws. I don't even recall the specifics, nor even where I was living at the time, but there was a case I recall hearing about where the divorce was granted because the woman decided to quit putting out after the fact.

NY law says that refusing sex for a period of one year or more constitutes constructive abandonment and is grounds for divorce.

 

[editec]

I've done it. Divorced someone I loved.

Sometimes love is just not enough to keep two people together.

 

[dilloduck]

I know if you do not consummate your marriage that is grounds for divorce/annulment, so sex is implied in marriage.

I am not certain though, if after consummation, if sex is then required or grounds for divorce if it does not take place, i would imagine this would be state law, if it is a law?

I'm sure it is individual state laws. I don't even recall the specifics, nor even where I was living at the time, but there was a case I recall hearing about where the divorce was granted because the woman decided to quit putting out after the fact.

NY law says that refusing sex for a period of one year or more constitutes constructive abandonment and is grounds for divorce.

Once a year seems to be a pretty easy feat to accomplish. How do you prove it in court ?

 

[jillian]

I'm sure it is individual state laws. I don't even recall the specifics, nor even where I was living at the time, but there was a case I recall hearing about where the divorce was granted because the woman decided to quit putting out after the fact.

NY law says that refusing sex for a period of one year or more constitutes constructive abandonment and is grounds for divorce.

Once a year seems to be a pretty easy feat to accomplish. How do you prove it in court ?

You prove it by your testimony. But NY doesn't have "no fault" divorce, so that's what most people allege in their complaints. And every so often, the person suing was the one who stopped having sex with the other... so they don't get the divorce... which means they can't get the property of the marriage divided.

 

[007]

I know if you do not consummate your marriage that is grounds for divorce/annulment, so sex is implied in marriage.

I am not certain though, if after consummation, if sex is then required or grounds for divorce if it does not take place, i would imagine this would be state law, if it is a law?

After all, I have heard having sex with your spouse called your "duty."

 

[dilloduck]

NY law says that refusing sex for a period of one year or more constitutes constructive abandonment and is grounds for divorce.

Once a year seems to be a pretty easy feat to accomplish. How do you prove it in court ?

You prove it by your testimony. But NY doesn't have "no fault" divorce, so that's what most people allege in their complaints. And every so often, the person suing was the one who stopped having sex with the other... so they don't get the divorce... which means they can't get the property of the marriage divided.

Most people allege they haven't had sex for a year ? Poor planning if they thought they were gonig to get their share of the loot.

 

[random3434]

I've done it. Divorced someone I loved.

Sometimes love is just not enough to keep two people together.

Truer words were never spoken editec.