Two-Parent Families Make A Difference

Adam's Apple

Senior Member
Apr 25, 2004
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Examples of children's deaths like those cited in this article appear in our daily newspaper every single week. It's a real tragedy.

Child Tragedies: Missing Marriage
By W. Bradford Wilcox
Printed in the New York Post, February 8, 2006

Seven shocking child deaths in the last four months: Liyah Atkinson, Quachaun Browne, Nixzmary Brown, Josiah Bunch, Dahquay Gillians, Sierra Roberts, Michael Segarra. This staggering death toll from abuse or neglect has focused justifiable attention on malfeasance at the city's Administration for Children's Services. But another thread tragically links these kids: All were living outside of an intact, married family.

Four-year-old Quachaun Browne died at the hands of his mother's controlling, 18-year-old live-in boyfriend. One-year-old baby Josiah Bunch also appears to have died at the hands of a mother's boyfriend. Nixzmary Brown, 7, was beaten to death by her domineering step-father. Three infants, Liyah Atkinson, Dahquay Gillians, and Michael Segarra, died in the custody of their unmarried mothers, apparently by accident. Sierra Roberts, 7, was killed when her single father lost his temper. And so it goes.

For all the heartbreaking media coverage, almost no stories have mentioned that children are much more likely to die outside of an intact, married home than they are to die inside an intact, married home.

Consider the empirical evidence. A recent study in the journal Pediatrics found that preschool children in homes with an unrelated adult were nearly 50 times as likely to die because of physical abuse, compared to children in intact, married homes.

In a recent report, "Why Marriage Matters: 26 Conclusions from the Social Sciences," an interdisciplinary team of 16 family scholars that I chaired found that children in single-parent homes are almost twice as likely to be sexually abused, compared to children in intact, married families.

for full article:
http://www.americanvalues.org/html/child_tragedies.htm
 
According to studies, children are 20 times more likely to be abused, sexually or otherwise by their mothers' boyfriends or step fathers than by their own fathers..

Gloria Steinem and Betty Friedan have the blood of those kids on their hands, too.
 
To the people who just concluded this from their study I have one thing to say:

"Oh your powers of deduction are exceptional. I simply can't allow you to waste them here while there are so many crimes going unsolved at this very moment. Go! Go! For the good of the city"

I cant believe it took a study to get people to figure out that two parents are good.
 
Avatar4321 said:
To the people who just concluded this from their study I have one thing to say:

"Oh your powers of deduction are exceptional. I simply can't allow you to waste them here while there are so many crimes going unsolved at this very moment. Go! Go! For the good of the city"

I cant believe it took a study to get people to figure out that two parents are good.


Some people just love to get published and publishers like to print things that support thier agendas------ additionally, science doesn't accept common sense to be valid until it has gone under thier scrutiny.
 
The sad thing about all this is that the people who could benefit most from the findings of that study never will. They will just keep making those same old mistakes over and over again. Too bad the children they bring into the world aren't removed from their care at birth.
 
Adam's Apple said:
The sad thing about all this is that the people who could benefit most from the findings of that study never will. They will just keep making those same old mistakes over and over again. Too bad the children they bring into the world aren't removed from their care at birth.

I think its a shame that people dont seem to realize that their choices effect not only themselves but especially their children. its a shame because people seem to be totally careless nowadays.

This is also why it rubs me the wrong way when people say no one is being hurt by premarital sex or any other sexual misuse. They say its a private matter. It is to a point. But that intimacy also effects the lives of Generations of people that follow that. If you are careless it will likely mean there will be children with serious problems because of neglect. its a crying shame people dont understand that our choices, even our private ones do effect society.
 
Let's not automatically assume that EVERY child from a divorced family is doomed.

I would never agree to someone having a live-in boyfriend/girlfriend with their kids in the same house. A terrible message to send.

However, there are many families that have the "step-parenty" dynamic, and the good realtionship with the "ex" where the kids are doing just fine.

I would even dare say that there are people on the board who have "step-parents" who have turned out just fine.
 
GotZoom said:
Let's not automatically assume that EVERY child from a divorced family is doomed.

I would never agree to someone having a live-in boyfriend/girlfriend with their kids in the same house. A terrible message to send.

However, there are many families that have the "step-parenty" dynamic, and the good realtionship with the "ex" where the kids are doing just fine.

I would even dare say that there are people on the board who have "step-parents" who have turned out just fine.


...in fact, I Like my step-dad more than my own mother.

:D
 
GotZoom said:
Let's not automatically assume that EVERY child from a divorced family is doomed.

I would never agree to someone having a live-in boyfriend/girlfriend with their kids in the same house. A terrible message to send.

However, there are many families that have the "step-parenty" dynamic, and the good realtionship with the "ex" where the kids are doing just fine.

I would even dare say that there are people on the board who have "step-parents" who have turned out just fine.

My parents are still married to each other and neither one has an 'ex.'

I'm such a freak.

It would be funny if it's wasn't so true.
 
GotZoom said:
Let's not automatically assume that EVERY child from a divorced family is doomed.

I would never agree to someone having a live-in boyfriend/girlfriend with their kids in the same house. A terrible message to send.

However, there are many families that have the "step-parenty" dynamic, and the good realtionship with the "ex" where the kids are doing just fine.

I would even dare say that there are people on the board who have "step-parents" who have turned out just fine.
My sister has a psycho ex. Her present husband has been a very stablizing influence on her son.

However, her son is still dealing with the pain of "Why didn't my dad...."
 
GotZoom said:
Let's not automatically assume that EVERY child from a divorced family is doomed.

Good point, Zoom, but I think it was the unhealthy relationships that the study had in mind--the kind where kids get killed, abused, neglected, etc.

I also know of second marriages with "yours, mine and ours" that have worked out just fine, but there's many that don't. This is the kind that end up with a horror story on the front pages of the newspaper every day/week.
It's becoming a national tragedy.
 
mom4 said:
My sister has a psycho ex. Her present husband has been a very stablizing influence on her son.

However, her son is still dealing with the pain of "Why didn't my dad...."


I've often wondered the lesser of a couple evils:

The Evil of "Why do my parents sleep in different rooms?" vs. "Why did daddy leave?"

:(
 
We all know it comes down to the responsibility and "class" of the two parents. I seriously wonder about these "parents" of the kids who end up as a sad story. What kind of parents are they in the first place? How involved, etc?

I also wonder the education and income level. You have to consider race also.
 
dmp said:
I've often wondered the lesser of a couple evils:

The Evil of "Why do my parents sleep in different rooms?" vs. "Why did daddy leave?"

:(
My sister's choice was clearer... "Why does Daddy curse my mother, hit her, burn her Christian books, isolate her from her family, cheat on her, refuse her grocery money so he can buy rounds at the bar for strangers, yet throw raving fits about the fact that she is seeing her education through so she can bring in money, and either scream at or ignore me?" V/S "Why did Mommy leave?"

I think she chose wisely.
 
GotZoom said:
We all know it comes down to the responsibility and "class" of the two parents. I seriously wonder about these "parents" of the kids who end up as a sad story. What kind of parents are they in the first place? How involved, etc?

I also wonder the education and income level. You have to consider race also.
Educated, rich, white people can be just as selfish as uneducated, poor black people. Or vice versa, et cetera.
 
mom4 said:
My sister's choice was clearer... "Why does Daddy curse my mother, hit her, burn her Christian books, isolate her from her family, cheat on her, refuse her grocery money so he can buy rounds at the bar for strangers, yet throw raving fits about the fact that she is seeing her education through so she can bring in money, and either scream at or ignore me?" V/S "Why did Mommy leave?"

I think she chose wisely.


I do as well. :-/

:(
 
mom4 said:
Educated, rich, white people can be just as selfish as uneducated, poor black people. Or vice versa, et cetera.

Absolutely agree. I am wondering about this guy's research though.

I would find it interesting to see the education, income, and racial make up of the people he researched.

All people can be abusive and a P.O.S. No doubt.
 
Hobbit said:
My parents are still married to each other and neither one has an 'ex.'

I'm such a freak.
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Guess I'm a freak right along with ya then. My parents and in-laws are both married with no ex's and both sets of grandparents.

I"m in my 30's and when I was growing up 90% of the adults I knew weren't divorced. Now my daughter is always talking about which friend's parents are divorcing. SAD.
 
Not to throw a grenade into this thread, but this particular study highlights one of the pro-traditional marriage arguments: a home with a married mother and father is much better for children than other family arrangements, from stepparents to live-in lovers.
 
Trigg said:
Guess I'm a freak right along with ya then. My parents and in-laws are both married with no ex's and both sets of grandparents.

I"m in my 30's and when I was growing up 90% of the adults I knew weren't divorced. Now my daughter is always talking about which friend's parents are divorcing. SAD.

Yeah, I know what you mean. More of my friends than not have divorced parents.
 

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