DGS49
Diamond Member
There are two factions in the family with whom I grew up (I'm the youngest of five, now aged 85-75), and the Trump phenomenon has, like the dye injected into many biological Petrie dishes, highlighted the differences in the two camps. While we have not talked about politics much over the years, the conflict of 2016 more or less demanded it.
A family reunion in Holland, Michigan brought "everyone" together in one spot, and the primaries were finally over, with HRC and Trump the actual nominees. I was never a fan of Trump - Ted Cruz was my guy - but I had reconciled myself to lukewarm support based on the policies he was advocating, especially his determination to fill Supreme Court vacancies with Justices who respects the Constitution. The political conversation was not angry or loud, but I was asked how I could possibly support a "jag-off" like Trump (we are Pittsburghers). It became clear that the other faction was focused on Trump's obnoxious personality while I was focused on his policies. HRC was seen, but not openly acknowledged, as nothing more than an empty suit with a 'D' on the back.
Ironically, the only rational discussions of the subject were between me and my most-obnoxious brother-in-law. We made our cases and agreed that the divide was pretty much insurmountable.
In the intervening years, both sides have more or less danced around the topic of politics...but something new has cropped up. My great niece (my sister's grand-daughter) has decided that she wants to be - and she actually claims to be, and acts in every possible respect, like a boy. She is now 16, with a faux moustache, boy's clothing, grooming, and mannerisms. I do not know whether she has taken puberty blockers or had "top surgery," but the normal indicia of female-ness are absent. (ironically, her 12-year-old brother has hair down to his waist and looks like a girl but makes no claims in that regard). In the first years of this delusion, my sister would often make the mistake of referring to her as "she," then quickly correcting herself and apologizing. Now she is fully with the program and it is He, Him, and His, as she seems appropriate.
Unknown to me, that branch of the family has been holding its figurative breath at family events where she (the neice) and I have been in attendance, for fear that I would say something untoward. But I'm no troglodyte, and have treated her as she wanted to be treated, boy-name and all. Indeed, my wife and I took her on an afternoon excursion last year to see a nearby attraction that none of us had seen, and it was a completely pleasant experience for all (( think).
Still, when speaking to my sister I have not held back: I think that their patronizing her delusion is the wrong path, pointing out that this path leads invariably to a lonely and pathetic adult life, with no intimate relationships of any significance. With whom would she couple? And how?
Well.
A couple days after the election, my sister unloads with a, "I hope you Fascists are happy now!" e-mail, telling me that she knows that my niece's life and happiness are now hanging by a thread, blah, blah, blah. I responded - perhaps a little more harshly than I should have - laying out the reasons why I am indeed happy with the results of the election, and I'm looking forward to four years of positive developments in our beloved country. I reiterated my concern and belief that the continuing patronization of my niece's claimed gender will hurt her in the long run.
My sister's response, in short, was, You are an asshole. [I have intentionally left out the religio-political elements of this dispute. My sister is a fervent, observant Catholic, and the whole family remains practicing Catholics, at least at our generation. I challenge her support for baby-killers, and she challenges my support for a...well, you know all the common Leftist slanders].
So we won't be exchanging Thanksgiving (or Christmas, or New Year's, or Kwanzaaaa) greetings this year, or for the foreseeable future. Can't say that it bothers me in the least. There are certain words that cannot be walked back.
Looking at it from 10,000 feet it is absurd that a 75-year-old man (me) is just now formalizing a longstanding rift with his 85-year-old sister (her), but I have no regrets. To use the now-trite expression, it is what it is.
A family reunion in Holland, Michigan brought "everyone" together in one spot, and the primaries were finally over, with HRC and Trump the actual nominees. I was never a fan of Trump - Ted Cruz was my guy - but I had reconciled myself to lukewarm support based on the policies he was advocating, especially his determination to fill Supreme Court vacancies with Justices who respects the Constitution. The political conversation was not angry or loud, but I was asked how I could possibly support a "jag-off" like Trump (we are Pittsburghers). It became clear that the other faction was focused on Trump's obnoxious personality while I was focused on his policies. HRC was seen, but not openly acknowledged, as nothing more than an empty suit with a 'D' on the back.
Ironically, the only rational discussions of the subject were between me and my most-obnoxious brother-in-law. We made our cases and agreed that the divide was pretty much insurmountable.
In the intervening years, both sides have more or less danced around the topic of politics...but something new has cropped up. My great niece (my sister's grand-daughter) has decided that she wants to be - and she actually claims to be, and acts in every possible respect, like a boy. She is now 16, with a faux moustache, boy's clothing, grooming, and mannerisms. I do not know whether she has taken puberty blockers or had "top surgery," but the normal indicia of female-ness are absent. (ironically, her 12-year-old brother has hair down to his waist and looks like a girl but makes no claims in that regard). In the first years of this delusion, my sister would often make the mistake of referring to her as "she," then quickly correcting herself and apologizing. Now she is fully with the program and it is He, Him, and His, as she seems appropriate.
Unknown to me, that branch of the family has been holding its figurative breath at family events where she (the neice) and I have been in attendance, for fear that I would say something untoward. But I'm no troglodyte, and have treated her as she wanted to be treated, boy-name and all. Indeed, my wife and I took her on an afternoon excursion last year to see a nearby attraction that none of us had seen, and it was a completely pleasant experience for all (( think).
Still, when speaking to my sister I have not held back: I think that their patronizing her delusion is the wrong path, pointing out that this path leads invariably to a lonely and pathetic adult life, with no intimate relationships of any significance. With whom would she couple? And how?
Well.
A couple days after the election, my sister unloads with a, "I hope you Fascists are happy now!" e-mail, telling me that she knows that my niece's life and happiness are now hanging by a thread, blah, blah, blah. I responded - perhaps a little more harshly than I should have - laying out the reasons why I am indeed happy with the results of the election, and I'm looking forward to four years of positive developments in our beloved country. I reiterated my concern and belief that the continuing patronization of my niece's claimed gender will hurt her in the long run.
My sister's response, in short, was, You are an asshole. [I have intentionally left out the religio-political elements of this dispute. My sister is a fervent, observant Catholic, and the whole family remains practicing Catholics, at least at our generation. I challenge her support for baby-killers, and she challenges my support for a...well, you know all the common Leftist slanders].
So we won't be exchanging Thanksgiving (or Christmas, or New Year's, or Kwanzaaaa) greetings this year, or for the foreseeable future. Can't say that it bothers me in the least. There are certain words that cannot be walked back.
Looking at it from 10,000 feet it is absurd that a 75-year-old man (me) is just now formalizing a longstanding rift with his 85-year-old sister (her), but I have no regrets. To use the now-trite expression, it is what it is.
