Following sums up the needs for more and better quality education about sex beginning in grade school as most colleges don't teach it unless it's a major or minor course requirement. From Dr. Betty Dodson PhD.
"After hearing countless sex histories from girls and women over the past four decades, I believe sexual repression begins the moment a parent or caregiver punishes a child’s natural curiosity for touching their own sex organs.
Society needs to understand that the health of each person’s sexlife rests upon childhood masturbation— the foundation upon which all of human sexuality is based. It’s very consistent that each client I see struggling with orgasms as an adult has no memory of masturbating in childhood or in their teens. The absence of this natural self-exploration interferes with the development of nerve pathways that carry positive sensations from our genitals to the pleasure center in the brain. This blocks or slows down the development of sexual release with orgasm.
Not as many boys get the same message of “Don’t touch your-self down there” as do girls. The male sex organ is more easily accessible so society tacitly agrees that a boy’s sexual interest is more natural or urgent due to the ejaculation of semen. However, all societies controlled by some form of organized religion demonize pleasure for its own sake, so boys suffer masturbation repression as well. The predominant acceptance for sexuality remains fixated on procreation within a monogamous heterosexual marriage— far too narrow an image. Therefore most of us are sinners in the eyes of the church which makes it much easier to control a large portion of the population by a few.
Female sexual conditioning is already in play when a concerned parent unknowingly sets up a sexual double standard when mothers want their sons to be sexual but fear their daughters might end up with an unwanted teen pregnancy with all that entails. Therefore, most girls grow up without any idea of where her sexual feelings come from except by accident like climbing a rope in gym class, clenching their legs together or rocking on the arm of an overstuffed chair. They become fixated on some weird form of indirect clitoral stimulation that rarely translates into partnersex. Meanwhile, boys learn to come quickly to avoid getting “caught in the act.” This leads to adult men ejaculating fast because they have not learned to sustain heightened sexual feelings. So for every pre-orgasmic woman there is a pre-mature ejaculating man.
Add to this all the jokes, disgust or moral condemnation shown toward masturbation and we have a recipe for preventing people from discovering the joys of orgasmic sex. Those who do masturbate often struggle with guilt and self-loathing. Once we include Dr. Freud’s theory of “mature vaginal orgasms” for women and more recently the much debated, yet fashionable G spot, we have a population that is very sexually confused. Men believe they must “give” a woman her orgasm to prove they’re good lovers while women have been conditioned to protect the male ego. Many women end up faking an orgasm to avoid hurting a lovers feelings and thus sacrificing their own pleasure. As if that isn’t bad enough, we misname the female genitals by reducing all the parts down to a “vagina” which only refers to the birth canal. When was the last time you saw the word clitoris in print or heard it said on television?
Sex educators know this: When we go on television, we are told we can say “G” spot but refer to the clitoris as the “C” spot. When I was interviewed by Bill O’Reilly in 2002, I was told that I couldn’t say “Orgasms for Two” the title of my book, so I had to use the sub title, “The Joy of Partnersex.” Bill said it was because his was a “family show.” I took that to mean families didn’t have any orgasms which is probably closer to the truth.
As long as church and state continues to limit sex to procreation, we’ll have a severely repressed society. Nearly all men can ejaculate quickly but far too many women are not orgasmic. These women suffer from guilt and self-loathing and blame themselves for being “frigid” or today it’s called “sexually dysfunctional.” Both women and men end up comparing themselves to porn stars, which has been society’s primary form of sex education. Naturally this causes more insecurity and dissention in relationships often leading to divorce and the break-up of families. But a sexually controlled society is much easier to manipulate by a few authoritarian dictators, priests, or other so-called leaders.
We now have a chance to change the course of history with the emerging Global Revolution. This time we must complete the sexual revolution that began in the sixties by including orgasmic pleasure in the teaching of human sexuality.
“Help me Dr. Betty. I’ve never had an orgasm.” I have lost track of how many times I‘ve answered this very same question: I want to share this near perfect example from Rebecca. Her story represents many young girls’ struggle with the inability to discover and enjoy the experience of orgasm. In a society where sex is everywhere we turn, this can be emotionally very painful. She feels broken and sexually inadequate."
Love to link her site but it absolutely positively violates the no-nudity rules here.
Should be hit 1 though googling her name.
