I don't know about you but I get great joy, happiness and satisfaction from doing the right thing, the right way for the right reason. If doing the right thing is making you miserable, I don't see how you could possibly be passing the test. Given that you said you would have preferred to have never been born rather than to live the life you have led, do you think you are passing the test?
Who is administering this test?
Joy, happiness and satisfaction aren't the means I use to measure life. In fact I find that the closet I get to them, the more often I'm in the Wrong on things.
Misery us the intent of the test. As I said, we're not talking about a loving, fun or happy version of the Divine.
I said I'd rather be dead than be part of an organized religion, especially Christianity.
I started living properly far too late in life to pass the test. The best I can hope is that my Soul is deemed worthy of another chance to get it Right rather than being condemned.