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Opinion | Mona Eltahawy: I swear to make men uncomfortable. And I'm proud of it.
The more a woman is caught in the intersections of oppressions, the more her language is policed.
May.06.2018 / 5:06 PM ET
Editor's note: This piece has been edited in accordance with NBC News editorial policy. The editors appreciate the irony.
Filthy. Disgraceful. Indecent. Vulgar. That is what the powerful and their enablers will call you if you dare poke them in the eye by actually doing what you were invited to do — roast the rich and powerful at the White House Correspondent’s Dinner — rather than what women are expected to do from birth: play nice.
On April 28, comedian Michelle Wolf let loose a bipartisan evisceration on beltway politicians and media (tellingly, the notoriously thin-skinned President Donald Trump did not attend). After peppering her speech with several swear words as well as references to sex acts and genitalia, Wolf was criticized by an uneasy alliance of both supposedly free-speech obsessed conservatives and supposedly free-speech obsessed journalists. The hypocrisy was hard to miss.
“I think sometimes they look at a woman and they think ‘Oh, she'll be nice,’ and if you've seen any of my comedy you know that I don't — I'm not,” Wolf told NPR after the event. “I think they still have preconceived notions of how women will present themselves and I don't fit in that box.”
At a time when the word “resistance” has been sanitized and neutered, a “vulgar” Wolf understood the power of words and used them to deliver a knockout punch to a crowd more accustomed to being comfortable.
It is instructive that in the era of Trump — a man who has torpedoed the notion of civility — women are still expected to be polite and demure. “She did not cater to the room” was an actual criticism of her performance.
At a time when the word “resistance” has been sanitized and neutered, a “vulgar” Wolf understood the power of words and used them to deliver a knockout punch to a crowd more accustomed to being comfortable. As one commentator put it: “She wanted to napalm the room and she did. Unapologetically.”
That is the power of profanity — and why it is important for women to not shy away from it. Indeed, whenever I stand at a podium to give a lecture, I begin with my declaration of faith: “F**k the patriarchy.” Whether I am lecturing on feminism in Lahore, Pakistan or Dublin, Ireland or Johannesburg, South Africa or New York City, my declaration never changes.
I could say “dismantle the patriarchy” but I don’t because I am a woman; a woman of color; a Muslim woman. And I am not supposed to say f**k.
May.06.2018 / 5:06 PM ET
Editor's note: This piece has been edited in accordance with NBC News editorial policy. The editors appreciate the irony.
Filthy. Disgraceful. Indecent. Vulgar. That is what the powerful and their enablers will call you if you dare poke them in the eye by actually doing what you were invited to do — roast the rich and powerful at the White House Correspondent’s Dinner — rather than what women are expected to do from birth: play nice.
On April 28, comedian Michelle Wolf let loose a bipartisan evisceration on beltway politicians and media (tellingly, the notoriously thin-skinned President Donald Trump did not attend). After peppering her speech with several swear words as well as references to sex acts and genitalia, Wolf was criticized by an uneasy alliance of both supposedly free-speech obsessed conservatives and supposedly free-speech obsessed journalists. The hypocrisy was hard to miss.
“I think sometimes they look at a woman and they think ‘Oh, she'll be nice,’ and if you've seen any of my comedy you know that I don't — I'm not,” Wolf told NPR after the event. “I think they still have preconceived notions of how women will present themselves and I don't fit in that box.”
At a time when the word “resistance” has been sanitized and neutered, a “vulgar” Wolf understood the power of words and used them to deliver a knockout punch to a crowd more accustomed to being comfortable.
It is instructive that in the era of Trump — a man who has torpedoed the notion of civility — women are still expected to be polite and demure. “She did not cater to the room” was an actual criticism of her performance.
At a time when the word “resistance” has been sanitized and neutered, a “vulgar” Wolf understood the power of words and used them to deliver a knockout punch to a crowd more accustomed to being comfortable. As one commentator put it: “She wanted to napalm the room and she did. Unapologetically.”
That is the power of profanity — and why it is important for women to not shy away from it. Indeed, whenever I stand at a podium to give a lecture, I begin with my declaration of faith: “F**k the patriarchy.” Whether I am lecturing on feminism in Lahore, Pakistan or Dublin, Ireland or Johannesburg, South Africa or New York City, my declaration never changes.
I could say “dismantle the patriarchy” but I don’t because I am a woman; a woman of color; a Muslim woman. And I am not supposed to say f**k.
