I kind of do have an idea. You made up your mind at an early age. You have been putting up your knowledge against mine. They have all been arguments why God doesn't exist. You never looked for reasons why God exists. You only looked for reasons why God doesn't exist.No, the reality is that you have no clue how much effort I have put into the topic. Just because I came to different conclusions than you doesn't mean I have not studied the topic and I'd put my knowledge against what I've seen of yours any day.