Great OP. Different attitudes, times, dance styles. Practically no politics!
I’m sitting here on my balcony in my huge medical fracture boot. Was listening to old “American Songbook” crooners. The discussion made me laugh, and most of the videos too.
I remember as a square kid agreeing with my mom’s best friend that Elvis’ moves were “disgusting.” I grew out of that eventually … but always thought rock and roll individual “dancing” was kinda dumb. My mom taught me a little cha cha, and in 5th & 6th grade some girls invited us boys to their house to learn Lindy to “American Bandstand.” We were terrible, but tried. Rock and Roll killed old-fashioned partner dancing.
It wasn’t til partner dancing returned with the liberating (and multi-cultural) disco-hustle that my interest was piqued, because I went to some of the authentic NY clubs where it developed — not the posh clubs where it died.
But it wasn’t until I was over 40 that a woman dragged my ass out of the bar scene and invited me to a free traditional dance lesson that I got hooked. I really was reborn as a social dancer. Soon I was going after work every night for lessons and on weekends to every kind of dance party. In those days NYC had some really economical dance schools with great social dancers. Later I taught dance and formed a social dance club — when I lived in Beijing where Chinese and Westerners mixed together to enjoy American-style dancing.
But it does take time and effort to learn social dance, especially for a guy who needs to “lead,” and it is pretty much a dying social art, with video game dancing and modern individualism having replaced the old great Big Band era — except with a few ethnic exceptions, and occasional upsurges like Argentine Tango in a few big cities.
In the final analysis it doesn’t much matter if it’s social dancing, folk dancing, free-style, or whatever. They all provide different but similar pleasures. When you dance — if you have the energy and the music moves you — it’s great. Even if you are not a “born dancer.” Even if you look kinda silly.