Aer Lingus: A Capital Dragon


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Sep 22, 2013
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This is a capitalism diorama about anti-terrorism directions, inspired by the film Air Force One! Thanks for reading (happy and safe summer to all),



Aer Lingus (Ireland's national airline company) had become a modern symbol of capitalism flowery and kids liked collecting model-toys of Aer Lingus airplanes for their toy collection. In fact, this airline company, not unlike Indian Airlines and Korean Air, had become a trophy of new age commercial aesthetics.


However, back in the UK, inter-religious troubles between the Irish Catholic minority and the British Protestant majority living alongside each other under disappointing socioeconomic policy by Parliament in Belfast (Northern Ireland) had created a serious schism in the global Christian community stretching into the 21st Century. This threatened basic appreciation of unifying commercial activities such as brand marketing of companies like Aer Lingus (AL) and British Petroleum (BP). In fact, home artisans in Belfast were busy making IRA dolls for Catholics for Christmastime gift-shopping. In other words, sociocultural flaws were threatening ideals of capitalism.


This didn't deter the Aer Lingus executives from continuing in their handsome presentation of brand marketing and colorful Irish designs and insignia for their airplanes, airport staff, and pilots/attendants. Even the special AL pin worn by numerous pilots of the Irish company exhibited a special patriotic flair for Irish culture. Capitalism was enduring though troubled.


Of course, Ireland (Dublin) was a far ways away from Northern Ireland (Dublin). Generations of British Protestant colonialists and their descendants had settled into the northern tip of mainland Ireland for centuries during the British Empire's systematic colonization of Ireland. This was resisted by centuries of Irish Catholic rebellions, culminating in the Easter Rising of 1916 and then the independence of Ireland (Dublin) from the British Empire in the early 20th Century. However, Belfast (Northern Ireland) remained a part of the British dominion. Today, the Irish Catholic minorities living alongside the British Protestant majority in Northern Ireland simply didn't feel as connected to the flowery world of modern commerce and Aer Lingus flowery. In fact, Belfast was more associated with the IRA and terrorism and police brutality news-stories than with Aer Lingus designs.


Irish Catholics didn't want to feel left out of the loop of new age capitalism and disattached from Aer Lingus marketing psychology and culture in the 21st Century. The Irish Catholic minority in Belfast endorsed their leaders and Sinn Fein spokesmen and Parliament officials who cared about their involvement in regular world commerce running through Belfast and through Northern Ireland media. The Irish Catholics of Belfast didn't want the Aer Lingus planes to take off without them! Now, it was up to the excellence of the actual Aer Lingus airline company to spread the good word of globally unifying commercial excellence.


Aer Lingus however faced a serious new kind of competition from the emerged world of enhanced airline comforts and entertainment services. Bolivia and Vietnam now offered incredible in-flight entertainment involving gorgeous stewardesses presented in lingerie shows. This threatened the much more modest form of Aer Lingus in-flight services presentations and therefore the company's ability to compete daringly on the new world stage!


Aer Lingus hired staff were shown images of the incredible in-flight amenities and entertainment by the adorned stewardesses from Bolivia and Vietnam in the 21st Century. These Aer Lingus staff were encouraged to think of creative ways to help the Irish airline company compete in this new environment and offer travelers their own special brand of travel comforts. How would these Aer Lingus staff help their company compete with this new kind of designed aesthetic in commercial travel?


The 'Luck of the Irish' is both a bard's tune as well as an old sad song. The Irish are reputed to love their ale and sing songs of remorse and loss, perhaps from the centuries of experience of living under colonialism on their own land. Aer Lingus prepared its new fleet of commercial passenger airplanes to compete in this environment of daringly mounted capitalism bravado. They wanted to avoid the pitfalls of terrorism security failures and in-flight service mediocrity and training deformities.


Therefore, the Aer Lingus executives decided to start hiring much more attractive Irish stewardesses for their in-flight experience for passengers. These stewardesses may not be required to do anything special or extra for their passengers and patrons, but they'd certainly be conspicuous as peculiarly attractive. This would help the company present a more adorned face in the airline industry and therefore compete in this new environment of daring capitalism. The first such stewardess hiree was Shelbye Collins, a redheaded stunner who was a big fan of the Leprechaun horror-film series.


The next stewardess hiree was a Dublin beauty named Theresa Clark, descendant of a prominent Irish patriot-participant of the 1916 Easter Rising. Theresa was a big fan of James Joyce and would add a splash of intellectual flair to this new staff of beautiful Aer Lingus flight attendants.


The third new hiree was a copperhead-angel named Maureen Collins, a resident of Belfast (Northern Ireland) whose brother Sean was suspected of having some underground ties to the P-IRA (Provisional Irish Republican Army) as well as to the ex-CIA IRA 'sentinel' known as Green Shadow. Maureen would offer Aer Lingus a special flavor of in-flight diarism for world passengers!


Amidst all this newfound marketing energy in the Aer Lingus airline company in Ireland, there lingered the devastating paranoia of anti-capitalism terrorism. Would the PLO and IRA target British Petroleum (BP) with terrorist activity, inducing retaliatory violence from British police and military? Would such shock create unnatural tremors disturbing the natural flow of commercial activity necessary for peaceful and normal/sane Aer Lingus business? Would passengers soon become too terrified to fly on Aer Lingus, because of the shadowy threat of foreign terrorism?


GREEN SHADOW: Regardless of what happens with British Petroleum, the last thing brigadiers or Palestinians seek is a disturbance in regular Aer Lingus or Emirates commercial activity. Capitalism has become a new 'arm' of modern geopolitical diligence.


"Money is everything" (Ecclesiastes)

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