Sorry about your Dad. I lost my cousin, my bio dad, and my sister all in one year a few months apart from each other. It's been 10 years since my sister's suicide. Those kinds of experiences have taken quite a toll on my own personal life. So sorry for your pain.I grew up very religious. My father’s death was the last straw thst pushed me away from all organized religion. I continue to be a very Spiritual person following the path I found for myself after my dad passed away.