Uncovered Women

[Truthmatters]

I know, we all know women are there to flaunt their bodies for strangers like you to ogle.

Nice.

BTW, I'm female, you loon.

In 90 degree weather It is not about sexy to wear a tank top and shorts.

Women and Men should have the right to wear what they damned please.

If a man looks at me and gets a boner that is his problem not mine.

Bend over in front of the wrong Man and it will be.

I would summarily take care of his little problem and he would end up with a much bigger problem.

Being a chick doesnt mean being defenseless

 

[Wingsofwind]

I know, we all know women are there to flaunt their bodies for strangers like you to ogle.

Nice.

BTW, I'm female, you loon.

In 90 degree weather It is not about sexy to wear a tank top and shorts.

Women and Men should have the right to wear what they damned please.

If a man looks at me and gets a boner that is his problem not mine.

Bend over in front of the wrong Man and it will be.

Speaking from experience? Admit it, you got off at the thought of it. lol

 

[Momanohedhunter]

In 90 degree weather It is not about sexy to wear a tank top and shorts.

Women and Men should have the right to wear what they damned please.

If a man looks at me and gets a boner that is his problem not mine.

Bend over in front of the wrong Man and it will be.

Speaking from experience? Admit it, you got off at the thought of it. lol

I will admit this, When the Wife is doing what ever she is doing in short shorts, and most of a shirt, and she bends over in front of me showing off that perfect Pacific Islander butt, she will be ravaged. I think thats why she does it.

 

[catzmeow]

I'm an exceptionally negative/pesimistic person who has never found anything positive in change. Better to be broken for standing for what you believe in than to bend because you have no spine at all. I have never been adaptable nor do I likely ever see myself becoming adaptable.

You posit a false dichotomy. I'm a great believer (probably because I grew up Southern Baptist before they got so whackadoo fundy) in being uncompromising on the essentials, and flexible on the non-essentials. That's a fundamental Baptist tenet: Unity in the essentials, tolerance in the non-essentials. Sadly, the Southern Baptists have moved away from that philosophy in recent years.

My kids, for example, can live in a modern world, with the opportunities that entails, while maintaining respect for adults, good scholastic achievement, and being good and dutiful citizens.

Progress brings many things, both good and bad. By rejecting it all so dismissively, you miss out on the positives.

Life is not about joy, fun, or pleasure. It never has been and never will be. It's about living a good, decent and proper life. Nothing more and nothing less. To ignore what is Right in favor of what is Easy or Fun is exactly the sort of thing that is destroying this nation.

My, what a grim existence you've carved out for yourself. One can be both right, and full of joy. I find pleasure in so many things, from having a houseful of teenagers to cooking a good meal for my significant other, to seeing new places and things, to being competent at my job, and growing flowers in my garden. It makes me feel pity that you've chosen not to experience life in this way.

Shared joy is what makes duty worthwhile.

When one signs onto a ship, they put their name on a contract. Among the articles of that contract is the stipulation that the sailor will abide by the directions of the Captain and Officers of the Ship. Failure to do so, or attempting to usurp that power is a criminal act and a breach of contract; both of which can be harshly punished.

Still bullshit, and if you "harshly punish" your significant other, I hope you do time in jail. Failing to bow down to your wishes isn't a crime. If force is the only means whereby you are able to accomplish your relationship goals, you clearly aren't suited for a relationship, because you will kill it.

Please show me anywhere in this discussion where I've used the word "Love". I am not a believer in Romantic Love. I literally don't believe it exists. I can say for certain that I have never experienced it in my almost 37 years of life (as of this coming Sunday) and nobody has ever felt it towards me. IF this concept actually existed, wouldn't you think I'd have had some inkling of it in more than three decades of life?

I'm not going to lie, I get all melty in my heart when I think about my guy. He is the epitomy of what I think that a think a man should be: brave, hardworking, responsible, ethical, dutiful, strong, self-discplined, kind, considerate, and giving. (I hold women and children to similar standards...this is who I want my kids to be, as well).

But, love to me isn't merely a feeling, it is an action. Love is two people merging their lives into a single life, and sacrificing for each other's wellbeing. It's reciprocal, it's committed, and it takes work to sustain such relationships.

I see relationships as much more of a business deal or contract with the benefits of friendship than anything else. The one time I've ever come close to being interested in asking a woman to marry me, I ended up wasting about $500 on having a lawyer start to draw up the pre-nup before the young lady decided that an education on the other side of the country was more interesting than me.

It's not just about you. What do you bring to the table that a woman would want, given your grim view of things?

It shouldn't require the pressure of the foot on the neck, so far as I'm concerned. I'm not looking for the sort of woman who would have to be forced into this sort of arrangement. I'm seeking the type of woman who is willing to knowingly and willingly accept this type of arrangement because it's what she believes is correct as well.

And yet, based upon your above statements, you'd have no problem physically harming her if she broached the contract. Not cool.

One of the main differences between me and most other guys in my generation? I have no interest in chasing pussy. Sex is a nice dessert to a relationship in my mind. It's nowhere near the main course of the meal. To that end, most modern women hold no interest for me at all because sex is the only thing they have to offer a Traditional Man. I will be more than willing to go to my grave a bachelor rather than violating my principles for the sake of a relationship.

I actually agree with you. Sex, while I enjoy it, is the easy part. Finding someone that you respect, someone who lives to the same ethical code, who looks at life in a similar way, who is reciprocal in their dealings with you? These things are far more important in the long run.

 

[Anachronism]

You posit a false dichotomy. I'm a great believer (probably because I grew up Southern Baptist before they got so whackadoo fundy) in being uncompromising on the essentials, and flexible on the non-essentials. That's a fundamental Baptist tenet: Unity in the essentials, tolerance in the non-essentials. Sadly, the Southern Baptists have moved away from that philosophy in recent years.

I am not a big believer in the existance of "non-essentials" and never have been.

Progress brings many things, both good and bad. By rejecting it all so dismissively, you miss out on the positives.

I find very little "positive" about the modern day and age. My screenname should make that very clear.

My, what a grim existence you've carved out for yourself. One can be both right, and full of joy. I find pleasure in so many things, from having a houseful of teenagers to cooking a good meal for my significant other, to seeing new places and things, to being competent at my job, and growing flowers in my garden. It makes me feel pity that you've chosen not to experience life in this way.

Shared joy is what makes duty worthwhile.

Please save the pity for someone who wants it or who will use it. One CAN be both right and happy. It doesn't happen often, but it is possible. Life is what it is. I am a Fateist. This is the thread of life that was woven for my by the Norns at the moment of my birth. No man nor God can change it. I simply have to do my best with what I have and hope it's good enough to get another shot to come back and try again.

Still bullshit, and if you "harshly punish" your significant other, I hope you do time in jail. Failing to bow down to your wishes isn't a crime. If force is the only means whereby you are able to accomplish your relationship goals, you clearly aren't suited for a relationship, because you will kill it.

I am most definitely NOT suited for any form of modern relationship. I never have been. In almost 37 years I've had ONE relationship last more than 9 months. I am way to blunt, honest, and upfront about who and what I am for any truly long-term relationship to likely survive. I understand that. It's also why any marriage I did enter into would include a pre-nuptial agreement.

But, love to me isn't merely a feeling, it is an action. Love is two people merging their lives into a single life, and sacrificing for each other's wellbeing. It's reciprocal, it's committed, and it takes work to sustain such relationships.

I see Romance as a separated concept from Love. The physical versus the emotional sides of that coin. I've been told that I'm a wonderful Date and I can be horribly Romantic at times; but I'm a terrible boyfriend and definitely not husband material. I do agree that, if Love does exist it should be reciprocal and committed and that it takes work. My problem is that having never actually encounted such an emotion, I have a very difficult time believing that it actually exists.

It's not just about you. What do you bring to the table that a woman would want, given your grim view of things?

The ability to protect and defend her, to provide for her needs, and to be Romantic on occasion. As I said, I believe in a very Traditional view of life, relationships, and the world in general. I don't do the metrosexual thing. Never have.

And yet, based upon your above statements, you'd have no problem physically harming her if she broached the contract. Not cool.

Discipline is necessary in any business environment to maintain a smoothly operating organization. It's just that simple.

I actually agree with you. Sex, while I enjoy it, is the easy part. Finding someone that you respect, someone who lives to the same ethical code, who looks at life in a similar way, who is reciprocal in their dealings with you? These things are far more important in the long run.

On that we will agree. Though it's less about Easy/Hard and more about Important/Unimportant when it comes to Sex in my mind.

 

[catzmeow]

I am not a big believer in the existance of "non-essentials" and never have been.

Everything is an essential, and must conform to your rules?

I find very little "positive" about the modern day and age. My screenname should make that very clear.

You seem to appreciate technology.

Please save the pity for someone who wants it or who will use it. One CAN be both right and happy. It doesn't happen often, but it is possible. Life is what it is. I am a Fateist. This is the thread of life that was woven for my by the Norns at the moment of my birth. No man nor God can change it. I simply have to do my best with what I have and hope it's good enough to get another shot to come back and try again.

It's a choice. How very Pollyannaish of me, but I choose to be glad. Shit happens to all of us, and the cards aren't dealt fairly. We all suffer. We can allow our suffering to make us brittle and cold, or we can allow it to make us more human. But, it is a choice.

I am most definitely NOT suited for any form of modern relationship. I never have been. In almost 37 years I've had ONE relationship last more than 9 months. I am way to blunt, honest, and upfront about who and what I am for any truly long-term relationship to likely survive. I understand that. It's also why any marriage I did enter into would include a pre-nuptial agreement.

It isn't possible that you could be adaptable?

I see Romance as a separated concept from Love. The physical versus the emotional sides of that coin. I've been told that I'm a wonderful Date and I can be horribly Romantic at times; but I'm a terrible boyfriend and definitely not husband material. I do agree that, if Love does exist it should be reciprocal and committed and that it takes work. My problem is that having never actually encounted such an emotion, I have a very difficult time believing that it actually exists.

This makes me wonder if you are either an ISTJ or an INTJ (Meyer's Briggs Personality Test). They aren't super emotional (my boyfriend is somewhere between an ISTJ and INTJ) by nature.

I think, though, that your defenses are so high that you've made it impossible for someone to get over the wall. Love requires vulnerability. If you make yourself invulnerable, you automatically rule out love.

The ability to protect and defend her, to provide for her needs, and to be Romantic on occasion. As I said, I believe in a very Traditional view of life, relationships, and the world in general. I don't do the metrosexual thing. Never have.

I don't either. Yuck.

Couldn't you do these things without being a total control freak? (see comments below).

Discipline is necessary in any business environment to maintain a smoothly operating organization. It's just that simple.

The greater the level of control exercised by an entity, the more extreme the efforts of human beings will be to circumvent it. Control is an illusion.

On that we will agree. Though it's less about Easy/Hard and more about Important/Unimportant when it comes to Sex in my mind.

Sex is important. It's just not as important as character, integrity, and intelligence.

 

[Anachronism]

Everything is an essential, and must conform to your rules?

For the most part, yes. As I said, I'm a pesimist. Once things don't go my way, I'm not a very pleasant person to be around. I'm no longer allowed to watch sporting events in my apartment because my roommates have no patience for my yelling and screaming at the television set when my team loses.

You seem to appreciate technology.

Only because it's available. If it weren't, I would be fine with that as well. Though actually I tend to go out of my way to avoid a lot of modern technologies when I can.

It's a choice. How very Pollyannaish of me, but I choose to be glad. Shit happens to all of us, and the cards aren't dealt fairly. We all suffer. We can allow our suffering to make us brittle and cold, or we can allow it to make us more human. But, it is a choice.

I mentioned the birthmark in our private conversation yesterday. Trust me, any Pollyannaish-ness was cut out of me VERY EARLY ON in life. I've seen the darkness inside people's hearts. I've been the mercy date. I've been the mercy ****. Sorry, I know the world and my life both suck and that it's not going to change.

It isn't possible that you could be adaptable?

Not really. I've tried that in the past and all its gotten me is more frustration and the same (non-existant) results. I don't do change well to begin with and when there are not quick and easy results, the changes don't last long. I have neither the patience not the perseverence for that sort of thing.

This makes me wonder if you are either an ISTJ or an INTJ (Meyer's Briggs Personality Test). They aren't super emotional (my boyfriend is somewhere between an ISTJ and INTJ) by nature.

I can't remember what I came up as. I've done a couple of them over the years.

I think, though, that your defenses are so high that you've made it impossible for someone to get over the wall. Love requires vulnerability. If you make yourself invulnerable, you automatically rule out love.

Vulnerability is something I have no use for. It is going to take a very special person of a very odd breed to be able to tear down that wall. If that means I remain a bachelor for life, then so be it.

Couldn't you do these things without being a total control freak? (see comments below).

No, not really. Mostly because I choose the timing and the particulars/details of what goes on in my life. You have hit the nail on the head though. I am definitely a Control Freak and I always have been. I tend to drive women nuts on dates.... I refuse to sit with my back to the main entry to a restaurant/bar. I try not to sit with anyone to my right side. Things like that.

The greater the level of control exercised by an entity, the more extreme the efforts of human beings will be to circumvent it. Control is an illusion.

It may be an illusion or it may not. Either way it is what I seek in life. Then again I'm of the "If you can't win, why bother playing?" mentality.

Sex is important. It's just not as important as character, integrity, and intelligence.

I don't see it as being all that important. It's a nice side dish but I can take it or leave it most of the time. You're right that it's not as important as other things.

 

[High_Gravity]

Anarchonism are you a Celtics fan? I saw what you said about the yelling and screaming at the tv set, I am the same way when they play.

 

[catzmeow]

Anarchonism are you a Celtics fan? I saw what you said about the yelling and screaming at the tv set, I am the same way when they play.

I have this same problem when the Jazz, Utes, Jayhawks and Chiefs play. As you can imagine, I do a lot of screaming at those teams. :/

 

[High_Gravity]

Anarchonism are you a Celtics fan? I saw what you said about the yelling and screaming at the tv set, I am the same way when they play.

I have this same problem when the Jazz, Utes, Jayhawks and Chiefs play. As you can imagine, I do a lot of screaming at those teams. :/

I've put holes in my wall on behalf of the Celtics losses.

 

[Anachronism]

Anarchonism are you a Celtics fan? I saw what you said about the yelling and screaming at the tv set, I am the same way when they play.

No, I am not. I'm not a big basketball fan in general. However, I've gone through life as a fan of.....

The Boston Red Sox (86 years between World Series Championships. I was 12 years old when Bill *uckner let that ball roll between his legs)

The Washington Redskins (great in the 1980's but haven't won a damn thing in 20 years)

The Boston Bruins (hadn't won anything in my lifetime until last month).

 

[Anachronism]

I've put holes in my wall on behalf of the Celtics losses.

I've put holes in walls, doors, and television sets (with a boot) in the past.

 

[catzmeow]

I mentioned the birthmark in our private conversation yesterday. Trust me, any Pollyannaish-ness was cut out of me VERY EARLY ON in life. I've seen the darkness inside people's hearts. I've been the mercy date. I've been the mercy ****. Sorry, I know the world and my life both suck and that it's not going to change.

I understand. What keeps you going, then?

My ex-husband cheated on me repetively during our marriage and was verbally, emotionally, and spiritually abusive...for years. I was abused as a kid in the same way.

After the divorce, I thought I would be happier, because I wasn't carrying that around anymore, but I actually went through a severe depression. I feel like I climbed out of it, one minute at a time, one day at a time, and it was by finding joy in small/simple things...the way the light streams through the trees on my drive to work, this particularly beautiful dark blue morning glory vine that stretches for a quarter mile on my ride to work, listening to the radio with the windows down and the wind in my hair, listening to my children laugh. I kind of had to rebuild my life from scratch.

But trust me, I know what it feels like to believe that you are completely unloveable.

Not really. I've tried that in the past and all its gotten me is more frustration and the same (non-existant) results. I don't do change well to begin with and when there are not quick and easy results, the changes don't last long. I have neither the patience not the perseverence for that sort of thing.

The only thing that I will say about this is that I've experienced that change is hard without having some kind of support system to encourage you, because all change involves struggle and frustration. At the least, you might want to talk to a counselor or someone like that.

Vulnerability is something I have no use for. It is going to take a very special person of a very odd breed to be able to tear down that wall. If that means I remain a bachelor for life, then so be it.

Your fear of vulnerability is a completely understandable result of the pain you've experienced. It takes considerable intestinal fortitude to go through what you've gone through, and survive. However, those of us who are survivors are a little bit like Joshua Trees...the more severe the conditions, the more we twist in specific ways to absorb the pain and survive it. Those twists are what give us problems later on, down the road, even though, on some level, they are beautiful because they are our battle scars.

No, not really. Mostly because I choose the timing and the particulars/details of what goes on in my life. You have hit the nail on the head though. I am definitely a Control Freak and I always have been. I tend to drive women nuts on dates.... I refuse to sit with my back to the main entry to a restaurant/bar. I try not to sit with anyone to my right side. Things like that.

I've worked with violent offender programs for almost 20 years now. I don't sit with my back to a door/window---ever. It is what it is. In your case, however, I wonder if you might be a little OCD. We can talk more about this on PM if that would be better for you.

It may be an illusion or it may not. Either way it is what I seek in life. Then again I'm of the "If you can't win, why bother playing?" mentality.

It's okay to seek control, as long as you realize that the only thing you can really control is yourself. Attempting to control other people, events, circumstances, etc. is a painful exercise in futility.

 

[catzmeow]

I've put holes in my wall on behalf of the Celtics losses.

I'm not much of a hitter. I have, however, gone to bed in tears more often than I'd want to say (tears being my form of expressing anger, not sadness).

 

[Anachronism]

I understand. What keeps you going, then?

Myself. I've always been the sort of person who is more than willing to spend time by myself. I love being out with other people, but I'm just as happy being off by myself doing something on my own.

I'll be sending you a PM shortly.

 

[High_Gravity]

Anarchonism are you a Celtics fan? I saw what you said about the yelling and screaming at the tv set, I am the same way when they play.

No, I am not. I'm not a big basketball fan in general. However, I've gone through life as a fan of.....

The Boston Red Sox (86 years between World Series Championships. I was 12 years old when Bill *uckner let that ball roll between his legs)

The Washington Redskins (great in the 1980's but haven't won a damn thing in 20 years)

The Boston Bruins (hadn't won anything in my lifetime until last month).

Wish I was old enough to really watch sports in the 80s, the Celtics won 3 championships in that era.

 

[LumpyPostage]

Clothes are like food. Just as I don't give a rat's tuchas whether you want to eat haggis or a salad, I don't care whether you dress like a $5 crack whore or an Amish grandmother. It's all personal preference. That's why there's chocolate and vanilla.