So I met this guy...

[Amanda]

... the other night at the Wrinkle Room lol. He's a lot older than me... I don't know exactly, I thought 30 at first (which is old to me) but the more I think about some of the things I said maybe 35 or more. He really got to me... it's hard to explain, he's a good dancer and knows a lot about music (which I love love love) but I still feel weird about it. Anyway, he texted me today and wants to go out tomorrow.... would you go? Should I just ignore him?


And no, not the tow truck driver!

Nothing good can come of it imo ..........

Can you elaborate?

 

[Dis]

Look at it this way.. You think 30 is old? When you're 20, he'll be 37.

Actually, I'm 18... but I'm trying to work out if age really means that much. He said nothing that made me thing "oh, no." it's just the age thing. And he looks younger than 35. I thought 30 tops at first.

When the age gap is that much, it makes a difference; trust me. He's chasing after a child, by comparison. That, in itself is creepy as all hell.

 

[dilloduck]

As if you're going to take anyone's advice--------

 

[Zoom-boing]

I think he thinks the guy is lying about being divorced; that he's still married.

 

[Annie]

... the other night at the Wrinkle Room lol. He's a lot older than me... I don't know exactly, I thought 30 at first (which is old to me) but the more I think about some of the things I said maybe 35 or more. He really got to me... it's hard to explain, he's a good dancer and knows a lot about music (which I love love love) but I still feel weird about it. Anyway, he texted me today and wants to go out tomorrow.... would you go? Should I just ignore him?


And no, not the tow truck driver!

Simple question to ask yourself... What does someone who is just about old enough to be your father really want, and if he's that wonderful, why's he (supposedly) unattached at 35?

Yeah, I thought about that that night. He said he's recently divorced. Everything he said made sense, and he seems so great. I feel weird about going out with someone so much older, but... OTOH I don't think that age is necessarily the most important thing when finding "the one". He seems so perfect in all ways except the age thing. He didn't try anything with me... except while we were dancing, which sorta made sense. I don't know... I'm usually so good at reading guys, but he was like just so perfect in so many ways that it makes me nervous. Would you at least see him again, or no?

Amanda, don't tell anyone else, but at 35, with 3 kids under 10, in a very contentious divorce, I threw caution to the wind and had a fling with a 25 year old. Did I think for one second it would be a match? We had fun, but when he talked of marriage, I took a powder.

 

[Amanda]

... the other night at the Wrinkle Room lol. He's a lot older than me... I don't know exactly, I thought 30 at first (which is old to me) but the more I think about some of the things I said maybe 35 or more. He really got to me... it's hard to explain, he's a good dancer and knows a lot about music (which I love love love) but I still feel weird about it. Anyway, he texted me today and wants to go out tomorrow.... would you go? Should I just ignore him?


And no, not the tow truck driver!

fuck his brains out for awhile and dump him...or not...you know you want to...my girl is 15 years younger than me...its all good...

LOL... yeah, I was thinking that... but I don't want any drama. I hate breaking up with guys. I have a hard time just cutting guys loose.

 

[random3434]

Yeah, I thought about that that night. He said he's recently divorced. Everything he said made sense, and he seems so great. I feel weird about going out with someone so much older, but... OTOH I don't think that age is necessarily the most important thing when finding "the one". He seems so perfect in all ways except the age thing. He didn't try anything with me... except while we were dancing, which sorta made sense. I don't know... I'm usually so good at reading guys, but he was like just so perfect in so many ways that it makes me nervous. Would you at least see him again, or no?

i'm actually warren buffet. no, really.

I don't know what this means...

To put it bluntly, a guy in a bar will say anything to try and get in your pants.

 

[del]

Yeah, I thought about that that night. He said he's recently divorced. Everything he said made sense, and he seems so great. I feel weird about going out with someone so much older, but... OTOH I don't think that age is necessarily the most important thing when finding "the one". He seems so perfect in all ways except the age thing. He didn't try anything with me... except while we were dancing, which sorta made sense. I don't know... I'm usually so good at reading guys, but he was like just so perfect in so many ways that it makes me nervous. Would you at least see him again, or no?

i'm actually warren buffet. no, really.

I don't know what this means...

it means that the world is full of recently divorced guys who aren't.

 

[eots]

Dear young

Amanda..just promise to be some what gentle with him and still respect him in the morning

your Friend
eots

 

[Care4all]

obviously his exwife didn;t see perfect....

if she really is an ex.....

i'd beware....turn down the next date or two offers....talk more via phone or text...if he hits you a third time for a date....do lunch on a saturday or sunday...when he should be with the wifey and kids, just to be certain he ain't lying about the EX....

know ahead of time...no matter your street smarts amanda...HE will have more experience due to his age....which can be intriguing, and you could lose the upper hand....

so, in summary....take it slow, real slow...learn more about him and where he lives etc...a home phone land line number would be good....so you can be certain he isn't just a married one looking for some fun....

Older men are always interesting, because they seem to know so much more....and their attraction to you can be flattering in a way...(setting aside that you would be young, fresh "meat" so to say...to him)...so just be careful sweetie...so not to get hurt or feel used, somewhere down the road when all that seemed to be true about him, really isn't true at all.

Care

 

[Amanda]

go with you gut.......

Thats no good... my guts confused.

when i was 28 i dated an 18 year old.....we dated for 4 years or so......eventually we wanted different things in life and the age difference became an issue.....

go to lunch with him.....

He asked me to dinner and dancing... do you think that's too much?

 

[Burp]

Where is this "date" going to be? Dinner and talking? That's probably harmless. Another club? Alcohol, etc? Could lead to problems.

You like the guy. You aren't trying to decide if you are going to marry him. You could go out with the attitude that he could become a friend, nothing more.

Then give it time and see what happens down the road. Even though age is relative, you have to look at it logically. Say he is 37. He could have an 18 year old. If things work out, you ready for a step daughter just a few years younger than you?

You sound like you want to go - you are intrigued by him. So go. Keep it innocent. Keep it at arm's length.

Nothing wrong with two friends having dinner together.

I would keep it at that though. Nothing more.

That's kinda what I was thinking... but I don't know... things always seem to get complicated.

Does he know you are 18?

 

[Annie]

i'm actually warren buffet. no, really.

I don't know what this means...

To put it bluntly, a guy in a bar will say anything to try and get in your pants.

As will a woman in a bad place. LOL!

 

[Dis]

I think he thinks the guy is lying about being divorced; that he's still married.

I think this is all a load of hooey, posted for reaction myself. "Should I?" "Maybe I shouldn't." "But what if I did?"

The very serious answers have gone pretty much ignored; the "fuck his brains out" answers have received replies..

Tis a game, IMO.

If it's not, good luck, Amanda.. But, I've seen this scenario waaaaay too many times, and it's always the same.

 

[del]

i'm actually warren buffet. no, really.

I don't know what this means...

To put it bluntly, a guy in a bar will say anything to try and get in your pants.

what's your sign?

 

[Anguille]

Amanda, flip a coin.

 

[dilloduck]

I don't know what this means...

To put it bluntly, a guy in a bar will say anything to try and get in your pants.

what's your sign?

I knew you were too old for me to trust, Del. You two timing bastard !

 

[Luissa]

... the other night at the Wrinkle Room lol. He's a lot older than me... I don't know exactly, I thought 30 at first (which is old to me) but the more I think about some of the things I said maybe 35 or more. He really got to me... it's hard to explain, he's a good dancer and knows a lot about music (which I love love love) but I still feel weird about it. Anyway, he texted me today and wants to go out tomorrow.... would you go? Should I just ignore him?


And no, not the tow truck driver!

my brother when he was in his mid twenties went through a younger girl stage and he said it pretty much because you can control them and they are not as jaded. And like Dis said, there is probably a reason why he unattached at 35. I would be friends with him but nothing more, I have a feeling it won't turn out good otherwise.
YOu are young, date someone close to your age and without all the emotional baggage one gains with age.

 

[Amanda]

I think he thinks the guy is lying about being divorced; that he's still married.

I think this is all a load of hooey, posted for reaction myself. "Should I?" "Maybe I shouldn't." "But what if I did?"

The very serious answers have gone pretty much ignored; the "fuck his brains out" answers have received replies..

Tis a game, IMO.

If it's not, good luck, Amanda.. But, I've seen this scenario waaaaay too many times, and it's always the same.

I've tried to reply to everyone. I was really hoping I could get some insight from the others here. I'm sorry if you think I'm fucking with you, I'm not.

 

[Amanda]

So..what did your parents say when you asked them? Because if there's nothing wrong with it, then you did mention it to them, yes?

And what kinda night club has both 18 year olds, and 35 year olds in it? Ones old enough for "clubby" things like boozing it up, and the other's not.

It's a dance club. They don't check people at the door, only if you order drinks. I always get someone over 21 to buy for me.