‘Sesame Street’ Producers Deny Rumors That Bert, Ernie Are Russian Spies

Discussion in 'Current Events' started by longknife, Sep 19, 2018.

  1. longknife
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    longknife Diamond Member

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    Of course they are! Not only gather intelligence about PPS and the elitists supporting it but do everything they can to numb the minds of children watching them.

    U.S.—Show runners for Sesame Street have come forward to deny accusations that Bert and Ernie are in secret service to the Kremlin, feeding information to Russia’s leaders in order to undermine the interests of the United States.

    The statement came in response to a writer for the show, who stated that he’s “always thought of Bert and Ernie as KGB” while writing their scenes. Viewers pointed out that Ernie’s constant reminiscing over “the Motherland” and Bert’s propensity for reading Communist literature as he ignored Ernie’s incoherent ramblings suggested that the two may actually be Russian agents.

    Bert and Ernie are puppets, and are therefore apolitical characters without any ability to sell government secrets to Putin,” Sesame Street reps wrote on the show’s Twitter account. “We wrote the characters to talk about friendship, and they are in no way Russian spies.”

    Seriously, they’re puppets. Stop making such a big deal about whether or not they’re members of your proletariat uprising,” the tweet concluded.

    At publishing time, Oscar the Grouch had been accused of being enlisted by the CIA to wiretap Bert and Ernie’s phone.

    From 'Sesame Street' Producers Deny Rumors That Bert, Ernie Are Russian Spies
     
  2. Taz
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    Taz Gold Member

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    Gay Russian spies.
     
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  3. Johnlaw
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    Johnlaw Gold Member

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    Yes, they are obviously Russian spies because they have those bright red noses associated with drinking lots of vodka.
     
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  4. Crepitus
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    Crepitus Gold Member

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    Some days I'm very concerned about the average IQ here.
     
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  5. mdk
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    mdk Diamond Member

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    Bert has a unibrow and that alone is definitive proof he is not gay. Also, he is a puppet.
     
  6. Taz
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    Taz Gold Member

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    But what if the puppeteer uses Bert to whack off with?
     
  7. mdk
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    mdk Diamond Member

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    If you want to see puppets do crazy shit, you should watch Meet the Feebles. Yikes!
     
  8. airplanemechanic
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    airplanemechanic Gold Member

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    Well considering that his head is the shape of a butt plug....
     
  9. Rustic
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    Rustic Diamond Member

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    But they do Pack fudge... Apparently
     
  10. frigidweirdo
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    frigidweirdo Platinum Member

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    Gay Russian spies with a really bad story.
     
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