Bill Clinton - Down Wit Hiz Boyz - Slight NWS - Language

Discussion in 'Humor' started by GotZoom, Jul 18, 2005.

  1. GotZoom

    GotZoom Senior Member

    Apr 20, 2005
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    Cordova, TN
    Bill Clinton's apology - keeping his street cred up.

    Good evening. (What's up).

    This afternoon in this room, from this chair, I
    testified before the Office of Independent Counsel
    and the grand jury. (Today at my crib these suckers
    and playa-haters started grillin' me).

    I answered their questions truthfully, including
    questions about my private life, questions no
    American citizen would ever want to answer.
    (They started frontin'about my game and asking
    all kinds of foul shit).

    Still, I must take complete responsibility for
    all my actions, both public and private.
    And that is why I am speaking to you tonight.
    (I'm tired of these haters throwing salt in
    my game. I'm going to let y'all know my Mackin
    style tonight).

    As you know, in a deposition in January, I was
    asked questions about my relationship with
    Monica Lewinsky. While my answers were legally
    accurate, I did not volunteer information.
    (Awhile back, you nosy mother fuckers wanted
    to know if I was hittin'ho-ass Monica's skins.
    You did not have any video, so if you want to
    believe a 10 ho, then oh well).

    Indeed, I did have a relationship with Ms.
    Lewinsky that was not appropriate. In fact,
    it was wrong. It constituted a critical lapse
    in judgment and a personal failure on my part
    for which I am solely and completely
    responsible. (Yeah, I was hittin' that dime
    dropping Bitch! She was only sucking my jimmie
    though. I was stupid for messing with a young
    big-mouthed skank........, but don't hate me
    because I'm a playa).

    But I told the grand jury today and I say to
    you now that at no time did i ask anyone to
    lie, to hide or destroy evidence. (Outside
    of that shit I told punk-ass AG (Al Gore)
    to put on gay-ass Starr, Monica and her
    snitching friend, I was chill the whole time).

    I can only tell you I was motivated by many
    factors. First, by a desire to protect myself
    from the embarrassment of my own conduct.
    (Man look,I heard she was down with what ever.
    She wasn't all that but I plannedto pimp her
    around to my boyz in the Senate).

    The independent counsel investigation moved on
    to my staff and friends, then into my private
    life. And now the investigation itself is
    under investigation. (Those haters started
    sweatin' my homeys and my peeps. I got real
    pissed when they tried to make me look like
    I'm not real or something. As a matter of
    fact their shady asses are on the take anyway).

    This has gone on too long, cost too much and
    hurt too many innocent people. (Tryin' to hit
    me they wasted a lot of Cheddar and pissed off
    my Crew).

    Nothing is more important to me personally.
    But it is private, and I intend to reclaim my
    family life for my family. It's nobody's
    business but ours. (I'm a pimp and playa and
    I'm going to be one! Get some business'.
    Hillary is chill because I got more than
    enough White Water dirt on her ass, that
    will get her sent up before I'm outta here).

    It is time to stop the pursuit of personal
    destruction and the prying into private life
    andget on with our national life. (Quit
    harassing me because I'm going to Floss
    regardless. Just in case y'all forgot until
    you chumps ax me I'm still the shit!)

    Now it is time - in fact, it is past time
    - to move on. (Fuck all y'all, I don't
    give a fuck!)

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