The weekend comes soon. Hope everyone gets over the present world situation, relaxes, and starts anew. Here's a few little laffs to keep us in a better frame of mind. I hope I'm not repeating, but finding the other half of the RD jokes I posted earlier this week. Get ready to smile.
50. What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!
51. Why did the car get a flat tire? Because there was a fork in the road.
52. How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten-tickles.
53. How did the Vikings communicate? With Norse code.
54. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.
55. What do you call a well-dressed lion? A dandelion.
56. What happens to a frog’s car when it breaks down? It gets toad away.
57. What kind of car does an egg drive? A Yolkswagen.
58. There were two muffins in an oven, and one said, “It’s getting hot in here, isn’t it?” The other muffin gasped, “Aah! A talking muffin!”
59. What was Beethoven’s favorite fruit? A ba-na-na-na.
60. What do you call a female chicken staring at a pile of lettuce? A Chicken Caesar Salad.
61. How do trees access their email? They log in.
62. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? They make up everything.
63. Which program do Jedi use to sign their files? Adobe Sign Kenobi.
64. What is the best way to criticize your boss? Very quietly, so she cannot hear you.
65. Our computers went down at the office today, so we had to do everything manually. It took me 15 minutes to shuffle the cards for Solitaire.
66. How do folks at NASA organize a party? They planet.
67. Why don’t comedians tell unemployment jokes? None of them work.
68. Why does Snoop Dogg use an umbrella? Fo drizzle.
69. How many computer programmers does it take to change a light bulb? None—that’s a hardware issue.
70. A salesperson came into an office one day and said, “This computer will cut your workload by 50%!” The office manager replied, “Great, I’ll take two of them!”
71. What do you call someone who is happy on Mondays? Unemployed.
72. What do you call 12 people doing the work of one? A committee.
73. Why didn’t the Terminator upgrade to Windows 10? I asked him and he said, “I still love Vista, baby.”
74. To the person who stole my copy of Microsoft Office, I will find you. You have my Word.
75. What kind of award does the world’s top dentist get? A little plaque.
76. To err is human. To blame it on someone else shows management potential.
77. If it wasn’t for the last minute, nothing would get done.
78. Archaeologist: someone whose career lies in ruins.
79. The trouble with being punctual is that nobody’s there to appreciate it.
80. I think they picked me for my motivational skills. Everyone always says they have to work twice as hard when I’m around!
Wishing all of you well. My puppies will be one year old on 10/17/23! They're so cute!!! I couldn't part with any one of them, and didn't try.
, but one of my Texas cousins and her husband recently took one of those world cruises beginning in Australia/New Zealand, many many Asian ports and points of interest, many many Mediterranean ports and points of interest. I think they were gone for I want to say three months? But they enjoyed it immensely. Pretty pricey though. Hombre and I could never afford it. But if we could I sure would consider it.
