I can't sleep. Moody again. Restless. So...I took my flashlight and had a little stroll down the street. Not very far though. I went 3 doors down and wandered my old back yard...sat on the pavers I laid on the back patio, listened to non familiar sounds since he had all the Hummer feeders, bird feeders removed, along with both sheds. All the critters that called the yard home have lost theirs as well as we did.
After t touched a few trees still there to say my hello, i thought...what the hell...may as well try the back door I installed from the master bedroom and lo...it was unlocked. So, of course I entered. He painted every room, re-popcorned the ceilings, but left the tree I painted in the entryway. He also replaced all the doors that had doggy doors installed. I meandered thru each and every room at my leisure, knowing that very soon it will no longer be an empty house. I also looked in the kitchen cabinets, and was surprised to see the dishes, pots, pans, utensils I left for him to use if he wished. Actually, I left many things for him because he said to. Cleansers still under the sinks, the new washer, the dryer, the fridge, toaster, etc.
He erased us, but I was still there. So, I saw my second favorite coffee cup and my favorite spatula I forgot to pack and...I took them both. They are now with me in the RV. I almost took the big cement pelican and vac cleaner too but didn't. I felt like it would be stealing..even though they are mine. So I left them there. I also smiled wryly seeing my name still on a tag on a cabinet for when I had roomies to show which cabinet belonged to whom. Good. I hope it never peels off. He can see my name forever and be reminded of the person now homeless because he went back on his word.
For me, your word is your bond. He is NOT sick. He lied to us. So, paybacks is my name on a cabinet, a tree painted on his entryway wall, a missing cup and a old, used round spatula.
Do I feel better? Nope. Just more bummed.
What I just flat don't understand is why he tore down the sheetrock, ceiling, insulation in the garage. That was improvement to the property,because it was still a garage...but with walls. And why he tore down the patio room. Another improvement. And over 1200.00 WE invested in doing it out of our own money. Weird.
He did repaint some of the exterior with the same color I picked and named with his own name. I guess he liked my taste in color. Maybe his new girlfriend did too. Yes, he has a lady now. And I am betting SHE had a big part in his find to get us out so she could move in with him in his house.
Anyway...I got to hug my trees, touch the dirt under the one holding the ashes of 3 of my furkid buried there, got my coffee mug and spatula and walk the home that was mine for 13 years this recent past November..or rather would have been but we gave him back his house Sept 17th...so 2 months shy of 13 years.
Maybe I can sleep now. I got to go "home" for a brief period of time. All by myself, too. I enjoyed it, and was saddened all at the same time. Talk about battles of emotions during that brief trespass! I think I am mentally worn out now. But tomorrow morning...the coffee I will be drinking will be from that cup!
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