Two Women Talking

[Bootneck]

Two Middle East mothers are sitting in the cafe chatting over a
pint of goat's milk.

The older of the mothers pulls her bag out and starts flipping
through pictures and they start reminiscing.

"This is my oldest son Mohammed. He's 24 years old now."

"Yes, I remember him as a baby," says the other mother cheerfully.

"He's a martyr now though," mum confides.

"Oh, so sad dear," says the other.

"And this is my second son, Khalid. He's 21."

"Oh, I remember him," says the other happily, "he had such curly
hair when he was born."
"He's a martyr too," says mum quietly.

"Oh gracious me " says the other.

"And this is my third son. My baby. My beautiful Ahmed. He's
18," she whispers.

"Yes," says the friend enthusiastically, "I remember when he first
started school."

"He's a martyr also," says mum, with tears in her eyes.

After a pause and a deep sigh, the second Muslim mother looks
wistfully at the photographs and says..

"They blow up so fast, don't they?"

 

[xsited1]

You just insulted Muslims...

 

[Bootneck]

You just insulted Muslims...

Don't be silly. Muslims never get offended!

 

[xsited1]

You just insulted Muslims...

Don't be silly. Muslims never get offended!

Do you have any other good jokes involving Islam? I've heard that one.

 

[Bootneck]

You just insulted Muslims...

Don't be silly. Muslims never get offended!

Do you have any other good jokes involving Islam? I've heard that one.

Two women on jihad go to a camping shop to buy knapsacks. One picks out a rather fashionable number. Sliding her arms through the straps to try it for size, looks over her back into the mirror and says to her friend, "Does my bomb look big in this?"

 

[xsited1]

Don't be silly. Muslims never get offended!

Do you have any other good jokes involving Islam? I've heard that one.

Two women on jihad go to a camping shop to buy knapsacks. One picks out a rather fashionable number. Sliding her arms through the straps to try it for size, looks over her back into the mirror and says to her friend, "Does my bomb look big in this?"

Haven't heard that one!

I found some great Muslim jokes here:

Muslim Humor - Muslim Jokes from Planck's Constant

Q. How many muslims does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
A. What's toilet paper?

Q. What do you say to a Muslim with his arm all the way up a camel's rump?
A. "Having car trouble?"

 

[xotoxi]

Beware of the Ayatollah's Shit List!

Salman Rushdie

Kurt Westergaard

Bootneck (NEW ADDITION!!!)

xsited1 (NEW ADDITION!!!)

 

[Phoenix]

Two Middle East mothers are sitting in the cafe chatting over a
pint of goat's milk.

The older of the mothers pulls her bag out and starts flipping
through pictures and they start reminiscing.

"This is my oldest son Mohammed. He's 24 years old now."

"Yes, I remember him as a baby," says the other mother cheerfully.

"He's a martyr now though," mum confides.

"Oh, so sad dear," says the other.

"And this is my second son, Khalid. He's 21."

"Oh, I remember him," says the other happily, "he had such curly
hair when he was born."
"He's a martyr too," says mum quietly.

"Oh gracious me " says the other.

"And this is my third son. My baby. My beautiful Ahmed. He's
18," she whispers.

"Yes," says the friend enthusiastically, "I remember when he first
started school."

"He's a martyr also," says mum, with tears in her eyes.

After a pause and a deep sigh, the second Muslim mother looks
wistfully at the photographs and says..

"They blow up so fast, don't they?"

*delicately wipes spit water off the computer screen*

 

[dilloduck]

Two Middle East mothers are sitting in the cafe chatting over a
pint of goat's milk.

The older of the mothers pulls her bag out and starts flipping
through pictures and they start reminiscing.

"This is my oldest son Mohammed. He's 24 years old now."

"Yes, I remember him as a baby," says the other mother cheerfully.

"He's a martyr now though," mum confides.

"Oh, so sad dear," says the other.

"And this is my second son, Khalid. He's 21."

"Oh, I remember him," says the other happily, "he had such curly
hair when he was born."
"He's a martyr too," says mum quietly.

"Oh gracious me " says the other.

"And this is my third son. My baby. My beautiful Ahmed. He's
18," she whispers.

"Yes," says the friend enthusiastically, "I remember when he first
started school."

"He's a martyr also," says mum, with tears in her eyes.

After a pause and a deep sigh, the second Muslim mother looks
wistfully at the photographs and says..

"They blow up so fast, don't they?"

*delicately wipes spit water off the computer screen*

get that veil back on .. woman !!

 

[Phoenix]

*delicately wipes spit water off the computer screen*

get that veil back on .. woman !!

Sorry.

I used it to wipe off the computer screen.

 

[xotoxi]

*delicately wipes spit water off the computer screen*

get that veil back on .. woman !!

Sorry.

I used it to wipe off the computer screen.

Great! Now there is stool stains on the computer screen!

Had you kept your hijab properly in place (on your head and face!) there would have been no spitting of water onto the computer screen as it would have absorbed the liquid!

More disturbing is that your husband allows you to engage in such un-ladylike endeavors...like the internet. Especially USMB, which is a cesspool of immorality.

Your husband should be stoned.

 

[dilloduck]

get that veil back on .. woman !!

Sorry.

I used it to wipe off the computer screen.

Great! Now there is stool stains on the computer screen!

Had you kept your hijab properly in place (on your head and face!) there would have been no spitting of water onto the computer screen as it would have absorbed the liquid!

More disturbing is that your husband allows you to engage in such un-ladylike endeavors...like the internet. Especially USMB, which is a cesspool of immorality.

Your husband should be stoned.

or at least drunk

 

[Phoenix]

Sorry.

I used it to wipe off the computer screen.

Great! Now there is stool stains on the computer screen!

Had you kept your hijab properly in place (on your head and face!) there would have been no spitting of water onto the computer screen as it would have absorbed the liquid!

More disturbing is that your husband allows you to engage in such un-ladylike endeavors...like the internet. Especially USMB, which is a cesspool of immorality.

Your husband should be stoned.

or at least drunk

Y'all are on your game tonight.

 

[dilloduck]

Xot taught me everything I know----nice old guy.

 

[Phoenix]

Xot taught me everything I know----nice old guy.

Old? He doesn't seem old ...

In any case, you learned well, young Jedi.

 

[xotoxi]

Xot taught me everything I know----nice old guy.

Old? He doesn't seem old ...

In any case, you learned well, young Jedi.

I'm 387 years old. I will impart my vast knowledge of wit to anyone who would like to learn...and everyone else will just have to deal with it.

 

[dilloduck]

Xot taught me everything I know----nice old guy.

Old? He doesn't seem old ...

In any case, you learned well, young Jedi.

I'm 387 years old. I will impart my vast knowledge of wit to anyone who would like to learn...and everyone else will just have to deal with it.

I used that "pull my finger" trick you taught me on my date the other night--went over swell.

 

[xotoxi]

Old? He doesn't seem old ...

In any case, you learned well, young Jedi.

I'm 387 years old. I will impart my vast knowledge of wit to anyone who would like to learn...and everyone else will just have to deal with it.

I used that "pull my finger" trick you taught me on my date the other night--went over swell.

That's always a good one.

I consider that foreplay leading up to a satisfying Cleveland Steamer.

 

[Phoenix]

Old? He doesn't seem old ...

In any case, you learned well, young Jedi.

I'm 387 years old. I will impart my vast knowledge of wit to anyone who would like to learn...and everyone else will just have to deal with it.

Most excellent.

Carry on then.

 

[dilloduck]

I'm 387 years old. I will impart my vast knowledge of wit to anyone who would like to learn...and everyone else will just have to deal with it.

I used that "pull my finger" trick you taught me on my date the other night--went over swell.

That's always a good one.

I consider that foreplay leading up to a satisfying Cleveland Steamer.

Right up there with the hot beef injections I sold on Waikiki in the 70's.