Transgender teen: 'My death needs to mean something'

[Luddly Neddite]

Transgender teen: 'My death needs to mean something'
USA Today Network Sharon Coolidge, The Cincinnati Enquirer 4:17 p.m. EST December 30, 2014

(Photo: Provided/Abigail Jones)

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Editor's note: Leelah's suicide and the conversation her note inspired has rocked families in the Ohio region, becoming part of a national conversation. Here, we share the facts and report what happened.

In life, Leelah Alcorn felt alone. Born male, she feared she would never be the woman she felt like inside. In death, the transgender 17-year-old -- born Josh Alcorn -- wanted to make sure others never felt that way she did.

"The only way I will rest in peace is if one day transgender people aren't treated the way I was, they're treated like humans, with valid feelings and human rights," Alcorn wrote in a post on Tumblr.

Her parents, she wrote, wanted her to be a "perfect little straight Christian boy."

"My death needs to mean something," she wrote in the post, which she scheduled to appear the day after her death.

Her final public words: "Fix society. Please."

What a sad sad tragedy.

We've got to stop punishing people for no other reason than our own insecurities.

 

[Michelle420]

So sad that her parents didn't accept her and she felt so isolated.

I wish she has reached out to others.

 

[SmarterThanTheAverageBear]

very sad that that young man's parents didn't get him the mental help he so obviously needed

 

[Katzndogz]

The sad fact is he would never be the woman he felt like inside. No matter what he did or what was done to him he was never really going to be a woman. This is the tragedy of mental illness.

 

[TheOldSchool]

The sad fact is he would never be the woman he felt like inside. No matter what he did or what was done to him he was never really going to be a woman. This is the tragedy of mental illness.

^ Katz has lots of first-hand experience with mental illness.

 

[Luddly Neddite]

So sad that her parents didn't accept her and she felt so isolated.

I wish she has reached out to others.

They have to live with contributing to their daughter's death.


Beautiful and intelligent girl.

 

[g5000]

You can read his/her suicide note here: satan s wifey

(S)he also left notes of apology. The one to his parents reads thusly:

Mom and Dad: Fuck you. You can’t just control other people like that. That’s messed up.

If he wanted to hurt his parents, he did a helluva job. That's a mean note to go out on. And the job of parents is exactly about control their children to prepare them for the world. They might have been misguided and uninformed on how to handle a kid like this one, but they certainly don't deserve a vicious last word like that.


His/her suicide note sounds very self-centered. I understand the difficulties such a person must go through, but he was still a child and a child should not be finalizing any decisions as important as a sex change. We don't allow kids to drink or smoke or vote or do any number of things for good reason. A sex change is an even bigger decision making process than any of those.

I am not unsympathetic to this kid. One of my own kids had a friend sleepover once. A girl who was actually a boy. In first grade! This kid wanted to be a girl, grew out his/her hair like a girl and because the child was so young, he was easily able to pass as a girl. My kids never caught on. I would not have caught on either if the grandfather had not told me.

I don't know what the full situation was, but the kid was living with his/her grandfather instead of the parents. I don't know the story behind that.

We were in an extremely awkward situation when the kid arrived. He/she was filthy. His/her clothes were filthy and the kid was covered from head to foot in dirt and grime. This was neglect.

We made the very risky decision to give the kid a bath. I had my wife do it. There was no way I was going to do it, but there was also no way I was not going to take care of this kid, either. I freely admit I was completely skeeved by the idea of a first grader who wanted to be a girl who was born a boy, but my instincts as a parent were stronger. This kid needed some compassion and some decent treatment.

The clothes were so ragged and filthy, we threw them out and gave the kid a new set of clothes.

We informed the grandfather the next day when he picked the kid up, and he just nodded.

God only knows what kind of nightmare world that child is living in.

So I understand how someone like that can have their whole world view narrowed down to a tiny pinpoint of self-centered misery and an attitude of there being no way out.

But there is a way out. The kid who killed himself just didn't make it that far. This is a very very sad story through and through.

 

[Luddly Neddite]

The sad fact is he would never be the woman he felt like inside. No matter what he did or what was done to him he was never really going to be a woman. This is the tragedy of mental illness.

^ Katz has lots of first-hand experience with mental illness.

Also with being a doctor, lawyer and dog washer and a drunk cat collector ...

 

[Steve_McGarrett]

So sad that her parents didn't accept her and she felt so isolated.

I wish she has reached out to others.

They have to live with contributing to their daughter's death.


Beautiful and intelligent girl.

You are just as sick in the head as he. He was their son, not daughter.

 

[Luddly Neddite]

You can read his/her suicide note here: satan s wifey

(S)he also left notes of apology. The one to his parents reads thusly:

Mom and Dad: Fuck you. You can’t just control other people like that. That’s messed up.

If he wanted to hurt his parents, he did a helluva job. That's a mean note to go out on. And the job of parents is exactly about control their children to prepare them for the world. They might have been misguided and uninformed on how to handle a kid like this one, but they certainly don't deserve a vicious last word like that.


His/her suicide note sounds very self-centered. I understand the difficulties such a person must go through, but he was still a child and a child should not be finalizing any decisions as important as a sex change. We don't allow kids to drink or smoke or vote or do any number of things for good reason. A sex change is an even bigger decision making process than any of those.

I am not unsympathetic to this kid. One of my own kids had a friend sleepover once. A girl who was actually a boy. In first grade! This kid wanted to be a girl, grew out his/her hair like a girl and because the child was so young, he was easily able to pass as a girl. My kids never caught on. I would not have caught on either if the grandfather had not told me.

I don't know what the full situation was, but the kid was living with his/her grandfather instead of the parents. I don't know the story behind that.

We were in an extremely awkward situation when the kid arrived. He/she was filthy. His/her clothes were filthy and the kid was covered from head to foot in dirt and grime. This was neglect.

We made the very risky decision to give the kid a bath. I had my wife do it. There was no way I was going to do it, but there was also no way I was not going to take care of this kid, either.

The clothes were so ragged and filthy, we threw them out and gave the kid a new set of clothes.

We informed the grandfather the next day when he picked the kid up, and he just nodded.

God only knows what kind of nightmare world that child is living in.

So I understand how someone like that can have their whole world view narrowed down to a tiny pinpoint of self-centered misery and an attitude of their being no way out.

But there is a way out. The kid who killed himself just didn't make it that far. This is a very very sad story through and through.

"The kid who killed himself just didn't make it that far."

Most of us never have to face the fear and confusion this girl did. Most of us cannot imagine what it would be like to know we are female and yet have the world continue to call us a male. Even after her death, there are people who will not accept that she was female. How any young person can be strong enough to get through that dark tunnel is beyond my understanding.

Transgender people must be among the bravest people in the world.

 

[Steve_McGarrett]

You can read his/her suicide note here: satan s wifey

(S)he also left notes of apology. The one to his parents reads thusly:

Mom and Dad: Fuck you. You can’t just control other people like that. That’s messed up.

If he wanted to hurt his parents, he did a helluva job. That's a mean note to go out on. And the job of parents is exactly about control their children to prepare them for the world. They might have been misguided and uninformed on how to handle a kid like this one, but they certainly don't deserve a vicious last word like that.


His/her suicide note sounds very self-centered. I understand the difficulties such a person must go through, but he was still a child and a child should not be finalizing any decisions as important as a sex change. We don't allow kids to drink or smoke or vote or do any number of things for good reason. A sex change is an even bigger decision making process than any of those.

I am not unsympathetic to this kid. One of my own kids had a friend sleepover once. A girl who was actually a boy. In first grade! This kid wanted to be a girl, grew out his/her hair like a girl and because the child was so young, he was easily able to pass as a girl. My kids never caught on. I would not have caught on either if the grandfather had not told me.

I don't know what the full situation was, but the kid was living with his/her grandfather instead of the parents. I don't know the story behind that.

We were in an extremely awkward situation when the kid arrived. He/she was filthy. His/her clothes were filthy and the kid was covered from head to foot in dirt and grime. This was neglect.

We made the very risky decision to give the kid a bath. I had my wife do it. There was no way I was going to do it, but there was also no way I was not going to take care of this kid, either. I freely admit I was completely skeeved by the idea of a first grader who wanted to be a girl who was born a boy, but my instincts as a parent were stronger. This kid needed some compassion and some decent treatment.

The clothes were so ragged and filthy, we threw them out and gave the kid a new set of clothes.

We informed the grandfather the next day when he picked the kid up, and he just nodded.

God only knows what kind of nightmare world that child is living in.

So I understand how someone like that can have their whole world view narrowed down to a tiny pinpoint of self-centered misery and an attitude of there being no way out.

But there is a way out. The kid who killed himself just didn't make it that far. This is a very very sad story through and through.

I hope you never allowed your kid to see that twisted kid again. I certainly wouldn't have.

 

[R.D.]

So sad that her parents didn't accept her and she felt so isolated.

I wish she has reached out to others.

They have to live with contributing to their daughter's death.


Beautiful and intelligent girl.

DNA says otherwise.

Teen suicide isn't uncommon. This case is a sad as all the others, nothing special. Blaming his parents was part of his problem. What's your problem?

 

[g5000]

You can read his/her suicide note here: satan s wifey

(S)he also left notes of apology. The one to his parents reads thusly:

Mom and Dad: Fuck you. You can’t just control other people like that. That’s messed up.

If he wanted to hurt his parents, he did a helluva job. That's a mean note to go out on. And the job of parents is exactly about control their children to prepare them for the world. They might have been misguided and uninformed on how to handle a kid like this one, but they certainly don't deserve a vicious last word like that.


His/her suicide note sounds very self-centered. I understand the difficulties such a person must go through, but he was still a child and a child should not be finalizing any decisions as important as a sex change. We don't allow kids to drink or smoke or vote or do any number of things for good reason. A sex change is an even bigger decision making process than any of those.

I am not unsympathetic to this kid. One of my own kids had a friend sleepover once. A girl who was actually a boy. In first grade! This kid wanted to be a girl, grew out his/her hair like a girl and because the child was so young, he was easily able to pass as a girl. My kids never caught on. I would not have caught on either if the grandfather had not told me.

I don't know what the full situation was, but the kid was living with his/her grandfather instead of the parents. I don't know the story behind that.

We were in an extremely awkward situation when the kid arrived. He/she was filthy. His/her clothes were filthy and the kid was covered from head to foot in dirt and grime. This was neglect.

We made the very risky decision to give the kid a bath. I had my wife do it. There was no way I was going to do it, but there was also no way I was not going to take care of this kid, either. I freely admit I was completely skeeved by the idea of a first grader who wanted to be a girl who was born a boy, but my instincts as a parent were stronger. This kid needed some compassion and some decent treatment.

The clothes were so ragged and filthy, we threw them out and gave the kid a new set of clothes.

We informed the grandfather the next day when he picked the kid up, and he just nodded.

God only knows what kind of nightmare world that child is living in.

So I understand how someone like that can have their whole world view narrowed down to a tiny pinpoint of self-centered misery and an attitude of there being no way out.

But there is a way out. The kid who killed himself just didn't make it that far. This is a very very sad story through and through.

I hope you never allowed your kid to see that twisted kid again. I certainly wouldn't have.

That child was nowhere near as twisted as you.

 

[Katzndogz]

So sad that her parents didn't accept her and she felt so isolated.

I wish she has reached out to others.

Does it say in the article that his parents didn't accept him?

He feared that he would never be the woman that he felt like inside.

Not everyone is going to treat him the way he feels he should be treated. He needed psychiatric help to understand that he can't control others. He can't control how they feel or the opinions they have. This is a hallmark of the mentally ill. The need to exert total control over someone else.

His parents should have gotten him psychiatric help and recognized what this need to control could lead to.

 

[Steve_McGarrett]

You can read his/her suicide note here: satan s wifey

(S)he also left notes of apology. The one to his parents reads thusly:

Mom and Dad: Fuck you. You can’t just control other people like that. That’s messed up.

If he wanted to hurt his parents, he did a helluva job. That's a mean note to go out on. And the job of parents is exactly about control their children to prepare them for the world. They might have been misguided and uninformed on how to handle a kid like this one, but they certainly don't deserve a vicious last word like that.


His/her suicide note sounds very self-centered. I understand the difficulties such a person must go through, but he was still a child and a child should not be finalizing any decisions as important as a sex change. We don't allow kids to drink or smoke or vote or do any number of things for good reason. A sex change is an even bigger decision making process than any of those.

I am not unsympathetic to this kid. One of my own kids had a friend sleepover once. A girl who was actually a boy. In first grade! This kid wanted to be a girl, grew out his/her hair like a girl and because the child was so young, he was easily able to pass as a girl. My kids never caught on. I would not have caught on either if the grandfather had not told me.

I don't know what the full situation was, but the kid was living with his/her grandfather instead of the parents. I don't know the story behind that.

We were in an extremely awkward situation when the kid arrived. He/she was filthy. His/her clothes were filthy and the kid was covered from head to foot in dirt and grime. This was neglect.

We made the very risky decision to give the kid a bath. I had my wife do it. There was no way I was going to do it, but there was also no way I was not going to take care of this kid, either. I freely admit I was completely skeeved by the idea of a first grader who wanted to be a girl who was born a boy, but my instincts as a parent were stronger. This kid needed some compassion and some decent treatment.

The clothes were so ragged and filthy, we threw them out and gave the kid a new set of clothes.

We informed the grandfather the next day when he picked the kid up, and he just nodded.

God only knows what kind of nightmare world that child is living in.

So I understand how someone like that can have their whole world view narrowed down to a tiny pinpoint of self-centered misery and an attitude of there being no way out.

But there is a way out. The kid who killed himself just didn't make it that far. This is a very very sad story through and through.

I hope you never allowed your kid to see that twisted kid again. I certainly wouldn't have.

That child was nowhere near as twisted as you.

Nope. The child you let sleep over was mentally ill.

 

[bucs90]

Sad story. Suicide is the most selfish thing a young person with a family can do.

That said...yes. Our society needs to stop hating each other. And SOME in our society need to stop being so easy to dislike with their animalistic behavior.

 

[Michelle420]

So sad that her parents didn't accept her and she felt so isolated.

I wish she has reached out to others.

Does it say in the article that his parents didn't accept him?

He feared that he would never be the woman that he felt like inside.

Not everyone is going to treat him the way he feels he should be treated. He needed psychiatric help to understand that he can't control others. He can't control how they feel or the opinions they have. This is a hallmark of the mentally ill. The need to exert total control over someone else.

His parents should have gotten him psychiatric help and recognized what this need to control could lead to.

Her note said so.

Gender roles are socially constructed.

It's a shame this society is so consumed with it.

 

[Katzndogz]

Teens were committing suicide because Pandora the planet in Avatar wasn't real and they would never go there.

 

[Skull Pilot]

Suicide never means anything.

Alas this kid will be forgotten. He could have done more if he decided to live.

 

[SmarterThanTheAverageBear]

So sad that her parents didn't accept her and she felt so isolated.

I wish she has reached out to others.

Does it say in the article that his parents didn't accept him?

He feared that he would never be the woman that he felt like inside.

Not everyone is going to treat him the way he feels he should be treated. He needed psychiatric help to understand that he can't control others. He can't control how they feel or the opinions they have. This is a hallmark of the mentally ill. The need to exert total control over someone else.

His parents should have gotten him psychiatric help and recognized what this need to control could lead to.

Her note said so.

Gender roles are socially constructed.

It's a shame this society is so consumed with it.

Gender roles are social constructs,but genders are not.

This was a mentally disturbed BOY