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To ventilate or not to ventilate.

evenflow1969

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I need to stay as healthy as possible. If I get sick...we both are lost and at the mercy of...whomever. I have to be at the hospital..OUTSIDE...at 10am to meet the notary lady that is coming to notarize a power of attorney for me...without me present since I am not allowed inside. This is so I can do his finances, etc. Then I have to take that paper to the bank so I can withdraw or deposit monies in his account and take care of financial business on his part. Then I have to get my van out of the repair shop, call yolanda at the hospice place and see if she has advice for me, then harass the hospital for answers they are not giving, then check the bank for his ss deposit and get a copy of what is in there so I can tell Dennis (MrG) what his balance is, yadda yadda. And hanging over my head is him asking ME what I think he should do and me telling him its his choice..I will back him in whatever he decides but both of us not knowing WHAT to decide BECAUSE WE ARE NOT GETTING AQNY FUCKING ANSSWERS. Covid, ya know. Too busy with sick people and he is just an old man with a disease we didn't even know existed until last month.
Well my sister has been ran ragged do to covid. Not just do to amount of patients but also do to staff shortages being out with covid. My father died in December not do directly to covid but the ICU was filled and not enough man power to deal with the patio coming in. Dad likely would have lived longer under normal circumstances. As far as decision s for what Mr g wants to do I would choose to spend my limited time at home for what that is worth.
 
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Gracie

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Doc will be calling me today after confering with other doc. So I will get the answers to two questions...which is paramount to Dennis
decision.

1. What is his prognosis and extent of this disease? 6 months? 1 year? more years? How severe is the lung damage?

2. Will he be able to breathe once those tubes are out of his chest, with oxygen tanks and his oxygen concentrator? If not...then that answers all the questions....he will HAVE to be ventilated and once ventilated...there is no coming back. He will stay in a drug induced coma on a machine until I pull the plug....which I will have to do after awhile. I will have to ask dennis WHEN he wants the plug pulled. A month later? 3 months later? Sooner? Later?

Meanwhile, power of attorney is being done today at 10am, running around doing what needs done while Dennis is lucid, alert and capable of answering questions as to his desires, etc.

Once I get the call from the doc...I will call Dennis...then we can do the advance directive so the hospital knows his needs and wants...and I will have the power of attorney as well.

So...its another waiting game today until the doc sees him this afternoon.
 
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Gracie

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I will fall apart later tonight once all this is done. I will try to not come in here yelling and screaming and crying.
 

task0778

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I will fall apart later tonight once all this is done. I will try to not come in here yelling and screaming and crying.

LOL, why should you be any different? Hey, we are all here for ya, feel free to vent all you want. For all the bitching about this board, we got a lot of good people here.
 

Foxfyre

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Dr Google is better at answering my questions than the ICU docs. Now I am leaning on recommending to Dennis to come home. Slower death, but at least he may last a bit longer...as long as he is not in pain or scared, and scared he is when he can't breathe.

I have to study on this some more. Please God, keep me healthy enough to do what needs done.
I post this in the Coffee Shop too:

You have the prayers. At least daily. Sometimes more often. I read through the recent posts on the other thread and recommend that unless you have somebody with you 24/7, you don't bring him home. Nobody is strong enough to be the caretaker of a critically ill person 24/7 by themselves and you would quickly do yourself in trying. The hospital does have people there for him 24/7. Those inlaws in Arizona. Would they come to help? I fully understand why you resist the vax, but if you accepted at least one dose, they would allow you in to be with him. That might be your best bet at this time for his peace of mind and yours.
 
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Gracie

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And I posted this in the coffee shop, lol.

I have come to the conclusion..after MUCH studing via google, that suppliments and herbal remedies of tea, etc...have a BIG effect on IPF. Chinese medicine is leaps and bounds into such remedies. Hell, if they can make covid, they can make herbal remedies. I am not ready to let him die. Alone. If he has to die, then dammit..he can do it right here with hospice but NOT YET. I aim to fight. I want him to, too. I will talk to him tomorrow and tell him all that I have learned and I have learned A LOT.
Prayers work too.
 

Coyote

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I need to stay as healthy as possible. If I get sick...we both are lost and at the mercy of...whomever. I have to be at the hospital..OUTSIDE...at 10am to meet the notary lady that is coming to notarize a power of attorney for me...without me present since I am not allowed inside. This is so I can do his finances, etc. Then I have to take that paper to the bank so I can withdraw or deposit monies in his account and take care of financial business on his part. Then I have to get my van out of the repair shop, call yolanda at the hospice place and see if she has advice for me, then harass the hospital for answers they are not giving, then check the bank for his ss deposit and get a copy of what is in there so I can tell Dennis (MrG) what his balance is, yadda yadda. And hanging over my head is him asking ME what I think he should do and me telling him its his choice..I will back him in whatever he decides but both of us not knowing WHAT to decide BECAUSE WE ARE NOT GETTING AQNY FUCKING ANSSWERS. Covid, ya know. Too busy with sick people and he is just an old man with a disease we didn't even know existed until last month.
God Gracie, what a nightmare for you and Dennis, I don’t have any advice…I don’t know what to do either, but for you :smiliehug:
 

Coyote

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I will fall apart later tonight once all this is done. I will try to not come in here yelling and screaming and crying.
This is the place to do it…we understand :smiliehug:
 

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