Secular Humanist (aka athiest) attack on christians continues

[g5000]

Seriously, I want to detour on my next trip to Philly and check this out, but my wife is convinced (probably correctly) that I won't be able to keep a straight face and will start laughing at an inappropriate time.

Some of the promotional material on their web site is unintentionally hilarious:

A life-sized Noah's Ark experience.
Come and be amazed.

From the moment you turn the corner and the towering Ark comes into view, to the friendly animals in the zoo, to the jaw-dropping exhibits inside the Ark, you’ll experience the pages of the Bible like never before.

 

[Syriusly]

Seriously, I want to detour on my next trip to Philly and check this out, but my wife is convinced (probably correctly) that I won't be able to keep a straight face and will start laughing at an inappropriate time.

Some of the promotional material on their web site is unintentionally hilarious:

A life-sized Noah's Ark experience.
Come and be amazed.

From the moment you turn the corner and the towering Ark comes into view, to the friendly animals in the zoo, to the jaw-dropping exhibits inside the Ark, you’ll experience the pages of the Bible like never before.

I wonder if they have a diorama of Noah's daughter's getting him drunk and having sex with him?

 

[g5000]

Seriously, I want to detour on my next trip to Philly and check this out, but my wife is convinced (probably correctly) that I won't be able to keep a straight face and will start laughing at an inappropriate time.

Some of the promotional material on their web site is unintentionally hilarious:

A life-sized Noah's Ark experience.
Come and be amazed.

From the moment you turn the corner and the towering Ark comes into view, to the friendly animals in the zoo, to the jaw-dropping exhibits inside the Ark, you’ll experience the pages of the Bible like never before.

I wonder if they have a diorama of Noah's daughter's getting him drunk and having sex with him?

That was Lot, not Noah.

Noah got drunk and passed out naked. His son Ham saw him naked and told his two brothers. When Noah sobered up, he cursed Ham's son (his grandson), and a whole bunch of my Southern in-laws used to tell me that justified making black people slaves.

I kid you not.

 

[bendog]

Seriously, I want to detour on my next trip to Philly and check this out, but my wife is convinced (probably correctly) that I won't be able to keep a straight face and will start laughing at an inappropriate time.

Some of the promotional material on their web site is unintentionally hilarious:

A life-sized Noah's Ark experience.
Come and be amazed.

From the moment you turn the corner and the towering Ark comes into view, to the friendly animals in the zoo, to the jaw-dropping exhibits inside the Ark, you’ll experience the pages of the Bible like never before.

I wonder if they have a diorama of Noah's daughter's getting him drunk and having sex with him?

I thought that was Lot. But the Noah thing creeped me out too.
The Sons of Noah

8 The sons of Noah who came out of the ark were Shem, Ham and Japheth.EA)' data-cr="#cen-NIV-224EA"> (Ham was the father of Canaan.)EB)' data-cr="#cen-NIV-224EB"> 19 These were the three sons of Noah,EC)' data-cr="#cen-NIV-225EC"> and from them came the people who were scattered over the whole earth.ED)' data-cr="#cen-NIV-225ED">

20 Noah, a man of the soil, proceededj]' data-fn="#fen-NIV-226j">[j] to plant a vineyard. 21 When he drank some of its wine,EE)' data-cr="#cen-NIV-227EE"> he became drunk and lay uncovered inside his tent. 22 Ham, the father of Canaan, saw his father nakedEF)' data-cr="#cen-NIV-228EF"> and told his two brothers outside. 23 But Shem and Japheth took a garment and laid it across their shoulders; then they walked in backward and covered their father’s naked body. Their faces were turned the other way so that they would not see their father naked.

24 When Noah awoke from his wine and found out what his youngest son had done to him, 25 he said,

“CursedEG)' data-cr="#cen-NIV-231EG"> be Canaan!EH)' data-cr="#cen-NIV-231EH">
The lowest of slaves
will he be to his brothers.EI)' data-cr="#cen-NIV-231EI">”

I'm thinking Ham might have done more that just look.

 

[g5000]

Genesis 9: 20-25

Noah, a man of the soil, proceeded to plant a vineyard. When he drank some of its wine, he became drunk and lay uncovered inside his tent. Ham, the father of Canaan, saw his father naked and told his two brothers outside. But Shem and Japheth took a garment and laid it across their shoulders; then they walked in backward and covered their father’s naked body. Their faces were turned the other way so that they would not see their father naked.

When Noah awoke from his wine and found out what his youngest son had done to him, he said,

“Cursed be Canaan!
The lowest of slaves
will he be to his brothers."

And that is why it is okay for blacks to be our slaves, boys and girls. Now join me in the Christ Theater for some exciting dinosaur action!

 

[g5000]

Poor Canaan. He wasn't even there, and he is cursed to be a slave by grandpa.

 

[JakeStarkey]

Well, it's finally opened: Noah's Ark theme park opens in Kentucky with life-size replica - BBC News

Check out the dinosaurs on the Ark!

I wonder where Noah put the Raptors and T-Rex's

 

[NYcarbineer]

AS a general rule, I'm a big fan of letting the guy who is signing the check decide who he hires. I support equal opportunity for all, but I can't help thinking that businesses should be able to pass on employees who do not believe in the business or the business model. How can that be an effective employee?

But yeah, maybe deciding to pass on some of the government freebies, might free them up to do that?

So no one who believes government should be smaller should be hired for a government job?

 

[Syriusly]

Seriously, I want to detour on my next trip to Philly and check this out, but my wife is convinced (probably correctly) that I won't be able to keep a straight face and will start laughing at an inappropriate time.

Some of the promotional material on their web site is unintentionally hilarious:

A life-sized Noah's Ark experience.
Come and be amazed.

From the moment you turn the corner and the towering Ark comes into view, to the friendly animals in the zoo, to the jaw-dropping exhibits inside the Ark, you’ll experience the pages of the Bible like never before.

I wonder if they have a diorama of Noah's daughter's getting him drunk and having sex with him?

That was Lot, not Noah.

Noah got drunk and passed out naked. His son Ham saw him naked and told his two brothers. When Noah sobered up, he cursed Ham's son (his grandson), and a whole bunch of my Southern in-laws used to tell me that justified making black people slaves.

I kid you not.

Bah I hate it when I get stuff wrong like that- yes you are of course correct.

 

[Vandalshandle]

As I recall, god turned Lot's wife to a pillar of salt because she supported for Hillary Clinton for Head Priestess..

 

[bendog]

As I recall, god turned Lot's wife to a pillar of salt because she supported for Hillary Clinton for Head Priestess..

It's even funnier than that. God promised Abraham that he wouldn't destroy Sodom and Gomorrah if ten just men were found. Apparently, they weren't. Lot, his wife, his two daughters and the two men whom the daughters were to marry were in Sodom, when two angels arrived with orders to destroy the towns. Lot got the angels into his house before the town folk could man rape them. The townfolk surrounded the house and were going to break in and get the man angels.

But Lot offers up his virginal daughter for girl rape! Fortunately for them, the angels intervene and strike the entire city blind. The angels tell Lot to run to the mountains. But the future sons in law don't believe and stay, and perish. Lot meanwhile says the mountains are not for him, and asks the angels to spare the little city Zoar. The angels say OK.

On the way out of town, Lot's wife looks back ... and that's the part we all remember. But, Lot and the daughters go onto Zoar, but Lot doesn't like it there. So they move to the mountains ... where there are no men to impregnate the daughters and continue the tribe. So they get Lot drunk and "steal his seed."

The moral of the story is that it's ok to offer up your daughters for rape to protect angels, and if necessary you can impregnate them without offending God.

 

[Vandalshandle]

As I recall, god turned Lot's wife to a pillar of salt because she supported for Hillary Clinton for Head Priestess..

It's even funnier than that. God promised Abraham that he wouldn't destroy Sodom and Gomorrah if ten just men were found. Apparently, they weren't. Lot, his wife, his two daughters and the two men whom the daughters were to marry were in Sodom, when two angels arrived with orders to destroy the towns. Lot got the angels into his house before the town folk could man rape them. The townfolk surrounded the house and were going to break in and get the man angels.

But Lot offers up his virginal daughter for girl rape! Fortunately for them, the angels intervene and strike the entire city blind. The angels tell Lot to run to the mountains. But the future sons in law don't believe and stay, and perish. Lot meanwhile says the mountains are not for him, and asks the angels to spare the little city Zoar. The angels say OK.

On the way out of town, Lot's wife looks back ... and that's the part we all remember. But, Lot and the daughters go onto Zoar, but Lot doesn't like it there. So they move to the mountains ... where there are no men to impregnate the daughters and continue the tribe. So they get Lot drunk and "steal his seed."

The moral of the story is that it's ok to offer up your daughters for rape to protect angels, and if necessary you can impregnate them without offending God.

Well, I know that this is the story that appears in the Bible, but frankly, I got lost back when Lot didn't want to go to the mountains.

I am, however, concerned about another aspect of all this. Why isn't the Bible X-rated? I mean, come on, I don't want my grandkids reading stuff like this....