Puffed Up Exploding Toads... I Have A Use For them!

[Eightball]

http://news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&u=/ap/20050430/ap_on_sc/germany_exploding_toads_10 This is not a catastrophe! It's a boon to eco-friendly sportsmen!

BERLIN (AP) - More than 1,000 toads have puffed up and exploded in a Hamburg pond in recent weeks, and scientists still have no explanation for what's causing the combustion, an official said Wednesday.

Both the pond's water and body parts of the toads have been tested, but scientists have been unable to find a bacteria or virus that would cause the toads to swell up and pop, said Janne Kloepper, of the Hamburg-based Institute for Hygiene and the Environment.

``It's absolutely strange,'' she said. ``We have a really unique story here in Hamburg. This phenomenon really doesn't seem to have appeared anywhere before.''

The toads at a pond in the upscale neighborhood of Altona have been blowing up since the beginning of the month, filling up like balloons until their stomachs suddenly burst.

``It looks like a scene from a science-fiction movie,'' Werner Schmolnik, the head of a local environment group, told the Hamburger Abendblatt daily. ``The bloated animals suffer for several minutes before they finally die.''

Biologists have come up with several theories, but Kloepper said that most have been ruled out.

The pond's water quality is no better or worse than other bodies of water in Hamburg, the toads did not appear to have a disease, and a laboratory in Berlin has ruled out the possibility that it is a fungus that made its way from South America, she said.

She said that tests will continue. In the meantime, city residents have been warned to stay away from the pond.

I'd say that we've come upon a new organic fishing bobber.

Grab yourself a bloated toad, cast away. No more of those plastic, red and white bobbers. Plastic is environmentally unfriendly, as we must use more precious crude oil to make plastic bobbers.

I say, we bottle these toad carcasses, and offer them to the environmentally sensitive fishermen/sportsment, as an eco-sensitive alternative.

Bottle directions:

Remove Toad Bobber, loop fishing line around, organic bobber's head(not to tightly as head will be severed, and floatation gasses will escape-rendering your new organic bobber ineffective), and cast away, knowing that you are helping the environment. Also new organic bobber, has the added effect of attracting fish in a similiar fashion to "chumming" which we all know is illegal in most states.
http://news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&u=/ap/20050430/ap_on_sc/germany_exploding_toads_10 This is not a catastrophe! It's a boon to eco-friendly sportsmen!

 

[musicman]

LOL! How the hell am I going to ignore a thread with a title like this?

What a great name for a punk band!

 

[Merlin1047]

Ummmm - I'm afraid that there may be an influx of homosexuals seeking to utilize the toads for purposes other than fishing.

You may recall that some time ago the homosexual community suffered a number of embarrASSing incidents involving gerbils which had been anally inserted. Well, the toad could solve the problem. They could stick that rascal up their butts first, then insert the gerbil. If the gerbil refuses to come out, the toad would eventually explode, thereby solving two problems at once.

Yeah. I know I'm disgusting.