On Line Dating

[Sonny Clark]

Such as what?

As to your post I quoted of course. You said you heard "the same stories" and that you agree. What stories are these that are so horrible that they equate to child molestation?

I never said anything about child molestation. You obviously have me confused with someone else.

Well, if you read the quoted post, Bonzi said "unfortunately many people use their looks to take advantage of people, or to get other things (like favors, money, merchandise etc.) - and it's not exclusive to females. To me those people are the lowest life forms (other than child molesters)." You agreed with these statements and said as much. You also said that you knew of some stories. This is what I'm referring to.

Yes, I have heard many stories where a very nice looking man or woman has used their looks to get money, homes, cars, vacations, jewelry, etc.. It's not uncommon. It happens, it's real , and both men and women know how to use looks to attract the opposite sex. And, in some cases, they take unfair advantage of the looks they've been blessed with.

How do they take unfair advantage is what I'm interested in. Are you saying that because a person is good-looking, they FORCE another person to do nice things for them? Or is it that the other person has a crush or whatever and would do these things even if the attractive looking person came right out and said that she (or he) was not interested? Do you realize that gift buying, etc., is a part of the "wooing" process? Yes, some men actually like to buy a woman they find attractive gifts and things. So, if you could clarify and perhaps give an example of what you are referring to, that would be great.

Think of it as a con, a scam, taking unfair advantage of someone due to the fact that you were blessed with above average looks. The examples are many, just as they are played out in many movies. A nice looking woman using her looks to get money, jewelry, cars, homes, etc.. Men and women do it, it's common. Yes, I've had people tell me their stories of how they were used.

 

[Bonzi]

So, men deserve to be taken advantage of - since they should know better.
True of women also.

Men are too stupid to know better and they wouldn't care anyways..

Not true. I have heard many a man (young and old) gripe about a woman taking advantage of them, by leading them on... of course, that's perceived and only one side of the story, granted....

 

[Judicial review]

As to your post I quoted of course. You said you heard "the same stories" and that you agree. What stories are these that are so horrible that they equate to child molestation?

I never said anything about child molestation. You obviously have me confused with someone else.

Well, if you read the quoted post, Bonzi said "unfortunately many people use their looks to take advantage of people, or to get other things (like favors, money, merchandise etc.) - and it's not exclusive to females. To me those people are the lowest life forms (other than child molesters)." You agreed with these statements and said as much. You also said that you knew of some stories. This is what I'm referring to.

Yes, I have heard many stories where a very nice looking man or woman has used their looks to get money, homes, cars, vacations, jewelry, etc.. It's not uncommon. It happens, it's real , and both men and women know how to use looks to attract the opposite sex. And, in some cases, they take unfair advantage of the looks they've been blessed with.

How do they take unfair advantage is what I'm interested in. Are you saying that because a person is good-looking, they FORCE another person to do nice things for them? Or is it that the other person has a crush or whatever and would do these things even if the attractive looking person came right out and said that she (or he) was not interested? Do you realize that gift buying, etc., is a part of the "wooing" process? Yes, some men actually like to buy a woman they find attractive gifts and things. So, if you could clarify and perhaps give an example of what you are referring to, that would be great.

Think of it as a con, a scam, taking unfair advantage of someone due to the fact that you were blessed with above average looks. The examples are many, just as they are played out in many movies. A nice looking woman using her looks to get money, jewelry, cars, homes, etc.. Men and women do it, it's common. Yes, I've had people tell me their stories of how they were used.

What ever happened to the meaning of a gift? Oh if you are insecure you will be used. Period. Nobody uses me unless I approve

 

[Sonny Clark]

I think what Sonny Clark is referring to is women that date men, with no interest in them romantically etc. but, only for the monetary side of what they have to offer....

There is nothing wrong with any of this, unless you are USING the person and taking advantage of them. If you are genuinely interested, then lose interest later on, that's just unfortunate.

Well, most men I think are fully aware of when they are being used and don't mind. In a lot of these cases, these men would never be able to attain such women without the money. It doesn't necessarily mean that they are nice guys that are being used. A lot of these guys know the deal and, to be honest, I'm sure that many o them are not such very nice people themselves.

We're all different and have different concepts of dating, relationships, right, wrong etc.

Being wooed and having money spent on me never did anything for me personally (but there is NOTHING WRONG with this... most women enjoy it) - so it's hard for me to comment. In a dating experience, the person and whether they are attractive to me, interesting and fun to be with is pretty much all that matters (but that's just me... I don't judge others that feel differently) - we could sit on a park bench eating $1 McDonald's ice cream cones, and, would prefer that with a man that totally engaged me vs. a rich guy that would take me out in a Limo to the most expensive restaurant, who I thought was not interesting etc.

I agree 100%. However, when you are looking for a relationship, a man who has his financial situation at least stabilized is a good thing. Let's not forget either that I am an "older woman" at 37, so the things I'm looking for are going to be a little different than a person who is in her 20s. I certainly don't think there is anything wrong with a woman my age looking for a man with financial stability and even a little more. Of course, I would have to like the person too though! Maybe I expect too much?

A typical woman, plain and simple.

 

[Judicial review]

I think what Sonny Clark is referring to is women that date men, with no interest in them romantically etc. but, only for the monetary side of what they have to offer....

There is nothing wrong with any of this, unless you are USING the person and taking advantage of them. If you are genuinely interested, then lose interest later on, that's just unfortunate.

Well, most men I think are fully aware of when they are being used and don't mind. In a lot of these cases, these men would never be able to attain such women without the money. It doesn't necessarily mean that they are nice guys that are being used. A lot of these guys know the deal and, to be honest, I'm sure that many o them are not such very nice people themselves.

We're all different and have different concepts of dating, relationships, right, wrong etc.

Being wooed and having money spent on me never did anything for me personally (but there is NOTHING WRONG with this... most women enjoy it) - so it's hard for me to comment. In a dating experience, the person and whether they are attractive to me, interesting and fun to be with is pretty much all that matters (but that's just me... I don't judge others that feel differently) - we could sit on a park bench eating $1 McDonald's ice cream cones, and, would prefer that with a man that totally engaged me vs. a rich guy that would take me out in a Limo to the most expensive restaurant, who I thought was not interesting etc.

I agree 100%. However, when you are looking for a relationship, a man who has his financial situation at least stabilized is a good thing. Let's not forget either that I am an "older woman" at 37, so the things I'm looking for are going to be a little different than a person who is in her 20s. I certainly don't think there is anything wrong with a woman my age looking for a man with financial stability and even a little more. Of course, I would have to like the person too though! Maybe I expect too much?

A typical woman, plain and simple.

The typical man is lost in today's society

 

[Bonzi]

Bottom line: Don't waste someone else's time if are not really interested.

NOTE: (my opinion, we all have to make choices and live with them)

 

[Sonny Clark]

I think what Sonny Clark is referring to is women that date men, with no interest in them romantically etc. but, only for the monetary side of what they have to offer....

There is nothing wrong with any of this, unless you are USING the person and taking advantage of them. If you are genuinely interested, then lose interest later on, that's just unfortunate.

Well, most men I think are fully aware of when they are being used and don't mind. In a lot of these cases, these men would never be able to attain such women without the money. It doesn't necessarily mean that they are nice guys that are being used. A lot of these guys know the deal and, to be honest, I'm sure that many o them are not such very nice people themselves.

We're all different and have different concepts of dating, relationships, right, wrong etc.

Being wooed and having money spent on me never did anything for me personally (but there is NOTHING WRONG with this... most women enjoy it) - so it's hard for me to comment. In a dating experience, the person and whether they are attractive to me, interesting and fun to be with is pretty much all that matters (but that's just me... I don't judge others that feel differently) - we could sit on a park bench eating $1 McDonald's ice cream cones, and, would prefer that with a man that totally engaged me vs. a rich guy that would take me out in a Limo to the most expensive restaurant, who I thought was not interesting etc.

I agree 100%. However, when you are looking for a relationship, a man who has his financial situation at least stabilized is a good thing. Let's not forget either that I am an "older woman" at 37, so the things I'm looking for are going to be a little different than a person who is in her 20s. I certainly don't think there is anything wrong with a woman my age looking for a man with financial stability and even a little more. Of course, I would have to like the person too though! Maybe I expect too much?

A typical woman, plain and simple.

The typical man is lost in today's society

In my opinion, 99% of people are lost.

 

[ChrisL]

As to your post I quoted of course. You said you heard "the same stories" and that you agree. What stories are these that are so horrible that they equate to child molestation?

I never said anything about child molestation. You obviously have me confused with someone else.

Well, if you read the quoted post, Bonzi said "unfortunately many people use their looks to take advantage of people, or to get other things (like favors, money, merchandise etc.) - and it's not exclusive to females. To me those people are the lowest life forms (other than child molesters)." You agreed with these statements and said as much. You also said that you knew of some stories. This is what I'm referring to.

Yes, I have heard many stories where a very nice looking man or woman has used their looks to get money, homes, cars, vacations, jewelry, etc.. It's not uncommon. It happens, it's real , and both men and women know how to use looks to attract the opposite sex. And, in some cases, they take unfair advantage of the looks they've been blessed with.

How do they take unfair advantage is what I'm interested in. Are you saying that because a person is good-looking, they FORCE another person to do nice things for them? Or is it that the other person has a crush or whatever and would do these things even if the attractive looking person came right out and said that she (or he) was not interested? Do you realize that gift buying, etc., is a part of the "wooing" process? Yes, some men actually like to buy a woman they find attractive gifts and things. So, if you could clarify and perhaps give an example of what you are referring to, that would be great.

Think of it as a con, a scam, taking unfair advantage of someone due to the fact that you were blessed with above average looks. The examples are many, just as they are played out in many movies. A nice looking woman using her looks to get money, jewelry, cars, homes, etc.. Men and women do it, it's common. Yes, I've had people tell me their stories of how they were used.

And why do you think these people are taking advantage? Aren't the people who buy them things accountable for their own actions? Do you think you can be hypnotized by good looks or something? You know, more often than not, these people buy the other people things with the hopes of getting something that THEY want too! I don't see how one is any better than the other in such a situation, unless we are talking about actual real con games. However, a lot of men will buy women things to try to get something from the woman, and then when they don't end up getting what they wanted, they are bitter and angry about and will claim "she used me!!" which I find rather ironic.

 

[Bonzi]

Women have the right to look for the "whole package"......

It's not bad to want financial security......

Again,we all have different needs/desires. But it's always helpful to be up front about it..

 

[ChrisL]

I think what Sonny Clark is referring to is women that date men, with no interest in them romantically etc. but, only for the monetary side of what they have to offer....

There is nothing wrong with any of this, unless you are USING the person and taking advantage of them. If you are genuinely interested, then lose interest later on, that's just unfortunate.

Well, most men I think are fully aware of when they are being used and don't mind. In a lot of these cases, these men would never be able to attain such women without the money. It doesn't necessarily mean that they are nice guys that are being used. A lot of these guys know the deal and, to be honest, I'm sure that many o them are not such very nice people themselves.

We're all different and have different concepts of dating, relationships, right, wrong etc.

Being wooed and having money spent on me never did anything for me personally (but there is NOTHING WRONG with this... most women enjoy it) - so it's hard for me to comment. In a dating experience, the person and whether they are attractive to me, interesting and fun to be with is pretty much all that matters (but that's just me... I don't judge others that feel differently) - we could sit on a park bench eating $1 McDonald's ice cream cones, and, would prefer that with a man that totally engaged me vs. a rich guy that would take me out in a Limo to the most expensive restaurant, who I thought was not interesting etc.

I agree 100%. However, when you are looking for a relationship, a man who has his financial situation at least stabilized is a good thing. Let's not forget either that I am an "older woman" at 37, so the things I'm looking for are going to be a little different than a person who is in her 20s. I certainly don't think there is anything wrong with a woman my age looking for a man with financial stability and even a little more. Of course, I would have to like the person too though! Maybe I expect too much?

A typical woman, plain and simple.

What's that supposed to mean? Do you think a woman of my age should date a man who, say, lives with his parents still? Sorry, that some of us have standards.

 

[Sonny Clark]

I never said anything about child molestation. You obviously have me confused with someone else.

Well, if you read the quoted post, Bonzi said "unfortunately many people use their looks to take advantage of people, or to get other things (like favors, money, merchandise etc.) - and it's not exclusive to females. To me those people are the lowest life forms (other than child molesters)." You agreed with these statements and said as much. You also said that you knew of some stories. This is what I'm referring to.

Yes, I have heard many stories where a very nice looking man or woman has used their looks to get money, homes, cars, vacations, jewelry, etc.. It's not uncommon. It happens, it's real , and both men and women know how to use looks to attract the opposite sex. And, in some cases, they take unfair advantage of the looks they've been blessed with.

How do they take unfair advantage is what I'm interested in. Are you saying that because a person is good-looking, they FORCE another person to do nice things for them? Or is it that the other person has a crush or whatever and would do these things even if the attractive looking person came right out and said that she (or he) was not interested? Do you realize that gift buying, etc., is a part of the "wooing" process? Yes, some men actually like to buy a woman they find attractive gifts and things. So, if you could clarify and perhaps give an example of what you are referring to, that would be great.

Think of it as a con, a scam, taking unfair advantage of someone due to the fact that you were blessed with above average looks. The examples are many, just as they are played out in many movies. A nice looking woman using her looks to get money, jewelry, cars, homes, etc.. Men and women do it, it's common. Yes, I've had people tell me their stories of how they were used.

And why do you think these people are taking advantage? Aren't the people who buy them things accountable for their own actions? Do you think you can be hypnotized by good looks or something? You know, more often than not, these people buy the other people things with the hopes of getting something that THEY want too! I don't see how one is any better than the other in such a situation, unless we are talking about actual real con games. However, a lot of men will buy women things to try to get something from the woman, and then when they don't end up getting what they wanted, they are bitter and angry about and will claim "she used me!!" which I find rather ironic.

People use each other, been that way since the beginning of time, and will continue until time runs out. People are users, in one way or another. Men use women, and women use men, just a cold hard fact.

 

[Judicial review]

Bottom line: Don't waste someone else's time if are not really interested.

NOTE: (my opinion, we all have to make choices and live with them)

Yup. Women live with the baby and men pay up. Great society to be a child support attorney.

 

[Bonzi]

And why do you think these people are taking advantage? Aren't the people who buy them things accountable for their own actions? Do you think you can be hypnotized by good looks or something? You know, more often than not, these people buy the other people things with the hopes of getting something that THEY want too! I don't see how one is any better than the other in such a situation, unless we are talking about actual real con games. However, a lot of men will buy women things to try to get something from the woman, and then when they don't end up getting what they wanted, they are bitter and angry about and will claim "she used me!!" which I find rather ironic.

.
... that does happen, like I said, there are no absolutes...

 

[Bonzi]

In my opinion, 99% of people are lost.

Not sure about that (unless you mean spiritually) -

Most people are just not willing to be honest with themselves with others....

 

[Judicial review]

I think what Sonny Clark is referring to is women that date men, with no interest in them romantically etc. but, only for the monetary side of what they have to offer....

There is nothing wrong with any of this, unless you are USING the person and taking advantage of them. If you are genuinely interested, then lose interest later on, that's just unfortunate.

Well, most men I think are fully aware of when they are being used and don't mind. In a lot of these cases, these men would never be able to attain such women without the money. It doesn't necessarily mean that they are nice guys that are being used. A lot of these guys know the deal and, to be honest, I'm sure that many o them are not such very nice people themselves.

We're all different and have different concepts of dating, relationships, right, wrong etc.

Being wooed and having money spent on me never did anything for me personally (but there is NOTHING WRONG with this... most women enjoy it) - so it's hard for me to comment. In a dating experience, the person and whether they are attractive to me, interesting and fun to be with is pretty much all that matters (but that's just me... I don't judge others that feel differently) - we could sit on a park bench eating $1 McDonald's ice cream cones, and, would prefer that with a man that totally engaged me vs. a rich guy that would take me out in a Limo to the most expensive restaurant, who I thought was not interesting etc.

I agree 100%. However, when you are looking for a relationship, a man who has his financial situation at least stabilized is a good thing. Let's not forget either that I am an "older woman" at 37, so the things I'm looking for are going to be a little different than a person who is in her 20s. I certainly don't think there is anything wrong with a woman my age looking for a man with financial stability and even a little more. Of course, I would have to like the person too though! Maybe I expect too much?

A typical woman, plain and simple.

What's that supposed to mean? Do you think a woman of my age should date a man who, say, lives with his parents still? Sorry, that some of us have standards.

Lol.. Those are basic standards. Maybe he's living with parents and is pissed.

 

[Judicial review]

In my opinion, 99% of people are lost.

Not sure about that (unless you mean spiritually) -

Most people are just not willing to be honest with themselves with others....

Did you just totally forget my post on insecurities?!?!?

 

[ChrisL]

And why do you think these people are taking advantage? Aren't the people who buy them things accountable for their own actions? Do you think you can be hypnotized by good looks or something? You know, more often than not, these people buy the other people things with the hopes of getting something that THEY want too! I don't see how one is any better than the other in such a situation, unless we are talking about actual real con games. However, a lot of men will buy women things to try to get something from the woman, and then when they don't end up getting what they wanted, they are bitter and angry about and will claim "she used me!!" which I find rather ironic.

.
... that does happen, like I said, there are no absolutes...

I think that we can admit in most instances, the man is buying the woman items or whatever to get into her pants. He has his OWN motives. She has hers. I don't see one being any worse than the other. Now, if the guy is professing his love for her? Then it would be appropriate for her to tell him how she really feels and if she doesn't have feelings for him, to state that and not accept any gifts, etc.

Let's be honest, men are visual creatures and they are attracted to good looking women. That is just a fact of life.

 

[Sonny Clark]

I think what Sonny Clark is referring to is women that date men, with no interest in them romantically etc. but, only for the monetary side of what they have to offer....

There is nothing wrong with any of this, unless you are USING the person and taking advantage of them. If you are genuinely interested, then lose interest later on, that's just unfortunate.

Well, most men I think are fully aware of when they are being used and don't mind. In a lot of these cases, these men would never be able to attain such women without the money. It doesn't necessarily mean that they are nice guys that are being used. A lot of these guys know the deal and, to be honest, I'm sure that many o them are not such very nice people themselves.

We're all different and have different concepts of dating, relationships, right, wrong etc.

Being wooed and having money spent on me never did anything for me personally (but there is NOTHING WRONG with this... most women enjoy it) - so it's hard for me to comment. In a dating experience, the person and whether they are attractive to me, interesting and fun to be with is pretty much all that matters (but that's just me... I don't judge others that feel differently) - we could sit on a park bench eating $1 McDonald's ice cream cones, and, would prefer that with a man that totally engaged me vs. a rich guy that would take me out in a Limo to the most expensive restaurant, who I thought was not interesting etc.

I agree 100%. However, when you are looking for a relationship, a man who has his financial situation at least stabilized is a good thing. Let's not forget either that I am an "older woman" at 37, so the things I'm looking for are going to be a little different than a person who is in her 20s. I certainly don't think there is anything wrong with a woman my age looking for a man with financial stability and even a little more. Of course, I would have to like the person too though! Maybe I expect too much?

A typical woman, plain and simple.

What's that supposed to mean? Do you think a woman of my age should date a man who, say, lives with his parents still? Sorry, that some of us have standards.

What it means is exactly what I said. Most women, yes, most, place financial security ( money ) above all else, a fact. I have heard many women say, "I married for love the first time, I'm marrying for money the next time." I have heard many women say, "I wouldn't marry a man unless he had money." I've heard it all over the years. Yes, some women do look for love, friendship, companion ship, compatibility, personality, etc., but, as a rule, women want the MONEY.

 

[Bonzi]

Did you just totally forget my post on insecurities?!?!?

Nope, I remember... why? Is that somehow tied to being honest with yourself or with others? Too insecure to be yourself ... so you try to be something/someone else? Make compromises... etc.

 

[Judicial review]

Well, most men I think are fully aware of when they are being used and don't mind. In a lot of these cases, these men would never be able to attain such women without the money. It doesn't necessarily mean that they are nice guys that are being used. A lot of these guys know the deal and, to be honest, I'm sure that many o them are not such very nice people themselves.

We're all different and have different concepts of dating, relationships, right, wrong etc.

Being wooed and having money spent on me never did anything for me personally (but there is NOTHING WRONG with this... most women enjoy it) - so it's hard for me to comment. In a dating experience, the person and whether they are attractive to me, interesting and fun to be with is pretty much all that matters (but that's just me... I don't judge others that feel differently) - we could sit on a park bench eating $1 McDonald's ice cream cones, and, would prefer that with a man that totally engaged me vs. a rich guy that would take me out in a Limo to the most expensive restaurant, who I thought was not interesting etc.

I agree 100%. However, when you are looking for a relationship, a man who has his financial situation at least stabilized is a good thing. Let's not forget either that I am an "older woman" at 37, so the things I'm looking for are going to be a little different than a person who is in her 20s. I certainly don't think there is anything wrong with a woman my age looking for a man with financial stability and even a little more. Of course, I would have to like the person too though! Maybe I expect too much?

A typical woman, plain and simple.

The typical man is lost in today's society

In my opinion, 99% of people are lost.

We are talking about men and their role in society. Quit generalizing it.