Men & Marriage

[Adam's Apple]

Married and Loving It
By Melissa Fletcher Stoeltje, San Antonio Express News
March 20, 2006

Journalist Neil Chethik was sick of the stereotypes -- the ones that say men are louts who don't value their marriages, who operate as psychological juveniles next to women who do all the emotional heavy lifting in the relationship.

In his research, based on a random telephone survey of 288 husbands and 70 face-to-face interviews, author Neil Chethik found that the majority of husbands like being married and wanted to stay that way. Ninety percent of men surveyed said yes when asked, "Would you marry the same woman again?"

Married for 19 years, he knew something was amiss. So he started asking men about their marriages. In in-depth interviews with 70 husbands across the country, he asked the deep questions: Are you happy in marriage? How do you show affection to your wife? Based on a random telephone survey of 288 male spouses and the 70 face-to-face interviews, Chethik found a picture far different from the public image of husbands as beer-swilling Neanderthals.

for full article:
http://www.indystar.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20060320/LIVING/603200309/1007

 

[Nuc]

The stereotypes are perpetuated by the advertising media. Men are depicted as idiots. This is because they sell most of their crap to women, who are amused by this bashing. And men are too passive to notice or care. I boycott the products of advertisers who use this strategy.

 

[dilloduck]

The stereotypes are perpetuated by the advertising media. Men are depicted as idiots. This is because they sell most of their crap to women, who are amused by this bashing. And men are too passive to notice or care. I boycott the products of advertisers who use this strategy.

Considering the fact that marriage goes so contrary to how men are "built", I think men have adapted quite well.

 

[Nuc]

Considering the fact that marriage goes so contrary to how men are "built", I think men have adapted quite well.

I was referring more to the Neandertal stereotypes than the fact we are hard wired to want numerous sex partners. That's reality!

 

[Shattered]

Typically, I think the people creating the stereotypes for married men and/or women are unmarried themselves.

There are *some* men that fall in to the beer-swilling, glazed look in their eyes, can't see anything but the TV when sports are on, but those are pretty far and few between.. And they value their marriages...just value it more when the games over, and their team won.

 

[dilloduck]

I was referring more to the Neandertal stereotypes than the fact we are hard wired to want numerous sex partners. That's reality!

I wasn't--I was referring to married men in general. I didn't see anything about neanderthals in the article but whatever floats your boat !

 

[Nienna]

NOT a good day for me to talk about "marriage."

 

[rtwngAvngr]

NOT a good day for me to talk about "marriage."

Trouble in paradise, MOM?

 

[dilloduck]

Trouble in paradise, MOM?

It's all your fault, dude !
You made her swoon!

 

[Joz]

http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/pto-3705.html


.......... "We want a step-by-step guide on how to be emotionally intimate with your woman."

Therein lies a precis of the principal dilemma in marriage today. Men have come to accept -- even celebrate -- their wives' careers and paychecks while learning, step-by-step, how to bathe the baby and baste the turkey. But there is no Julia Child's style primer on closeness, no chart with diagrams: Insert A into slot B, and there you go. Intimacy achieved. Let's go have a cold one.

It would be funny if it weren't so painful. "It's probably the real cause of half of all divorces," according to Sam Margulies, a divorce mediator in Greensboro, North Carolina, and author of several books on the subject of marital breakups. The changes in women's lives -- their roles, ambitions, opportunities -- have been considered from every angle. But men's lives have changed too, in ways that are more confusing, more contradictory and often less welcome. Men did not ask to have their roles redefined. Now, they're looking for an instruction manual complete with fine print -- and a translator's guide as well................

 

[dilloduck]

http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/pto-3705.html


.......... "We want a step-by-step guide on how to be emotionally intimate with your woman."

Therein lies a precis of the principal dilemma in marriage today. Men have come to accept -- even celebrate -- their wives' careers and paychecks while learning, step-by-step, how to bathe the baby and baste the turkey. But there is no Julia Child's style primer on closeness, no chart with diagrams: Insert A into slot B, and there you go. Intimacy achieved. Let's go have a cold one.

It would be funny if it weren't so painful. "It's probably the real cause of half of all divorces," according to Sam Margulies, a divorce mediator in Greensboro, North Carolina, and author of several books on the subject of marital breakups. The changes in women's lives -- their roles, ambitions, opportunities -- have been considered from every angle. But men's lives have changed too, in ways that are more confusing, more contradictory and often less welcome. Men did not ask to have their roles redefined. Now, they're looking for an instruction manual complete with fine print -- and a translator's guide as well................

Who said we males wanted a step-by-step guide ?

 

[Abbey Normal]

The stereotypes are perpetuated by the advertising media. Men are depicted as idiots. This is because they sell most of their crap to women, who are amused by this bashing. And men are too passive to notice or care. I boycott the products of advertisers who use this strategy.

You may be generally right, but I am not amused by these depictions, and have so stated on here more than once. Interestingly, it was some of the men here who took me to task for criticizing shows that depict married men/fathers as laughable morons.

Good for you boycotting them. :clap1:

 

[Nienna]

Trouble in paradise, MOM?

Paradise? Isn't that a town in Michigan?

 

[Nuc]

You may be generally right, but I am not amused by these depictions, and have so stated on here more than once. Interestingly, it was some of the men here who took me to task for criticizing shows that depict married men/fathers as laughable morons.

Good for you boycotting them. :clap1:

Thanks, I boycott all products that piss me off one way or another.

On the other hand have you noticed how on TV there are an abundance of disgusting fat slobs married to foxy babes? Somehow that must appeal to the male viewers while evidently not alienating the females.

 

[Abbey Normal]

Thanks, I boycott all products that piss me off one way or another.

On the other hand have you noticed how on TV there are an abundance of disgusting fat slobs married to foxy babes? Somehow that must appeal to the male viewers while evidently not alienating the females.

Yeah, that is the essence of most beer and car commercials. Buy *this*, and the babes you could never hope to get will suddenly find you irresistable.
I guess it does sometimes happen with the right car, though.