Lesbianism vs Homosexuality

Having gays and straights in our family we just recently got together. Straights sounds kinda funny. But the interesting aspect is whichever side you are on the concerns values and interests are normal and relatively the same. I have a problem as sometimes my wife of more years than most of you have lived notices. Today she just laughs or ignores my wandering eyes. An attractive woman never grows old in these old eyes.
 
Over the years I think I have come to understand that homosexuality is the male sex drive being directed to other males, rather than to females as God, biology, and logic would dictate. Not for me, but it seems apparent that for some tiny fraction of the male population, that's the way they are wired.

Lesbianism is something altogether different, and it is a puzzling thing indeed.

I recently watched a YouTube video (showed up on my feed for some reason) of a woman describing her realization that she was a lesbian. On a couple occasions she states that, "I was dating men and falling in love with women."

This does not compute, at least to me. "Falling in love" for men includes a large portion of sexual attraction in addition to emotional attachment. Sexual attraction, like it or not, is an inherent desire to copulate and make babies with the object of the attraction. Even for homosexuals, much of the attraction is the desire to "copulate" (oral and/or anal) with the object of attraction.

But for lesbians, what does it mean to "fall in love"? Surely there is emotional attraction, but what else? Is there a desire to - I don't even know what - that is part of the package of "falling in love"? Or do they add that because society expects it?

Stories of married women, usually with adult or nearly-adult children suddenly coming out as lesbians - suddenly "realizing' that they are lesbians.

What the ****? Anyone out there have any insights?
The best people are only conccerned with their own sexual orientation , not that of others. Whatever sexual orientation people have , it's the one that works for them. Most of the time , there are many people who feel obligated to enter heterosexual relationships and have children. Unfortunately it doesn't usually bode well for everyone involved. On a dating site right now I see so many men who were married to women who are seeking relationships with men now. They only fooled themselves. People need to be what I hey really are or face the consequences later on in life.
 
My thoughts are its nobodys business what others do within the laws. Homosexuality is a nothing burger.
 
Nobody understands lesbianism. It is one of those mysteries that will forever remain unsolved.
 
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