I'm actually considering marriage

[Blaster]

I am just considering marriage and it's not a done deal. I am aware of the pros and cons.

 

[iku]

After a couple months of dating a wonderful woman I am finally considering marriage. I've sowed my wild oats and at 34 I think it may be time to settle down and raise a family. She and I share many common interests and both of us have good careers. I am finally going to meet her parents as we are invited for dinner at their home. I hope to make a good impression.

Be single. Mingle.

 

[iku]

You just want someone to make your sandwiches.

cucumber sandwiches are my favorite. Poached eggs as well.
Best to be single and make it yourself. Make it perfect every time

 

[iamwhatiseem]

I am just considering marriage and it's not a done deal. I am aware of the pros and cons.

Well, let's be honest friend, you are only aware of the pros and cons. You don't really know them because you haven't lived it yet. And I am not saying that to be an ass, or condescending in any way.
Take it or leave it... advice from a 59 year old dude...
The best thing you can do is get married with your eyes wide open - BOTH OF YOU - that the odds are seriously stacked against you making it. And the only way you will make it is being aware that you WILL fail if you don't approach it this way.
And don't believe the bullshit line - marriage is two people becoming one... that is garbage. It is not.
In reality, you are introducing a THIRD entity in... the relationship. It is it's own thing, and it is needy. It has high demands, ignore it - and it will walk away, and you will have it no more.

Good luck... I hope you are one of the few that makes it, and doesn't ruin two lives in the process. And don't think that isn't profoundly possible.

 

[deannalw]

I am just considering marriage and it's not a done deal. I am aware of the pros and cons.

Don't let these naysayers pop your bubble.You seem like a man that knows his own mind. Marriage is good and bad and it's what you make of it.

James said he loved me 2 months in. We married within 6 months. We're happier with one another now, after 41 years than we were before. It doesn't always go like that, but sometimes it does.

 

[deannalw]

I do plan on greeting her mother with flowers. Thanks for the advice.

Sometimes... it's the in-laws that cause the most friction in a marriage.

 

[deannalw]

How much do you make? Assume when she has a kid she may never work again or stop until the kids in high school. That’s 14 years you paying for 3 people.

What I would do is ask her to get married but only after she’s debt free and you have

a. A home
b. $100k in the bank

Then we can have ONE kid.

You're very romantic

 

[crossbody]

Obey God, get married

 

[whitehall]

Welcome to the real world. Next thing you will probably vote republican.

 

[EvilCat Breath]

After a couple of months!

 

[sparky]

mixing with unsavoury characters

~S~

 

[candycorn]

Don't know. I'm not his daddy, but 2 months in? He doesn't even know her yet. He'll one could be married 20 years, and still not know their spouse. Like my brothers lawyer said, "you don't fully know your wife, until your across the table from her in a divorce court".

Point being any legally binding contract should be run through your legal counsel, and one should certainly educate themselves with the divorce laws, and family court system of their state before even considering marriage.

And yesterday he was asking an obscure internet message board what physical attributes are most important in a woman.

do with that what you will.

 

[RetiredGySgt]

I am just considering marriage and it's not a done deal. I am aware of the pros and cons.

don't listen to the whiners, make the decision from your heart and mind not because some nobody on the internet is afraid of marriage.

 

[Blaster]

don't listen to the whiners, make the decision from your heart and mind not because some nobody on the internet is afraid of marriage.

I am a good judge of character and she has an abundance of it. Thanks for the support.

 

[expat500]

cucumber sandwiches are my favorite. Poached eggs as well

Well that’s good to know. I had one for lunch.

 

[expat500]

You're very romantic

As if.

 

[RetiredGySgt]

Marriages fail because the two dont work at and in most cases went into eying an exit strategy. they are hard and require work I have been married 41 years.

 

[Blaster]

We are planning a trip to Italy later this year.

 

[expat500]

We are planning a trip to Italy later this year.

Why not Paris?

 

[Synthaholic]

I have been a bachelor for a long time and have dated many women but this gal has a certain quality about her that is almost irresistible.

If you're 34 you haven't been a bachelor for a long time.