Golf jokes, anyone?

[Woodznutz]

As a golfer kept losing balls in water hazards and deep roughs, his partner advised him to use an old ball when facing such difficult shots. He replied, "I never had an old ball."

 

[Mr Natural]

A nice walk ruined by a stupid game.

 

[Woodznutz]

Golf.
"A game whose purpose is to place a small ball into a distant hole using implements totally unsuited to the task."

 

[lg325]

computers are good at golf because they have hard drives.

 

[Woodznutz]

Golf.
"A game whose purpose is to place a small ball into a distant hole using instruments totally unsuited to the task."

 

[hjmick]

A husband and wife were golfing when suddenly the wife asked, "Honey, if I died would you get married again?"

The husband said, "No sweetie."

The woman said, "I'm sure you would."

So the man said, "Okay, I would"

The woman then asked, "Would you live in our house with her?"

The man replied, "Well, yeah, I guess... it's paid for after all."

Then the woman asked, "Would you let her sleep in our bed?"

And the man replied, "Yeah, I guess so."

"Would you give her my car?"

The man looked at her and said, "If sh wanted to, I guess so... it's only a couple of years old..."

Then the wife asked, "Would you let her use my golf clubs?"

And the husband replied, "No, she's left handed."

 

[Woodznutz]

Jesus and Moses were playing golf. Jesus ripped a T-shot into the rough, whereupon a squirrel picked it up and dashed up a tree with it. A hawk swooped down and snatched the ball, dropping on the edge of the green, where a rabbit kicked the ball which fell into the cup.

Moses, scowling, looked at Jesus and complained, "Are you going to play golf or screw around?"

 

[1srelluc]

Sometimes the jokes make themselves....Hubba-Hubba!


Golf influencer Paige Spiranac helping women with big breasts up their golf game.

It's great to see the courage she is showing in not only living with her impediment but helping other women who have the same problem.

Happy place.

https://x.com/PaigeSpiranac

Paige Spiranac on Instagram: "How to swing with some great cans⛳️"

_paige.renee on March 25, 2026: "How to swing with some great cans⛳️".

www.instagram.com

 

[marvin martian]

As a golfer kept losing balls in water hazards and deep roughs, his partner advised him to use an old ball when facing such difficult shots. He replied, "I never had an old ball."

My last round was a joke.

 

[Woodznutz]

My last round was a joke.

My last hole was the best I ever shot. I haven't picked up a club since. I went out on top.

 

[Woodznutz]

As a funeral procession drove past the golf course a player removed his hat and stood silent for a moment. His partner observed, "I'm impressed that you would pause your game to show such reverence for the deceased. The golfer responded, "Well, it's the least I could do, we were married for thirty years."

 

[MarathonMike]

Joe and Jim were discussing the sudden passing of their friend. Joe says "So me and Fred are putting out on 9 and he just keels over and he's gone!" Jim says "Oh my God that's horrible!" Joe says "You're telling me! I mean the whole back 9 it was hit the ball and drag Fred, hit the ball and drag Fred".