Fanfuckingtastic dip

AllieBaba

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Oct 2, 2007
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Okay, so guess what I forgot for the Thanksgiving food orgy? I forgot the CLAMS for the CLAM dip. I have the cream cheese, the sour cream, the worsteshire sause...everything but the clams. And the lemon. Which are sort of fundamental for clam dip.

So this is what I did:

I took two packages of cream cheese, 1 small container of sour cream, about a cup of shredded mozzerlla left over from a pizza I made for the kids a while back, garlic powder, worsteshershire (or however it's spelled) and one can of the two cans of crab I got for crab salad.

Now I only bought one small bag of greens for the crab salad, because it's no good after the first day, but two cans of crab, because I wanted it to be super crabby. But sorta crabby is fine. I'll slam some green onions in there and nobody will even know.

Anyway, I beat that shit together with salt & pepper and guess what? IT'S FUCKING FABULOUS. The best dip ever.

I stuck it in a cake pan (one of the 9 inch rounds) and I'm baking it. If it's this good cold, imagine what it will be like hot and melty with a crust...

Yummy. We're having that tonight for whore's doovers. Because my one guest for tomorrow is about 1.5 hours away. We'll get drunk and stupid and eat the shit out of that and then be lazy tomorrow. After I turn the fucking turkey to fully brine.

Jello is halway set, so I stirred in the strawberries...I'll wait until tomorrow to stick bananas in, so they don't turn all yucky.

I am so set for Thanksgiving.

Once again, I'm a goddess. They made little carved images of me at the dawn of (human) time. I'm just that awesome.

Next week: Butchering chickens at mom's house. She's like, "Allison, you have to come out to butcher. It bothers everyone but you."

I'm like, I'm there.
 
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No shit? This stuff that I dredged up has a name?

What's Old Bay? Please tell me it's drinking alcohol and not aftershave.
 
Speaking of Jello... I just finished making a huge tray of Jello shots. They're chilling in the fridge as I type. I'll be at my folks house for Thanksgiving dinner, but the real party will start when we get back home.
 
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Lol...I can remember Thanksgiving not just being about food.

That was a long time ago though, babe. Enjoy.
 
No shit? This stuff that I dredged up has a name?

What's Old Bay? Please tell me it's drinking alcohol and not aftershave.
Ah....Old Bay is made by McCormick spices. It put them on the map. It was just a small company in Baltimore (pronounced 'Bal-more') who found a nice combo of herbs and spices for steaming Chesapeake blue crabs and McCormick bought them.

One can't have Chesapeake crabs without Old Bay! It would be blasphemy. Oh, and lots of Old Bay needs to be used as it makes the beer even better.

oldbay.jpg
 
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Frogen, if you're too drunk to spell favorite, you probably shouldn't be skinnydipping. It leads to brain damage and death.

Besides which, in the world in which I live, skinny dipping in MAY, much less, November, is an event which might claim your life.

I'm going to have to look up Old Bay seasoning and share it with my sis, and we'll have us a big ol' party.
 
crabhouse.jpg



Damn, I feel the need for a roadtrip to Annapolis all of a sudden. Screw turkey. (The crabs are crusted in Old Bay and one gets a cup of it on the side as well.)
 
Frogen, if you're too drunk to spell favorite, you probably shouldn't be skinnydipping. It leads to brain damage and death.

Besides which, in the world in which I live, skinny dipping in MAY, much less, November, is an event which might claim your life.

I'm going to have to look up Old Bay seasoning and share it with my sis, and we'll have us a big ol' party.

November is Spring here in Australia, and the water is fine.

But no one swims here sober, too many sharks.
 
I had no idea you were an Aussie, you bastard.

Okay, so it's fine to skinny dip with sharks drunk, and probably safer than swimming sober with them, crazy bastard.

Does shark make a good baked dip, btw? I'm thinking it's more like red meat, adn therefore not such a fine dip for Ruffles With Ridges. However, I'm more than willing to butcher them for the sake of science.
 

I caught a case of those once in Rio.

Ew, those look like ocean spiders.

Not into them unless they're appropriately packaged. I grew up on that shit. On the Pacific, not the Atlantic, coast.

Not that it really bothered me, but I'll never forget them scrabbling at the lid of the crab boiling pot when they were thown into boiling water alive..

But the most offensive memory is the fucking smell.

I'm not big on real crab. I like the processed shit. In moderation. Mixed with many cheeses, possibly some bread crumbs, and baked.
 
Frogen, if you're too drunk to spell favorite, you probably shouldn't be skinnydipping. It leads to brain damage and death.

Besides which, in the world in which I live, skinny dipping in MAY, much less, November, is an event which might claim your life.

I'm going to have to look up Old Bay seasoning and share it with my sis, and we'll have us a big ol' party.
Likely, you'll find it in the spice section of the grocery. I could get in in the Midwest when I was living there.

K.

So, here's my crab dip recipe (I do it by eyeball and taste, so you'll have to ad lib too).

A package or two of cream cheese.
About half of that of sour cream (mayo in a pinch, but not as good).
Lots and tons of freshly picked blue crab meat (canned crap for you poor souls on the Left Coast).
Some shredded cheddar.
Worchestershire - a few glugs.
Old Bay - I dunno, until it tastes right.
Salt and pepper to your taste.
Mix it up (well, add the crab after you've mixed the other stuff up).
Toss it in the oven (maybe 350, dunno - something that will heat it through but not make it bubbly).
When heated through, put a bit more shredded cheddar on top and toss it under the broiler until it juuuuuuust starts to brown - but don't let it brown.
Get a crusty baguette or some pita chips - depending on your crunch cravings at the time - and dip away.
 
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So, here's my crab dip recipe (I do it by eyeball and taste, so you'll have to ad lib too).

A package or two of cream cheese.
About half of that of sour cream (mayo in a pinch, but not as good).
Lots and tons of freshly picked blue crab meat (canned crap for you poor souls on the Left Coast).
Some shredded cheddar.
Worchestershire - a few glugs.
Old Bay - I dunno, until it tastes right.
Salt and pepper to your taste.
Mix it up (well, add the crab after you've mixed the other stuff up).
Toss it in the oven (maybe 350, dunno - something that will heat it through but not make it bubbly).
When heated through, put a bit more shredded cheddar on top and toss it under the broiler until it juuuuuuust starts to brown - but don't let it brown.
Get a crusty baguette or some pita chips - depending on your crunch cravings at the time - and dip away.

The best cooks always ad lib, there must be some liberty and love in all food.

I like the cut of your crab Ms. Mondo.
 

I caught a case of those once in Rio.

Ew, those look like ocean spiders. ....
Technically, they sort of are in similar classification.

.... Not into them unless they're appropriately packaged. I grew up on that shit. On the Pacific, not the Atlantic, coast. ....
That explains your lack of taste. ;)

.... Not that it really bothered me, but I'll never forget them scrabbling at the lid of the crab boiling pot when they were thown into boiling water alive..

....
Steaming is better. And likely more cruel. I don't care, though.

.... But the most offensive memory is the fucking smell. ....
Smells like the Bay and the ocean to me. *sigh* Love it.

.... I'm not big on real crab. I like the processed shit. In moderation. Mixed with many cheeses, possibly some bread crumbs, and baked.
'sOK. I bet it does taste good.
 
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Actually, now that I think of it, neither steaming nor boiling is cruel at all. Neuro studies of blue crab indicate that they do not have pain sensing neurons for heat (don't have the study, but a pal of mine participated in it).

No guilt. Whew.
 
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All this talk of Thankgiving stuff is making me homesick.

Thanks y'all.

Happy Fucking Thanksgiving, you swines.
 
Actually, now that I think of it, neither steaming nor boiling is cruel at all. Neuro studies of blue crab indicate that they do not have pain sensing neurons for heat (don't have the study, but a pal of mine participated in it).

No guilt. Whew.

I could care less about cruelty addressed to water spiders. Think of the way they eat. It doesn't even have to be dead. They just gnaw away.
 

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