Dear
shockedcanadian
I am sorry to hear you suffered this systemic abuse, both in the personal abusive situation and then the legal abuse and reaction that becomes multiple levels.
I also went through multiple levels of abuse BEFORE I found out what was really going on and WHERE all this abusive pattern and layers of abuse were coming from.
Like you, had I known this was already conditioned into that person, their family, and society and institutions, I would have avoided getting into that situation!
You and I didn't know this was going to get imposed on us as victims until after the fact.
Now that I learned where the abuse comes from, I am advocating, educating and promoting research studies into the solutions to prevent abuse from being repeated and imposed on other people, like you and me suffered.
The patterns of abuse were already repeating in those family lines, and these collectively repeat in our social institutions and society because people project their personal and family issues onto other relations.
You are basically stating the same thing that I ran into with the bullying abuse embedded and repeating on all levels so you had no way out. I was in a similar situation and I got blamed for the abuse that occurred.
The way to break the cycle of abuse and disorder is forgiving so you free yourself emotionally from the problems that come from other people.
The cure to removing the causes of abuse is the spiritual healing process that many different methods teach for full recovery of past issues, including overcoming generational abuse, Genocide, even sexual abuse and rapes and wars that otherwise carry forward in future generations like the wars and tribal racism we still see today.
Keep working on forgiving the past and redirecting your conscious energy and attention to positive solutions
If you hold on to anything negative from the past, that attracts negative energy and the patterns of abuse and victimhood repeat in your mind and in your relations.
You want to clean that out of your mind, thoughts, words and space so you only operate with clean positive energy.
You don't want bad fuel pumping through your mind that is like an engine and needs loving positive thoughts to keep running smoothly.
We can still hold people accountable for correcting and preventing abuse but WITHOUT the negative emotions attached. Forgiveness helps heal the bad memories, you can still use that experience to seek correction and teach from to help prevent others from falling into the traps of abuse that affected us and other victims. It becomes easier to resolve these issues and work with other people by going through the steps of spiritual healing to fully recover. Then with a clear mind, and better ability to communicate, more can be done to address and prevent the causes and All levels of abuse.
I'm sorry you ran into much the same, and it takes several layers and stages to overcome each incident where you ran into more and more opposition and projection of abuse blaming and imposing on you.
Glad you are out of that relationship and hope we can help each other with support to recover from the PTSD and other problems that this causes.
Give yourself time and don't be surprised if you still run into shocks and triggers, if you panic or suddenly have anxiety or reactions to people because of the past abuses. It takes time to diffuse and release all the toxic abuse that was dished out onto you. Let it go and it will eventually clear out by not adding any more to the pile.
Keep seeking positive focus and loving solutions and this will prevail and dissipate the negative remnants and memories of the past. I pray for your complete healing and clarity so you feel fully restored and don't carry any more anxiety or toxic energy from the past abuses.
Forgiveness allows us to deal with our own responsibilities and let the problems from other people belong to them not to us. We have our own issues to deal with.
Take care and keep posting and working through to release all the bad memories and feelings you got from this experience.
Use this board and social media to release and heal.
Take care, love and hugs from Houston
And more power to you!!!!
Love, Emily
